Topic this week: Taking a Pause
It's good to be back. I've had quite a day today, so I hope what I say makes some sort of sense to you.
I've had a lot of people writing to me explaining that they have a problem with anger. Their anger seems to create a lot of anxiety. DAH! I'm sure it does. Let's talk about a technique that I use that seems to really help me when I'm angry or I'm listening to someone who is in my face about something.
The technique I use, as do many others, is called 'pausing.' It really works well. Someone asked me "Isn't taking a 'pause' like counting to ten?" In a sense it is, but it's much more effective and relaxing and the benefits are far more reaching. Take today, for instance. I've been at my computer trying to do this newsletter for the past 2 hours and all I've done is answer the phone and have to make calls to reasure people that everything is fine and that my husband will get the work finished that needs to be done. It's really frustrating, but I took my short pauses and I'm fine.
When my anxiety level is rising I take a pause. This is how it works: You can be anywhere or with anyone. When you feel your anxiety level rising or you are frustrated, angry, or frazzled just close your eyes, breath into the abdomen. Take slower breaths and focus on your breathing. By focusing on the breath it helps you to relax. Do this for a minute or two. It feels soooo good. I also use it when I want to simply reduce the negative inner-dialogue. If someone is in your face just tell them you need to take a bathroom break. Then practice 'pausing' when you are alone, if that makes you more comfortable.
The technique has helped a lot of the people that I've suggested it to. They will call me or write me back telling me that they use it all the time now. It will take you some time to remember to use this technique, but after you use it once or twice you will automatically remember to use it. It helps so much that you can't help but remember it. I will use it right now because there's a big storm that's coming through and I need to turn off my computer. What a day!!
I'm back and I hope the storm has passed. Spring is most definitely here. If you don't like the weather just wait ten minutes and it will change.
Try pausing when you feel the need. It may take practicing it a few times before you realize the full benefits from it. It helps us to reconnect to the 'now'; the present moment. It will bring you down from and distance you from the anxiety and pressure you are feeling at the moment. 'Pauing' is what I call mini-meditation.
I read a book last week that I thought might interest you. It's a very short book (only 59 pages, not including blank pages for notes), but interesting. It's also a soft cover book that is small enough to carry in a purse or in the glove compartment in your vehicle. You could also have a copy that you could keep in the drawer of your desk at work. It's entitled A Layman's Guide to Managing Fear by Stanley Popovich. It is only $6.50 in the US. If you would want more information on this very nice little book you can go to http://www.trebleheartbooks.com/mvStanPopovich.html or if you would like to email for information you can go to submissions@trebleheartbooks.com . Please check it out. It would be worth your time.
You can also practice this technique by sitting in silence. Take time to re-group. Silence really is golden. It settles the mind chatter and inner-dialogue that bombard us daily. Quiting the mind takes practice and perserverance. Don't forget to meditate daily, if possible. Where would we be without meditation? I shutter to think.
GOAL FOR THE WEEK
Practice 'pausing' as much as you can this week. You want to get into the habit of using it.
TIPS FOR THE WEEK
Practice breathing.
Practice slow breathing and focusing on the breath.
Enjoy nature. Walk and breath in the fresh Spring air. Enjoy all that is new and born anew. Pay attention to the new buds on the trees, the green grass, baby birds, and Spring flowers.
INSPIRATION
We have to face the pain we have been running from. In fact, we need to learn to rest in it and let its scaring power transform us.
~~Charlotte Joko Beck~~
Like a caring mother
Holding and guiding the life
Of her only child,
So with a boundless heart
Hold yourself and all beings.
~~Buddha~~
Enough. These few words are enough.
If not these words, this breath.
If not this breath, this sitting here.
This opening to the life
we have refused
again and again
until now.
Until now.
~~David Whyte~~
AFFIRMATIONS
I will accept myself, completely.
I will practice compassion to others.
I will replace anger with the art of 'pausing.'
God/Higher Power, allow me to be a channel of your peace.
I refuse to judge others as they may have judged me.
I am light and love.
I am who I am and I am pleased.
I refuse to allow someone else's issues become mine.
Until next week I wish for you sunny, warm Spring days and that you are blessed with the chirping of birds and the beautiful sounds of the season.
Hugs and Peaceful Moments,
Sue
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