Hello. My name is Prince Frederick and I am a . . . a fly addict. It's all my father's fault. No, really. I'm not just trying to blame someone else. It is partly my fault but it's mostly his. You see, when he made up the list for my Christening he made a slight error. He left my Godmother off the list and she got a little . . . upset. She sort of flew off the handle and turned me into a frog. She has since sought therapy to try and find better ways of dealing with her stress.

Anyway, I had to get a beautiful princess to kiss me so that I could turn back to normal. You can imagine the line of them just waiting to do so. It took me twenty years, but I finally found one willing to kiss my slimy frog lips. After my transformation we were married and supposed to live happily ever after. Unfortunately, she left me because of my addiction. Well, that and the lily pads in the bathtub drain.

I'm hoping that as I start down the road to recovery that she will find it in her heart to take me back. After all, I did convince her to kiss a talking amphibian. And I'm not the only one in this marriage who has problems! I can't pry that stupid golden ball out of her hands! Well maybe I'm just better off without her! I'll go find someone who'll love me for who I truly am! And we'll live happily ever after! So there!

Keena Lindsay

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