Season One: Episode Two:

Brief Summary: Night Creeper Leader takes a bonk on the head with historical results (I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…)

Summary: Lady Jaye and Bullhorn are in Egypt. Pyramid City, Egypt to be precise. They’re on their way to a local museum when they pass a large statue of a pharoh which Jaye looks over appreciatively (apparently she’s taking that whole EcoWarrior thing of Flint’s REALLY hard, poor thing. Gotta be rough seeing the man you love running around like some bargain basement Captain Planet).

Night Creeper Leader and some Laser Vipers are trying to steal some treasures from the museum. Jaye and Bullhorn attempt to stop them and in the ensuing chaos Night Creeper Leader takes a clout on the head. This causes him to steal a pharaoh hat and suddenly remember what he must do! Which includes escaping along with the other Cobras.

Back at the Cobra Base we learn what NCL must do! Apparently, the conk on the head has enabled him to ‘remember’ that he used to be a pharaoh in Egypt, back in y’know, pharaoh days. Cobra Commander hears this and declares that NCL is nuts. Which is a clear case of Pot. Kettle. Black.

Destro takes CC aside and tells him ix-nay on the uts-nay. Apparently Cobra is broke once more, probably because they waste their time and resources on idiotic schemes rather than y’know, stuff that would work. But, because they’re broke, they need to play along with Night Creeper Leader so that the Night Creepers will continue to work for them. Cobra Commander reluctantly agrees, no doubt remembering the Murphy’s Law of Combat that states “Never share a foxhole with anyone crazier than yourself.”

We come back from commercial to find that Cobra Frogmen have shown up and taken over the Nile Canyon Dam. Just why they’ve done this, we’ll have to wait a couple minutes to find out.

First, we have to see Sergeant Slaughter doing aerobics. The Joes are using a satellite hookup to broadcast Sargercise to the Joes currently in Egypt so they don’t get all chubby and such. Luckily for the Joes (and my sanity) Cobra Commander picks now to cut in with one of his “Citizens of the World” type broadcasts. Only now it’s “Citizens of Egypt” since they’re focusing on one country for now.

The Commander tells Egypt that Cobra holds Pyramid City hostage. Bombs have been planted in the aforementioned dam. Also, Egypt will have a new leader! Pharaoh Night Creeper Leader! (Did his MOM name him Night Creeper Leader? Geeeze…)

The Joes scramble to try and save Pyramid City. Hawk sends Bullhorn to negotiate with Cobra (or at least to fumble around at trying to negotiate in order to buy the Joes more time to evacuate the city). Jaye and the others get to work evacuating the city…which leads to the question of the episode:

Jaye goes over to a robed figure, figuring they’re a local who hasn’t gotten the hell out of Dodge…err Pyramid City yet. Instead, it turns out to be Night Creeper Leader who has decided that Jaye is to be his queen. Probably because she’s the only female in this episode.

Meanwhile, we find out that Bullhorn sucks as a negotiator. Cobra Commander tells him he has twelve hours to see that Night Creeper Leader is named pharaoh or else the dam is going to be blown. Hawk tells Bullhorn it’s okay, basically they just want to buy time for two handpicked men to go in and try to defuse the bombs.

Grid-Iron and Ambush are the two men chosen for the job. Because apparently there’s no one better to send in when explosives need defused than a hand to hand combat specialist and the guy who’s really good at staying hidden. (And no, neither one has a secondary specialty in demolitions, at least not according to their file cards.)

At the Cobra base, a pair of vipers carry in Lady Jaye wrapped in a rug. They unroll her and let her drop to the floor.

Luckily for me, my friend Brian Kelly was over and watching this episode with me and clued me in to the significance of this scene. Apparently back in the days before Cleopatra was ruler of Egypt, she snuck in to see the Emperor wrapped in a carpet. It’s a neat little reference that you’re only likely to catch if you know something about Egyptian history and it’s rather surprising to see it in a kids show from the early 90s, let alone in a DiC episode of GI Joe. Kudos to the writing staff.

Night Creeper Leader is pleased with how things are going so far. The Night Creepers will continue to work for Cobra and Lady Jaye will be made his queen. Jaye isn’t too thrilled about that plan, but she’s playing along for now to keep the Cobras from detonating the dam.

Destro, meantime, takes Cobra’s forces to begin looting Pyramid City which was apparently the real plan all along.

At the dam, Ambush and Grid-Iron work on defusing the bombs. Ambush drops one bomb but luckily Grid-Iron kicks it back up to him. (Was Tripwire out sick or what?)

Some of Cobra’s troops discover Grid-Iron and Ambush and attack. In retaliation, Grid-Iron tosses a grenade at them. Inside the dam. The dam they are trying to keep from blowing up.

Cobra loots Pyramid City! YAY!

Night Creeper Leader is horrified by this. He wants to defend his city against the ravages of Cobra. Lady Jaye manages to persuade NCL to allow her to call in the Joes.

The Joes show up and chase Cobra off, but Destro still has the gold they stole from a local bank. Or at least he does until Salvo drops the big statue of the pharaoh from the museum on the hitch, causing Destro to lose the trailer.

Night Creeper Leader flips out once his statue is destroyed. Jaye manages to get the detonator away from him but NCL manages to activate it anyhow.

The last three bombs that the Joes weren’t able to defuse in time go off, causing the dam to crumble. Grid-Iron and Ambush escape, but the city is in danger of being flooded out.

Hawk comes up with the plan of sealing off the canyon, then diverting the river to another canyon (where apparently it won’t flood any local villages or any other non-tourist attractive cities).

Cobra’s forces seal off the canyon while the Joes blast a tunnel into the next canyon, diverting the river and saving the city. Now that the peril has been avoided, the Cobras go back to firing on the Joes who end up having to climb for their lives to avoid being wiped out.

Hawk saves Salvo for no damn good reason (“The Might of Right”? What? Austin 3:16 was taken?) Hawk and Salvo are then rescued in turn from the flood by another Joe whose name escapes me.

Night Creeper Leader and Lady Jaye escape the local Cobra stronghold before it’s washed away by the flood. They end up standing on a small island of stone that is in peril of being eroded away by the flood waters. Night Creeper Leader’s dream of being pharaoh is destroyed, for which he blames the Joes and decides to leave with Cobra who has come to airlift him out. But, before he goes, he uses his little ninja crossbow thingy to stretch a rope across the flood waters so that Jaye can escape. Awww.

His pharaoh’s hat, on the other hand, ends up washed away by the flood waters. Doh…

Commentary: This episode isn’t so bad. The plan halfway makes sense, there’s some good action scenes and the Cleopatra/rug bit is kind of a nice Easter egg for folks who know such things. My nits are small, but pick them I must.

Firstly, apparently in the comics Night Creeper Leader had an actual name. It would have been nice if they’d given him one in the cartoon as well since Pharaoh Night Creeper Leader just sounds stupid.

Second, what the hell is up with Lady Jaye in these episodes? She’s coming across as a major ditz. Part of it, I know, is the lines but I also think part of it is how the voice actress is reading those lines. She just doesn’t have the same inflection that the original actress did.

It is interesting to note that we never really learn whether or not NCL actually is the reincarnation of a pharaoh or whether it’s really just a delusion on his part. Personally, I’m aiming toward a delusion but it’d be interesting to know either way. It’s also worth noting that, if it is a delusion, he doesn’t seem to lose the delusion at the end of the episode. Instead, he seems to be going on with his life still secure in the ‘knowledge’ that he used to be an Egyptian Pharaoh.

And lastly, I still wanna know: Why does Salvo have that goat?