by Lady7

IV-Resolution

***

Kaoru drove slowly down the road; there were people walking around and more cars drove pass. He stopped and took a cigarette out from the shelf. He exhaled slowly, and started to drive again. So Shinya thought it was Die…that’s the most possible thing. Shinya must’ve thought the person was Die…but it wasn’t! Suddenly Kaoru laughed. This is so ironic! Damn ironic! Kaoru remembered taking care of Toshiya in the pub.

That man tried to kiss me

Kaoru stopped laughing, his heart was filled with sadness. Somebody I care so much…I thought I could teach him the value of love! I thought I could stop him from flirting! I thought I was the-

"Hey!!! Watch where you’re going! Baka~!" Kaoru quickly stopped his car, finally realized that he was on somebody else’s way. He leaned back to his seat after parking his car on the side way, smoking, thinking, …If I didn’t stay for Toshiya, I could’ve found Shinya earlier and nothing would have happened. But I did! I DID wait until Toshiya slept and it’s too late to save Shinya. What do I get from Toshiya? NOTHING!!! I love him so much, I wait and wait for the time to come, when he realizes I LOVE him, not LUST for him…and this morning, just now, I found him on my friend’s bed, naked. Kaoru started the engine again.

What do you take me for, Toshiya?

As he was heading to his apartment, he noticed the florist down the road. The flowers looked fresh and beautiful. Kaoru stopped the car again, and ran out towards the shop. At least he gets a proper birthday present

Kaoru bought a small bouquet of red roses, hoping that they would calm Shinya down. The scent of roses filled the car, as well as sadness. Kaoru quickly drove back to his apartment quickly with only one question in his mind,

Do I tell him the truth?

*

Shinya lay on the bed. He had stopped crying. Today was his birthday but he wasn’t happy at all. Kaoru had left looking for the answer. How?! How can he look for the person?! I can’t even remember who it was. I didn’t even see his face! He looked around the room, and found a picture of Kaoru a small table near the bed. He got up the bed and took it so he could see the picture closer. Kaoru was doing a stupid pose. He pouted, and his pink hair was weaving in the air. He wore only old ripped jeans and a tie matching with his hair’s color. His hand was raised, and he was pointing to the sky. Shinya realized the picture was taken on a roof of some tall building. He laughed slightly, imagining how the heck Kaoru got the idea of taking picture on a roof, and the clothes he was wearing plus his expression, Shinya couldn’t help laughing. He shook covering his face, suddenly tears falling from his eyes. He is so nice to me…

Shinya got up, started to tidy up the bed. He had decided that he shouldn’t just sit down and did nothing. Kaoru had asked him to rest, and let him sleep on his bed last night. He had to be a good guest. So he made the bed, picked up dirty clothes, and placed them into the washing basket. Shinya went into the bathroom, facing the mirror he slowly tidied up his hair. He washed his face, dried it and walked out the room. Clothes on the floor, food on the table, even cigarettes ashes, quickly welcomed him. Shinya frowned, how can he live in this place?! HOW CAN HE CREATE SUCH A DIRTY PLACE?! He started to pick up all the clothes one by one.

"Ok! I’m almost done!" Shinya finally finished clearing the living room. He looked around, and found an empty vase on a small half-moon shape glass table. The vase was blue with artistic decoration on it. Behind the table there was a mirror on the wall. That’s nice! Shinya walked across the room, and he picked up the vase. It was beautiful, Kaoru has good taste! He looked up and saw a light bulb on the ceiling. It was placed right on the top of the mirror. The mirror itself was carved with cupid-like angels on it. Even the light bulb was decorated. Shinya looked for the switch, but then he realized it was far across the room. Holding the vase, he walked towards the main switch, holding the vase. As he headed back towards the mirror, he realized, why am I holding the vase? He gently put it on the turned it put the vase on the wooden table next to him. He smiled as he saw the light was on. He stood in front of the glass table, touching it. Suddenly, he looked up facing the mirror.

Say my name…

Shinya froze.

Shin-chan…good boy…

Shinya saw his own reflection, dirty…you don’t deserve this place…you’re not beautiful! You don’t deserve to be under this light! This angelic light!

Shinya looked up but the light blocked his view. You don’t even know who he is!

Say my name…pretty Shin-chan…

Shinya touched his cheeks, he closed his eyes. Then he remembered the touch, the hand, the tongue…even the kiss…No! Go away!!!

Shin-chan…

Shinya opened his eyes, thinking he knew my name!

Shinya was glad, ironically, I know him! I know him! I have to tell Kaoru! Shinya thought that maybe when Kaoru came back to his apartment, he would have had the answer! Smiling to himself, he looked up again, I know him! I just have to remember who it was! It’s much better than a stranger! He talked to his own reflection.

Really? Are you sure? A voice spoke in his mind.

No one can help you!

Shinya shook his head; he grabbed his hair and looked down. He shut his eyes, scared to look at himself in the mirror.

Cheap!

He opened his eyes again, and he could see how dirty, how disgusting he was…"No! I’m not like that!" Suddenly he moved his hands, with all his strength he hit the mirror hard. It made a loud noise and broke into pieces. Shinya’s hands bled, the blood started to drip on the floor. Shinya looked down, …

The only thing he saw was a piece of glass on the floor near his feet.

*

***

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