| Rhetorical Questions |
| *If you were born on February 29 of a leap year, when IS your birthday? *If you had x-ray vision, but closed your eyes, could you still see? *What does OK actually mean? *What does the K in K-mart actually stand for? *Why do the numbers on a phone go one way and the numbers on a calculator go another? *Why do we say "bye bye" and not "hi hi"? *How do you handcuff a one-armed man? *Why is the abbreviation for pound lb when l or b isn't in the word pound? *Why do they call it your "bottom", when it is really in the middle of your body? *Can a hearse driver drive a corpse in a car pool lane? *Why is the name of the phobia for the fear of long words Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia? *How do they get those boats in those glass bottles? *If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be? *Why is it called football when you hardly use your feet? Why isn't soccer called football (in America anyway)? *Can a guy named Nick have a 'nick'name? *If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them? -If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter? (I love cats but I do think it's funny) -If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from? -How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow sign? -When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn? -If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer? -Why does your nose run and your feet smell? -Why is there an expiration date on sour cream? -If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? -Why is the man who invests your money called a broker? -When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say? -Why isn't 11 pronounced "onety-one"? -"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? -If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed? -If FedEx and UPS were to merge, would they call it "FedUp"? -Do Lipton tea employees take coffee breaks? -What hair color do they put on the driveers licenses of bald men? -I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny forks and spoons so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? -You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. -Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts! -If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose? -If aliens are in search of intelligent life, why do they abduct the stupidest people? |
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