Chapter 3

Die slowly opened his eyes, feeling warm breath tickling his cheek and something heavy on his chest. He found a long slender arm across his chest….well….It was not his. He gradually turned to face whoever it belonged to.

The peaceful face was buried in the pillow, snoring softy. "Toshiya…" Die gasped. He immediately pulled himself up from the bed, feeling his head spin and his eyes was dull. Checking himself, he found himself in his own room, why Toshiya was here.

Toshiya groaned offendedly with Die’s movement. "What time is it?" He murmured even though his eyes were still closed.

" Around 9 o’clock in the morning! Ah!… It’s so late." Die looked at the clock and answered.

"Well…. It’s too early actually." Toshiya retorted, tugging blanket over his head.

"No! We have recording at 10 o’clock. Wake up! Toshiya!" Die shook Toshiya’s shoulder.

"Why will we have recording today in the event that Shinya is sick?" Toshiya’s sleepy voice protested.

Die stunned. ‘Shinya….’ The picture of Shinya lying weakly on the bed flashed back in his thought. His shoulders slumped down immediately. His heart was breaking into pieces. Shinya who is so special for him but he forced him to danger. How was Shinya now? Die wanted to be by his side, but he hadn’t been brave enough to face him.

"Die…" A soft voice pulled him back to reality. "I’m sorry. I don’t mean..." Toshiya poked his head from the blanket, touching Die’s hand gently.

"It’s O.K., Toshiya. It’s my fault." Die smiled, but it’s not as bright as usual. He had remembered last night clearly. He had cried in guilt but didn’t know when he fell asleep in Toshiya’s comforting arms. "Thank you, Toshiya," Die said sincerely.

"You’re welcome. Ne…Die…don’t be so sad. Shinya is fine, right? He will get well soon." Toshiya patted Die cheerfully.

"… and he’ll hate me forever." Die stated to himself. He got up from the bed quickly before seeing Toshiya’s sorrowful face followed his back.

* *

Yoshiki gradually slid himself out off the bed but the ailing young guy stirred and groaned under the blanket in pain. "Ah~ Sorry, Shinya!"

"Don’t mind. I’m fine, just feeling sore." Shinya answered and rubbed his eyes with his back hand.

"You should take a break today." Yoshiki looked at him.

"Can I? It will affect our work schedule."

Yoshiki shook his hand. "That doesn’t be matter. I will re-arrange the schedule. We will finish our work in time." He smoothed the amber hair gently.

Shinya stared at the older guy thankfully. "Thank you very much, Yoshiki-san. You are so kind and gentle to me."

"Don’t take it’s in business. You are my subordinate. I have to take care you." Yoshiki took it easy in comforting Shinya but he didn’t know he hurt the younger guy.

‘Yoshiki-san has been kind to me coz he is our producer.’ Shinya felt his mind sadly.

"What wrong with you, Shinya?" Yoshiki asked in worry as he saw Shinya’s expression drop. "Are you still feeling sore?" His long fingers cleared Shinya’s scattered hair off his face, seeing faint bruises on his face.

"I’m all right. I just thought How I could pass through the worst night, if without you." Shinya raised his voice cheerfully. He pulled himself out his day dream. Yoshiki has never felt any special thing for him. He confirmed himself.

"Shinya?"

"Yes.."

"Can your band mates come in and look at you? They are so worried about you." Yoshiki didn’t know what the younger drummer was thinking as he kept silent. "Are you still angry with them?"

"Oh! No! I’m not and never." Shinya shook his head suddenly. "I only…. can’t face them right now. I’m so stupid to let myself in danger. I’ve put our band in trouble."

Yoshiki nodded slightly. They kept silent for a moment before Yoshiki got up. "Back to rest, Shinya. I will have breakfast for you in the bed. Let’s try my cooking!"

"Huh!"

"I usually get my breakfast done by myself." Yoshiki crossed his arm on his chest proudly. "You are so lucky, Shinya. You could have breakfast from one of the most inconsiderate person in Japan." He bantered. The younger guy hid giggling under the blanket.

* *

Toshiya shifted himself in oppression. Kyo and Kaoru were sulky themselves. They had a little quarrel. Kyo had known about Shinya in the morning and he was pissed off. He raised a hue that nobody told him last night. He had blamed Kaoru though the guitarist insisted he was sleeping. Die had been quiet since he got on the van, staring at Shinya’s seat absentmindedly. Finally, they arrived studio. Kyo walked in circle in front of the studio, anxiously.

"Hey!… Stop Kyo! You make me dizzy!" Kaoru snapped.

He ignored his leader and asked Toshiya. "Do you think Shinya will come here today?"

"I don’t know Kyo." Toshiya answered.

"What about him?" Kyo asked again.

"You should ask Die and Kaoru. They went to see Shinya last night."

Kyo rolled his eyes. " Ah! Toshiya, What were you doing in Die’s room this morning?"

Toshiya blushed. "I…I…"

"You two had talked about Shinya?" Kyo wasn’t teasing the bassist, he was just curious. He looked at Toshiya with innocent eyes.

"uh-uh" Toshiya answered embarrassedly.

"Hey! Look!" Kyo bounced and pointed at a black Ferrari arrived. "It’s Yoshiki-san’s car, isn’t it?"

They got very disappointed when they found that Shinya hadn’t come along for the ride. Yoshiki told Shinya was taking a break today and they had to start working without him. Shinya’s schedule was postponed.

"If I finish my job, can I go to see him?" Kyo asked hopefully.

"He will come here tomorrow. Don’t worry Kyo-kun." Yoshiki smiled fatherly. "O.K. Let’s work boy!" He clapped his hands and the DEG members, unsatisfied themselves, walked into the recording room.

"You mean he will stay overnight at your house again tonight?"

Yoshiki found Kaoru standing behind him.

"Kaoru, Do you want to say anything?" he raised his eyebrows.

The guitarist kept silent for a moment before he said. "I shouldn’t say out those words, should I ?"

"What do you mean?"

"Shinya is special, isn’t he?"

"No!" Yoshiki exclaimed instantly. " You don’t understand." He sighed. "Shinya was in shock and feels uneasy to see all of you at that time. I can’t drag him back to the hotel or let him stay at the hospital last night."

"What had happened to him? It’s serious, isn’t it?"

Yoshiki rubbed his forehead. He slowly nodded. "I can’t tell you."

"Why?!…. Shinya is my good friend. You must tell me what happened to my friend."

"Shinya wants to tell you by himself. Give him time, Kaoru."

"No! He’s so young, quiet , unsociable, stubborn and secretive. He could let himself die before telling us!" Kaoru could see his producer’s frown. "You know you can tell me as a leader of the band and … " He lowered his voice as caressed Yoshiki’s cheek gently. The producer shoved Kaoru’s hand away instantly.

"Kaoru!" He hissed.

"I’m sorry." The purple-pink hair guy raised his hand as apologised. Yoshiki sighed heavily. He was not really mad.

"Shinya was violated by a gangster."

"Oh! God!! Had he been raped?"

"Almost raped, if I didn’t rescue him in time."

"Ah~ Shinya’s so lucky." Kaoru felt relieved. "So,…. shall we begin our work?"

The two guys walk toward the working room. Kyo ducked behind the door after he stole a glance at his leader and producer. He couldn’t hear their conversation clearly but their behaviour was strange to his eyes. Kyo nodded to himself. They were hiding something.

* *

The work was over for today and they went back the hotel. Kyo bounced to Toshiya’s room after he took a nap for couple of hours. He wanted to tell what he found out about Kaoru and their producer. After he knocked the door, he didn’t get any response from the blue-haired bassist. He still stood next to the door for a moment until he realized Toshiya was out. So he went to Die’s room and found Die was out too. "Damned you!!!" He stamped his foot down, offended. "Where are you when I need you!?" Finally, he found all his band mates were not here. "Fine!" He snapped himself. He felt very lonely and wondered why they could leave him alone. ‘No one loves me?!’ . Kyo kicked the air and felt like crying.

"What are you doing , Kyo?"

Kyo turned back to see Kaoru’s standing in the hallway. He ran to Kaoru instantly. "Oooowe!!! Kaoru ! Kaoru! Where have you been?"

"Went shopping." Kaoru smiled. "This is for you." Kaoru showed him an American hero model set.

"Ah~~" Kyo widened his eyes in surprise. His anger melted like ice under the sun. "Thank you ! I love them." He cuddled it in his arms. "Could I play with it now?"

Kaoru nodded. "Sure!"

The small guy ran back to his own room happily, forgetting about what he want to tell his friends at all.

* *

Kyo hadn’t known Die and Toshiya went back the hotel in couples hours later. The blue hair guy supported the red hair guy along the hallway with difficulty. Die rest his head on Toshiya’s shoulder and crossed his arm over Toshiya’s other shoulder, closing his eyes and murmuring something quietly.

Toshiya tossed the unconscious guy on the his own bed. "Damned! You are so drunk, Die" He rested his hands on his hip as he stared at the guitarist’s grovelling on the bed.

Die giggled as he felt Toshiya pulling his shoes. Then the slender hands moved to pull his belt from his pants, finally he undid Die’s shirt buttons.

"Die ! Raise your hands up. You have to change your shirt. You had made a mess."

Die didn’t protest. When the shirt fell off him, he pulled the slender guy falling on his chest. Toshiya was surprised a bit. He could see the guitarist’s glossy eyes even in the dim light, feeling hot breath against his lips. Their eyes were on each other for a moment before their lips met, passionately…..

* *

Yoshiki blinked as he heard sound of piano floating in the air at his house when he arrived. He froze for a second. "Crucify My Love…" He whispered to himself. He was so curious who was playing his piano in his house, tiptoeing to his piano room. A delicate figure was playing his piano; his long amber hair flew as he sway his head along with the song emotionally.

What a beautiful scene! He felt like he could see himself when he was young and innocent. The song ended…. The older guy’s clapping startled the young piano player.

"Ah~~Yoshiki-san!!" Shinya felt hot on his face to his ears. "I’m sorry. I used your piano without your permission."

"That’s O.K. Your piano is good!"

"No, it’s not. It sucks." The younger guy lowered his head shyly.

"I don’t think so. Well… In the future you can be the drummer and the pianist well."

Shinya widened his eyes and shook his head furiously. "No! I can’t!!"

"Well….Let’s see what you can do!" Yoshiki put his briefcase on the table and sat next to Shinya, pressing their bodies together on the small chair. "Ah~ Sorry!" Yoshiki shifted himself embarrassingly.

"That’s all right." Shinya gave his idol a big smile as he still redden. In no time, he felt something wrong as his producer kept silent and stared at his face.

"What wrong with me?" He asked bashfully.

The older guy coughed and turned his face away awkwardly. "You are so pretty when you smile. You should smile more often, Shinya."

Shinya felt like he was floating in a dream….