Heaven Cannot Wait

by Matrim

***********

Part 4b
by Matrim

Dedicated to niccy, my knight in shining armor, Sovanna (OS) for coming up with that term and sumizome.

Tuesday, August 8 6:00 am


Kaoru rolled over in bed and frowned when his arm encountered empty space. He snuggled over a bit then opened his eyes when he still felt nothing. “Totchi?” He sat up in bed and looked around the bedroom then remembered the events from the night before. He sighed, flopping gracelessly down onto the bed again and curled up on his side. Three years of Totchi and he had destroyed it because of a stupid rivalry with Kirito that he just couldn’t let go of. He knew he shouldn’t be so competitive but he couldn’t help it. Kirito bugged him. And he just had to be stupid and place his feelings of jealousy over his relationship with Toshiya. Heaven had given him Toshiya. If that was true then it wasn’t entirely his fault that Toshiya had walked out on him. He had a sneaking suspicion that Heaven was up to something. Bastards, Kaoru thought bitterly and punched his pillow. They had done the same thing with Shinya. Now, they have the nerve to mess with me?! Everything had been going perfect!! He had taken care of Toshiya like he promised, he had faith that Toshiya would never flirt with anyone who tried to hit on him and was proud that Toshiya always proved him right. If that’s the case, some niggling thought said, Then why does Kirito bug you? He hasn’t so much as hit on Toshiya for a year and whenever his name is brought up, you go insane. It’s almost as bad as that Kamijo thing.

Kaoru grabbed the pillow he had been punching and covered his face with it. “That’s because,” he said into the pillow, “Kirito doesn’t have cool hats that you can steal. He doesn’t give away cool hats either. He takes things too seriously.”

“Ooh, answering yourself already, I see.” A familiar voice broke through Kaoru’s thoughts but instead of removing the pillow and greeting him like a normal person, Kaoru only grunted into it. “You know that’s one of the first signs of insanity.” Kaoru grunted again as hide bounced onto his bed, crawled up near him and removed the pillow. “Ugh. You look lovely in the morning as always.” Kaoru glared up at him and hide began laughing. Kaoru reached out for the pillow but hide held it out of his grasp. “No, Kaoru, I’m not letting you lie here and think murderous thoughts at heaven and feel sorry for yourself. Not right now anyway.”

Kaoru groaned and closed his eyes.

hide sighed, “Baka! So pathetic. What am I going to do with you? In any case, stop treating yourself like dirt over that Kirito thing. So you were jealous, so what? Who isn’t jealous when they meet their lover’s exes and they somehow manage to pick them for a cooking team? You know that Totchi loves you, Totchi knows he loves you but there is one big problem here. Care to fill in the blank?”

“He doesn’t know if I really love him…yeah, yeah…”

“Your enthusiasm kills me. Do you really want Toshiya back or do you just want to die?” hide leaned over and pried Kaoru’s eyes open with his fingers. Kaoru rolled his eyes to focus on hide. “Let me tell you that I won’t let that happen.” He gave a rather insane grin. “We have to much at stake here and I won’t let you throw it all away because you’re sad.” He shrugged, sat on the bed and hugged the pillow. “Besides, God only knows what’ll happen to him without you. Do you have an idea how you’re going to win him back and prove your love?”

Kaoru lay sprawled across the huge bed then shot up. “I know! I’ll cook something for him at that damn show!!”

*hide looked at him, “You sure that’s a good idea? I mean, you know the only things you can cook are eggs and pancakes. You can’t really make omelettes and pancakes out of eels or whatever the secret ingredient will be.”

Kaoru stared at hide, “Who says I can’t learn?”

“Are you sure? You’ve only got two or three days. It’s too late to enroll in any cooking classes.”

Kaoru sat up in bed then shifted over to the night stand with the phone. “I just have to make a few calls and then we can plan on getting Toshiya back and proving my love. See, I need to call the band to cancel studio time…which’ll probably delay the album some but that’s okay.” Kaoru happily rambled on as he reached for his planner and sifted through it. He paused on a page full of phone numbers. “Then I’ll have to call the cooking show and tell me them my team mate’s names. I’m sure they’ll let you in. I’ll just call Hikaru, the professional hide cosplayer or something. So, it’ll be you, me, Kamijo, Yuki from Raphael because Shinya still has to return Yukito’s skateboard, Miyabi and maybe Jiro from Glay. Then I’ll have to call all of them and find one of their kitchens to be suitable enough to practice in—“

hide watched Kaoru, uncertainly. “Kaoru, are you okay?”

Kaoru dialed Kyo’s number, “Of course, I’m okay! I’m getting my Totchi back!” He flashed a wolfish determined smile to hide. “Hello, Kyo? Yeah, we won’t be recording today or for the rest of the week.” He pulled his ear away from the phone when Kyo gave a happy yell. He placed his ear back on the phone when he thought it was safe.

It sounded like Kyo had been running around his home for quite some time in happiness as he asked, “Wait a minute. Why are you doing this? What are you up to?”

“Why? Well, because…” Kaoru squirmed a bit. “Dammit, Kyo, do I really need a reason?”

Kyo began laughing. “Oh, I see. Toshiya dumped you, didn’t he?”

Kaoru’s mouth fell open in outrage. “He did not dump me!!!”

“Really? Then—uh—why don’t I hear his trademark laughter in the background and why is he staying over at Die and Shinya’s?” Kyo’s tone sounded smug as Kaoru’s mouth worked but no sound came out of it.

“Don’t give yourself a neural disease trying to find a lie, Kaoru. Just tell him the truth.” hide told him.

Kyo began cackling on the phone just as Kaoru covered the receiver with his hand. “I can’t tell him that—if I do, he’ll never let me live it down!!”

“Kaoru, what’s more important? Your dignity or Toshiya?”

Kaoru decided quickly and snapped back on the phone, “Alright, so we got in a fight and he left me for the time being, but we are not over!! I refuse to believe that we are over. He is mine, do you understand me?!”

There was silence on the phone until Kyo replied, “Damn, Kaoru. You’re possessive. It’s not as if I were going to go out with him. Sheesh. In any case, I’m glad you’re going to get him back but how do you plan on doing that?”

“I’m going to cook him something.”

There was laughter on the other side and Kaoru rolled his eyes. “Great. Thanks for your support. You know I figured I would be able to count on you, my LOYAL—“ Kyo’s laughter escalated at that word, “—vocalist to back me up in times like these, but no! All I get is grief!! You wait, I’ll cook him something so good, he’ll cry!!”

“No, Kaoru. He won’t cry because it’s good, he’ll cry because he’ll get indigestion!” Kyo managed out between his insane cackles.

Kaoru growled and hung up on Kyo. He dialed Shinya and Die’s phone number and waited for them to pick up. Someone picked up the phone but it wasn’t Shinya or Die. “Moshi moshi?” It was Toshiya.

Kaoru hesitated then replied, “Hi, Totchi.”

“Hi, Kaoru.” Toshiya said, softly.

There was an awkward silence for about two minutes until Kaoru decided that they were being stupid and he went on. “Did you sleep well last night?”

“Sort of. The couch was a bit small so I had to kind of curl up a bit. I don’t like doing that. My legs are long and need to be stretched out. You can tell Die doesn’t spend much time on the couch because if he did, they would have a bigger one. I almost fell off of it in the middle of the night.”

“Souka?”

“Hai. Did you sleep well, Kaoru?”

“A bit. The bed’s a bit too big now.” Kaoru turned to look at the rest of the bed, noticing that hide had removed himself from the room. He didn’t bother to question it though. “We have too much pillows now.”

There was an almost sad laugh on the other side, “We don’t have too much pillows Kaoru. We have as much as we wanted. Usually those pillows are being used…but….” Toshiya coughed, “Did you want to talk to Die or Shinya?”

“I just wanted to tell you guys that we won’t be recording for today or for the rest of the week.”

“Oh okay. I’ll past the news along.”

“Totchi?”

“Hai?”

“Ano…are you going to be staying there for the rest of the week?”

“Hai.”

“Oh. I’ll see you then, Totchi.”

“Hai. Mata ne, Kaoru?”

“Mata.”

Kaoru hung up the phone with a sigh then called the cooking show to inform them of his decisions. With that done, he hung up the phone and headed to the bathroom to brush his teeth and take care of the usual morning duties. He got dressed silently and turned to look at the bed. It was too big. There were too many pillows. He glanced around the bedroom. He couldn’t sleep here. Not without Toshiya. He’d have to make his new bed the couch.


************


11:00 am


They all met at a café that Yuki had recommended and among the various plates of food and desserts and coffee were six Jrockers with a purpose. Well, they would have a purpose as soon as they all stopped staring at hide and Kaoru told them why they were here. Kaoru cleared his throat for what seemed the twentieth time that day and finally Kamijo said, “Kaoru, you really ought to get that checked out.”

Kaoru shot him an irritated look. “I am not sick! I’m just trying to get everyone’s attention!”

“Then why not say, ‘Oi! Stop staring at my boyfriend, Hikaru—“

“He’s not my boyfriend!!”

hide pretended to look hurt, “But Kaoru! After all, we’ve been through! I thought we’d hit that milestone! You mean you’ve been using me all this time—“

“Urusai. You’re making it worse not better.”

hide smirked. “Alright, let’s all pay attention to Kaoru.”

They all reluctantly turned away from peering at hide and turned to Kaoru. He smiled appreciatively. “Okay. As you all know, we have been convinced to participate in this damn cooking show which seems to be a spin off of the Iron Chef thing. If we win, we get the respect of a few dozen people and more publicity but I have more at stake than this.” The others looked at him with hostile expressions while hide gave him an occasional face. Kaoru glared at him and went on, “Toshiya and I have been involved in a relationship for three years.”

“Did you get in a fight with him?” Yuki asked. Kaoru was surprised as he looked at the young man, who gave him an odd smile. “We all know that you two had something, Kaoru-san. I mean he would follow you everywhere and vice versa whenever I saw you off stage and on stage he would stick close to you. We didn’t know how right we were though.”

Kaoru scratched the back of his head, nervously and looked away from everyone’s gazes. “Yeah…well…yeah…the problem here is that Toshiya has currently been recruited by his ex, Kirito, to serve on his team. We got in a fight over that because I have a certain….thing…against the creep.” He sighed and looked everyone in the eyes. “But seriously, you know how Toshiya looks like and you know, people never give up on someone like him easily—I mean, for Christ’s sakes! Look at the state I’m in!! And it’s Kirito—ugh!! I’ll kill him—I’ll—“

Hide and Kamijo, who sat on either side of Kaoru, elbowed him in the ribs at the same time. Kaoru grunted and fell over in pain. Miyabi looked at Yuki who looked at Jiro and all three began laughing.

“We understand, Kaoru-san.”

“No, no!! I’m not finished yet. I need to get Toshiya back. I need to prove my love to him and I’m going to do it by cooking him something. You just don’t know…I mean, Toshiya—he needs me! I need him! I can’t have him running around like three years before—he’s gotten sexier and people will prey on him—“

Yuki interrupted his little rant, “We know how Toshiya looks like, Kaoru. I mean, our own Miyabi here still has a tiny crush on him.” Kaoru looked up at Miyabi, who gave an embarrassed grin and a small wave. “Oh, and even Kazuki had a thing for him before.”

Kaoru raised an eyebrow at that, “Really?”

Yuki nodded, “Oh, don’t worry about it, I mean Miyabi is going out with Sakito—“ He made a face at that name. “Sorry, Miyabi…bad memories of an exboyfriend…”

“Don’t worry about it and Kaoru, don’t forget that I’m going out with Sakito.” Miyabi added, hoping that Kaoru wouldn’t kill him after finding out about his secret crush.

Yuki went on,”--and Kazuki is currently with someone if I’m good at reading him. But it’s true, Kaoru-san. Mostly everyone has a thing for Toshiya.”

“However, he does seem most content with you. Why, I have no idea…” Kamijo replied as he stirred his tea and placed the spoon, delicately on the saucer. “But I can’t imagine him with Kirito. And since you’ve been so kind as to help me before, I guess…” He emphasized the word guess, “I’ll help you now.” He smiled teasingly, “Besides, you can’t seem to do anything right by yourself these days.”

Kaoru shook his head but smiled as he looked at the other three across from him. “So? Are you willing to help me?”

“Okay, you know…I’m not all too keen on this relationship thing and your personal vendetta against Kirito.” Jiro said, playing with his cutlery. “But since Hisashi is on the other team and we got into a little argument over who could cook better, I’ll do my best.”

Kaoru nodded, “That’s really all I can ask for. Yuki?”

“Did you even have to ask? Of course, I’ll help you, Kaoru! After all you and Toshiya did for me during that tour we had, it’s only right that I help you.” Yuki beamed at him and Kaoru grinned. He remembered thinking it before and again he thought it. Yuki was so cute sometimes, it hurt. He raised an eyebrow at Miyabi, who jumped and gave a shaky laugh.

“Sure, I’ll help you, Kaoru! Remember, I’m with Sakito now so…so…but Toshiya—I’ll do anything to make Toshiya smile.”

Yuki laughed, “Yeah! Still has that tiny crush!” Miyabi glared at him as Yuki continued chuckling, “But..but…uh…what was I going to say? Yeah! So…you mentioned something about practicing?”

Kaoru nodded and looked down humbly. “Yeah. The problem with this plan is that I’m not a very good cook. I can only cook eggs and pancakes. And rice. And those cup of noodle things.”

“Ah! Practice!” Yuki said, then sighed and laughed again. “Oh, we have only two days to carry this out! We’re not going to make it.” Everyone turned to stare at him and Yuki giggled nervously, “It was just a joke…Alright then…I guess we could use my kitchen to practice in but the only problem would be that we wouldn’t know what the secret ingredient is. We could be cooking up anything that I tell you to cook and well, if the secret ingredient ends up being frogs … I don’t think I would be able to handle that.”

Everyone’s face turned into interesting and varying shades of green. Kaoru coughed, dragging his mind away from that before he could gag. Kamijo closed his eyes and placed his head in his hands. Jiro and hide pushed their plates away from them at the same time. Miyabi made a face and Yuki gave another nervous giggle. “Thank you, Yuki, for that oh-so-brilliant comment at a convenient time such as this.” Kaoru said drily. Yuki flashed him a peace sign.

“So when should we start practicing?” Jiro asked.

“Tonight.” Kaoru replied.

Yuki blinked. “Tonight—b-but, I didn’t tell Hiro that—“

“Is it okay, if I bring someone over?” Jiro looked a bit worried. “I was going on a date tonight.”

“Can Mayu come? I also was going to have a date tonight.”

Kaoru gave an exasperated sigh, “Alright, anyone who has anything planned with their significant others must tell me now. Please.” Kamijo, Jiro, Yuki, and hide raised their hands. Kaoru glared at hide.

hide gave him a indignified look, “What? Don’t think that I actually have a love life too?”

“Who the hell are you seeing? You’re not supposed to have a love life!!”

“How rude! You’re just cranky that everyone else has someone to come home to and you don’t.”

Kaoru’s eyes narrowed and he stared at the alcohol in hide’s hand and then back at hide’s face. “Hopefully, you won’t remember this and apologize to me tomorrow.”

hide shook his head, “No, I will remember this. Actually, I can—“ He looked around at everyone then shut his mouth. “Nevermind. I’ll tell you all about alcohol and me later.”

Kaoru nodded, “Besides, I’m not the only one who hasn’t raised his hand. Miyabi hasn’t and didn’t Yuki say, he was with Sakito?” He peered at Miyabi curiously but to the younger guitarist it looked like Kaoru wanted to devour him for dinner and not in a good way. Miyabi sunk down his chair and Kaoru tried not to cackle. Oh, this one would be fun to mess with. He carefully shoved that thought to the back of his mind and smiled at Miyabi. “Well, what’s up with you and Sakito?”

“He’s on the other team and he was making fun of me…because he said that I couldn’t cook.”

“We’ll just have to fix that, now won’t we?” Kaoru grinned, rather sadistically and the others tried not to groan. “Alright! Okay! Anyone who was planning to have a date tonight must bring them over to Yuki’s house because we’re gonna cook dinner. And we’re gonna eat it.”

Yuki took out his mobile phone and began to dial a number, “Hold on. Let me prep a few people before you announce the rest, Kaoru-san.”

Kaoru nodded and turned to hide, who was currently smoking one of Kaoru’s cigarettes. “Do you bum everything off of me?”

“I have no money. I would get a job but that would mean terrible things for you and I. So I have to use you. I think it’s a fair trade off. I save you from imminent doom. You hand over the alcohol and cigarettes. And the occasional stolen time with one of your guitars.” hide placed his feet on the table as Kaoru rolled his eyes. He tilted his head back and blew smoke up in the air. Yuki stared up at it, his eyes going wide as he spoke on the phone. “All the more reason why money is useless.”

“Yeah, says you.” Kaoru grumbled. “It’s not your stuff.”

“Exactly.”


~5:00 pm, Yuki’s home~


“Which floor does he live on anyway?”

“The tenth.”

“What floor are we on now?”

“The sixth.”

Kaoru placed the groceries down on one of the concrete steps and sat on the stair. He leaned against the metal railing breathing heavily. “I don’t understand why they insist on making three sets of stairs for every single level. I also don’t understand why Yuki failed to tell us about the elevator being out. The two of us standing there like idiots waiting for an elevator to arrive that never did.”

Hide placed his bag of groceries down next to Kaoru’s and sat on the step above him. He stole the cigarette case from Kaoru’s pants pocket and took out a cigarette. Kaoru was so tired, he didn’t care about that. hide reached down again, sifted through Kaoru’s pockets and took hold of the lighter and lit up. He took a drag and sighed as he relaxed against the railing. “Ah, but this is good for your health, Kaoru!! Can’t go taking the elevator all the time.”

Kaoru grunted in response then stole the cigarette from hide’s fingers. “Why can’t you just complain with me?” “Because you’re no fun to complain to. If you were Yoshiki, maybe I would."


*********


Kaoru and hide reached Yuki’s apartment door panting. The elevator had been down for repairs and the vocalist had conveniently forgotten to tell them that little fact. They sagged against the door, arms loaded with grocery bags. The door opened almost making Kaoru fall and Hiro peeked out. “Oh. Konban wa!!” The drummer greeted, trying to ignore the looks they were giving him. “I know…Yuki probably forgot to tell you about the elevator. I don’t know exactly where in the apartment he has hidden himself but…uh…please don’t say you want to kill him.” He took the groceries from them with a nervous smile and led them into the apartment.

“And why can’t we say we want to kill him?” hide asked.

“Because you’d have to wait in line,” Hiro motioned to a seething Kamijo and Miyabi, who both were smoking cigarettes in silence. Mayu sat next to Kamijo. He wore a simple suit with his long hair tied back. He wasn’t really comforting Kamijo, because it looked like no matter what anyone would say, Kamijo would probably still want to kill the younger vocalist. Instead, Mayu sat as close as he could to Kamijo, trying to be a comforting presence. Miyabi, on the other hand, had no one to comfort him so he sat there burning holes into the opposite wall. Hiro placed the grocery bags in the kitchen and began to take out various food products and put them away. hide and Kaoru jumped when a loud thump was heard against the front door. Mayu, Kamijo and Miyabi ignored it.

“That should be Jiro.” Hiro said, quietly and ran to the door. He opened it and instead of seeing an angry kawaii bassist, a calm Jiro stepped through with a young woman and a bag of groceries. “Konban wa,” Hiro gave a polite nervous bow at having so many different people in his home and at the strange behavior Jiro displayed. He took the groceries from Jiro and put them in the kitchen.

hide smirked and turned to Kaoru. “Jiro is upset.”

“Huh? How do you know?”

hide motioned Kaoru closer and whispered in his ear. “Because whenever Jiro is very upset, he gets very quiet and very calm. It’s very disturbing. Pretty soon he will lash out. As soon as the object of his destruction appears, he will lose it. Hopefully, Hiro will protect Yuki.” Jiro walked past them, holding the young woman’s hand and sat at the table next to Miyabi. She looked nervous as they sat but didn’t want to appear like she was smothering him in unnecessary concern. hide gave her a sympathetic smile. Hiro appeared again and motioned them to sit at the table. As soon as Kaoru and hide, did so, Hiro began to speak.

“On behalf of Yuki, I’d really like to apologize to you all for not telling you about the elevator beforehand.” A few groans met his ears and Hiro bowed in apology, “Gomenasai. Hounto ni gomenasai. Yuki has been in a strange mood ever since he came home from that meeting you guys had at the café. I mean, Yukito and his wife appeared for dinner just before all of you came and Yuki has kidnapped them both to somewhere else in this apartment. I don’t know what he’s doing.”

Before Hiro could go on, there was a loud tapping noise on the floor behind him and everybody turned to see what was going on. Yukito stood there with a bored is-this-necessary-expression on his face and his wife was trying hard not to laugh beside him. Yukito cleared his throat after sighing and in the most regal voice he could muster, announced, “Hear ye, hear ye. The honorable chef Yuki will be making an appearance. He also would like to apologize for not telling you about the elevator.”

There were more groans and few laughs from Hiro and hide.

Yukito moved to the side as Yuki stepped out and went to the dining table. He gave Hiro a shy smile, “Hiro, my apron, please?”

Hiro gave Yuki a charming smile and disappeared off into the kitchen. Yuki blushed happily just as Yukito gave a knowing grin to his wife. Hiro appeared once again with a black striped apron and placed it on Yuki, making sure not to knock off his chef’s hat. He moved behind to tie it off, just as Kaoru blandly asked, “Can we do without the pomp and circumstance?”

Yukito made a face at Yuki then replied for him, “No. They always do it. It makes you wonder a few things—“

Yuki stepped back and gave him a swift kick then disappeared off into the kitchen, motioning for the others to follow him. The bassist groaned and glared off into his direction but did nothing.

The others followed him into the kitchen and Yuki beamed. “Alright!! Uh….Kaoru, do you mind if I take charge a bit and hand out jobs?”

Kaoru shook his head, “Go ahead. I have no experience with this so…”

Yuki smiled appreciatively and took a bag off the counter, reached into it and produced a number of aprons. As he handed them out, he said, “Okay. The usual competition has us doing about four or five courses. With that in mind, I assigned the following tasks to the following people. Um…Hikaru is in charge of dessert. Miyabi is in charge of providing us with materials—meaning, Miyabi, that you measure and chop whatever it is we need. Kamijo will be in charge of appetizers. And me, Kaoru and Jiro will be in charge of the main dish. Is that okay?”

Everyone nodded as Yuki beamed again. “Okay!! Now! Lessee…here…” He began to sift through the groceries that had been put away and began muttering to himself. “Alright! We’re going to start with something simple. The ingredient we shall be using today is chicken. Kamijo—you can make a soup with that.” Yuki peered into the refrigerator and took out some chicken, some vegetables, some strange looking cheese, an apple, cream and butter. He went over to the pantry and took out a bottle of vinegar, apple cider, a package full of small looking noodles and another bottle full of something that Kaoru couldn’t identify. “Okay..everyone pay attention because some of these ingredients, you might need to know.” He pointed to a strange looking green thing. “This is a leek.” He pointed to something that looked the same but was a bit smaller. “These are chives.” He pointed to the cheese. “This cheese is Gruyere cheese. Usually, it’s optional since I don’t always have it but today I made a point to get it. That cost a lot of money, mind you and I don’t intend to waste any of it.” He motioned Miyabi forward. He took out a cutting board and removed one of the knives from their stand. He placed the handle of it in Miyabi’s hand and handed him the leeks, the chives, the cheese and the apple. “Miyabi, I need you to dice the leeks. That means you’re going to cut them into tiny cubes. Try not to hurt yourself…while you do so. Then I need you to peel the apple and dice that as well. When you’re done…” Yuki reached into a drawer and took out a grater, “I need you to grate the cheese, please.”

Miyabi nodded a bit shakily then to make sure asked, “Okay..so..you want me to cut the leeks into small bitty cubes and then you want me to peel the apple and do the same to that too?”

Yuki nodded and gave him a reassuring smile, “Hai.”

“Is that it?”

“Well, until someone asks you to chop them something else. That’s all your job is.”

“That’s kind of hard.”

“Yeah. A bit.”

“So what do I do with the chives?”

“Ah. Don’t do anything to it until Kamijo is done.” Yuki turned to the older man, “Kamijo, grab a saucepan please.”

The vocalist blinked at him and carefully took one off a hook, hanging near the doorway to the kitchen and headed toward the stove. Yuki took the butter and a table spoon and handed it to him. He also gave Kamijo a wooden spoon to stir whatever he was going to make it with. “Put two spoonfuls of that into the pan and heat it.” Kamijo nodded, turned the stove on and did so. The others peered over his and Yuki’s shoulders. It was silent until the butter began to melt and Yuki called out over his shoulder, “Miyabi, you done with the leeks yet?”

“Hai….”

“Good….put them in a bowl and give them to Kamijo—the bowls are in the cupboard above your head. Hurry, please.” There was a bit of a clatter as Miyabi reached for them. He handed the bowl of leeks to Kamijo and Yuki gestured for him to put it in the pan. “Are you done with that apple?”

“Kind of.”

Yuki peeked over his shoulder, “That’s enough dicing, Miyabi. If you keep on going, you’ll be mincing and that’s not what we want.”

“Hai…” There was another clatter as Miyabi reached for a bowl and placed the apple pieces in it and handed it to Kamijo. The vocalist dropped it into the saucepan and gave Yuki the bowl. Yuki frowned at it and gave it to hide, who gave it to Kaoru, who gave it to Jiro, who ended up giving it back to Miyabi.

He placed it in the sink. (Like a good boy.~Mat =p)

“Alright…cover it and simmer that for five minutes or at least until it’s pliable and tender.” Yuki opened up a bottle. “This is Calvados. You’re gonna add about two tablespoons of this into the pan and reduce the heat until it’s almost evaporated.”

Kaoru watched as Yuki instructed Kamijo in cooking and after twenty minutes, something slightly edible looking appeared. He peered over Kamijo’s shoulder. “Ano…” he started. “Can we eat it?”

“Are you trying to say it looks terrible?” Jiro asked as if he sniffed the concoction in the pan.

“Nope. Not yet. It needs to be put in a bowl but first it has to be tested by our chef here.” Yuki replied and looked up at Kamijo.

Kamijo looked at the others, looking up at him hopefully. “What? Me? I-I’m the chef?”

“Yeah. You cooked it.” Yuki replied.

“Not really, I only did what you told me to.”

“But did I hold the pan for you? Did I take the wooden spoon from your hand and stir it?”

“Oh. Okay. So…now I have to taste it?” Kamijo looked at the saucepan and the soup dubiously. “It smells good but I have been fooled before.”

“I’ll taste it for you.” Miyabi offered.

“Yeah, and if he dies because of your food, his death will be on your hands.” Jiro piped up. Kamijo scowled at him then picked up the wooden spoon again. He dipped it into the soup, blew on it a bit then raised it to his lips. Everyone held their breath as he Kamijo looked thoughtful then smacked his lips. Finally, Jiro asked, “Well?!”

Kamijo looked insanely proud of himself as he dropped the spoon down on the counter and ran out to the dining room. “Mayu!! Mayu!! Come quick!!” The others stared after him and were still giving him some strange looks as he dragged in Mayu. “Taste it!! Taste it!! I cooked it! And it actually tastes good!!”

Mayu gave the others a pleading look but gave Kamijo a smile before staring down at the soup. He took the spoon from Kamijo’s grasp, dipped it into the soup and took a taste. Kamijo looked at him eagerly, Jiro looked at him with a bit of fear, Yuki had a satisfied look of expectation to him, hide had a general air of curiosity to him, Miyabi hovered a bit out of reach and Kaoru just stared.

Mayu looked up at Kamijo.

“Well? How does it taste?!” Kamijo asked, eagerly.

“You cooked this, Kamijo?”

Kamijo nodded.

Mayu placed the spoon down gently and smiled. “You’re not taking me out to dinner ever again. You’re staying home and cooking.” With that, he turned and walked out of the kitchen and sat back at the table. The six other men slowly looked at each other and began laughing. If anyone asked them why they were laughing, they wouldn’t be able to explain to them. It was slightly relieved and yet slightly insane laughter. So now three of them at the most could cook something interesting. That meant they had a fifty fifty chance of winning. The odds were the same as before but they had the secure knowledge that at least they cook something more than miso soup, rice and pancakes…


Thursday, August 10 1:00 pm


Two days of practicing at Yuki’s kitchen made Kaoru feel a little bit more prepared than usual but when he reached the studio with his team mates, that confidence began to slip a little. After all, it had only been two days and Yuki had been instructing them on each dish they did. They only had an hour to complete the cooking and he was sure all that practicing had taken at least two hours and more. They filed into the green room, one team on either side of the room.

It was silent.

On one side, the one closest to the door sat, Kaoru’s team. Kaoru sat in the middle, flanked by hide and Kamijo. On Kamijo’s right, nearest the door was Yuki, who was scratching at his fluffy light pink hair and trying to keep his cheerfulness despite the atmosphere. On hide’s left was Miyabi, who was currently trying to avoid Sakito’s glances. Jiro leaned against the door next to Yuki, observing the others but saying nothing.

Across from Kaoru sat his most favorite person in the world.

Kirito.

Next to Kirito sat one of Ryutaro’s best friends, Full from Guniw Tools. (How this is relevant will be revealed soon enough.) On the other side of Kirito sat Toshiya, who was avoiding his gaze. Kaoru frowned but decided to take that opportunity to admire Toshiya. He wore a tight sheer black shirt with a boat collar that showed off his pale shoulders. He wore a long black skirt and black platforms. His black and blue hair was swept up into a bun, exposing his long neck.

Totchi was lovely.

As always.

Oh, shit. What did he look like? He had to make sure he looked good too, even though Toshiya hadn’t been with him for two or three days. Usually, Toshiya made sure he didn’t look like he just rolled out of bed. He forced Kaoru to brush his hair instead of running his hands through it and made sure Kaoru ate breakfast before going anywhere among many other things. Quickly, Kaoru took off his leopard print hat and began to smooth down his violet hair, regardless of the looks he received from Kamijo, hide and Kirito. He gave his hair a final pat before placing his hat back on his head. He removed his sunglasses and graciously accepted the polishing cloth that Kamijo used on his own sunglasses. He polished his sunglasses, handed the cloth over to Kamijo with a quick thank you and smirked at it himself in the lenses. He smoothed down his shirt and sat up. There. He looked relatively good looking for Toshiya. He glanced up and smiled when he caught Toshiya staring at him.

“Hi.” He mouthed to the bassist, despite everyone else in the room. As far as Kaoru was concerned they could all fuck themselves—well, maybe just Hakuei and Kirito. He heard a brief chuckle from Yuki and Kamijo, felt hide smirking beside him.

Toshiya looked away shyly but smiled and eventually mouthed back, “Hi.”

“How are you?” Kaoru asked, with a cheeky grin. (Aah! Kaoru, you flirt!~Mat)

Toshiya looked away again, trying not to laugh at him, obviously. He glanced back up at Kaoru. His eyes scanned his face with a small sly smile. Kaoru smirked. Toshiya had done that the first time, he and Kaoru went out on a date. And recently whenever Toshiya did that, he had something in mind. And that something usually included the both of them in a very provocative position together. “I’m fine.” He finally mouthed back. “Die’s a slob though. Shinya and I are always yelling at him to clean up.” It was a very good thing, Kaoru could read lips or he would’ve been totally lost. “And how are you?”

“I miss you.”

Toshiya blushed, happily.

hide held back some laughter, Miyabi hid a smile, and Yuki gave another small chuckle.

Kamijo crossed his legs and this time, he was smirking. Jiro shook his head and stared out the door.

The other members of Toshiya’s team, however, weren’t finding it as amusing as Kaoru’s team was. Kirito glared. Hakuei glared. Sakito stared balefully at Toshiya then back at Miyabi. Full ignored them, wisely. Hisashi played with his hair and eyed hide suspiciously.

Toshiya crossed his legs, revealing the hidden slit on the side. Kaoru almost choked as most of Toshiya’s legs were displayed to everyone in the room. Usually, he didn’t mind when Toshiya did that during photoshoots. It was excusable because he didn’t have to see people staring at his Toshiya. But this was different. He quickly sat on his jealousy and selfishness and focused on Totchi’s face. “I miss you, too, Kaoru.” Toshiya finally replied.

Kaoru’s teammates quickly looked away and tried not to laugh at them. Kaoru rolled his eyes at them, shook his head and sighed. Toshiya gave him an understanding smile. “When are you coming home, Totchi?”

“As soon as you tell me it’s okay for me to come home.”

“What are you saying?”

“You know what I’m saying. You’re not that bad at reading lips, Kaoru.” Toshiya replied.

“I want you to come home now!!” Kaoru began to whisper and made his eyes look as pleading as he could manage. Toshiya fidgeted a bit nervously then shook his head.

“I can’t go home until you tell me what we both need to hear!!” Toshiya replied back in a whisper.

“I told you that I wanted you back home!”

“You haven’t proved your love to me yet! Does that mean you’d rather die than admit you love me? I know you do!!”

“Totchi!!” Kaoru’s whisper turned into a plaintive shout.

Toshiya stood, abruptly and snapped back, “Why can’t you say it? What are you so afraid of?!”

“I’m not afraid of anything, Totchi!!” Kaoru stood up as well, not noticing that Kamijo and hide were tugging on his sleeves, trying to tell him that everyone was staring at them.

Toshiya crossed his arms and glared at him. “Then say it.”

“Say what?” The entire room fell silent. There was that tense feeling one gets before the storm hits. All it needed was something to trigger the rain.

“Wrong answer.” hide muttered.

“Fuck. You. Kaoru.” Toshiya growled out. “You may be a bit blind, but I never thought you could possibly be this stupid.” He wiped at his eyes hurriedly before storming out the door. Kaoru took a deep hissing breath between his teeth. The rest of his team shook their heads in sympathy for him. Hakuei smirked and stood to go after Toshiya. Kaoru was about to follow him but was stopped by hide and Kamijo holding him back.

“What the hell are you doing? He’s gonna—“ Kaoru glared at Hakuei’s back and continued glaring even though he could no longer see the vocalist.

“No, he won’t.” hide replied in a low voice. “Toshiya may be hurt but he knows how to protect himself against Hakuei. He’s not weak, Kaoru. The last thing he needs is for you to go running jealously after Hakuei and starting a fight backstage.”

Kamijo picked up where hide left off, “If you did go after him, he would think that you were only going after Hakuei because of your rivalry with him and not out of love.”

Kaoru sat and shook his head. “Then what the heck am I supposed to do? If I don’t go after him, he’ll think I don’t love him and if I do—“

“You still have the rest of the day, Kaoru.” hide replied. “Besides, we have a cooking competition. You could win him over with your food. Remember that time you cooked him breakfast and when an emergency came up and he couldn’t finish it, he put in a plastic container and ate it later?

Yuki piped up from where he sat, “There’s nothing more romantic than food, Kaoru. Just ask Hiro.” He winked and began to sing the song, ‘Blue Moon.’.

The others began laughing. The last few nights practicing at Yuki’s house had proven interesting and not in the learning-how-to-cook sense. It’s hard to explain here…so let’s take a trip in Kaoru’s memory, shall we?


***********


“Blue moon, you saw me standing alone, without a dream in my heart, without a love of my own…” Yuki sang, twirling one of the wooden spoons in his hands. “But I’m sure he’s out there somewhere…” He muttered and eyed Hiro at the table. Miyabi stopped chopping onions to stare at him with the occasional sniffle. Yuki leaned on the counter and smiled at Hiro, who was speaking to Mayu about something but trailed off when he noticed Yuki staring at him. Hiro blushed and gave a small smile back and tried to continue speaking but he wasn’t really succeeding.

They disappeared into the kitchen and half an hour later, they finally emerged. Kaoru only sighed and said, “Ah, teenage hormones.”


**********


The producer of the show came in, breaking into Kaoru’s memories and disturbing the silence that had descended among the two groups. Hakuei and Toshiya had long come He bowed and introduced himself then began to explain things. “You know the rules, correct? You will have an hour to make a full meal out of the secret ingredient. The host for this show is Sugizo of Luna Sea. We tend to keep each cooking competition show in the same theme—like the night before it was a battle between the members of Morning Musume and Speed and DPS. The host for that was Utada Hikaru. Any questions?”

No one said anything.

“The judges for your competition are Mana, Atsushi, Chirolyn and Ryutaro.”

Yuki whispered something to Kamijo and he passed it along, “Ne, Kaoru…Yuki said that there was supposed to be five judges.”

Kaoru frowned then raised his hand.

“Hai, Kaoru-san?”

“Aren’t there supposed to five judges?”

“Afraid you’re going to lose?” Hakuei said idly.

Kaoru looked up at him, ignoring the way Hakuei’s hand was petting Toshiya’s hair. “No. I just want to make sure this is all fair.” And get your hand off of my Toshiya, you—Kamijo nudged him a bit to keep him from exploding. He turned back to the producer.

“Yes, there are five judges. The fifth judge is a secret and he will only be called on, should your teams reach a tie. Is that all?”

Kaoru nodded.

“Good. I wish all of you luck. Would Kirito’s team please follow me? I will show you where you will enter. I’ll come back for your team later, Kaoru-san.”

As soon as the other team left, Kaoru’s team surrounded him. “Alright, Kaoru, take a deep breath and let it out. Don’t let them get to you.” Kamijo soothed. Kaoru did as he was told, his hands clutching the handles of his chair tightly.

“I’ll kill him,” he muttered, trying to take deep breaths. “Plus Ryutaro is a judge. That’s another advantage on their side…bloody hell.”

“They’re nothing, Kaoru. Toshiya was staring at you the whole time they came back,” Miyabi informed.

“Oh and you only know this because you were staring at him with your tongue hanging out.” Yuki teased. Miyabi scowled at him. Yuki ignored him and moved closer to Kaoru. “You’ll get Toshiya back and if you can’t win him over, we’ll kidnap him and tie him to you!!”

Jiro chewed on his lip, “First, we win this cooking competition. I’m tired of seeing Hakuei and Kirito look so damn smug.”

“Hisashi and you still fighting?” hide asked.

“I’m winning.”

Kaoru turned to Miyabi, “What about you?”

“He’s trying to be nice, but we all know better.”

“It’s war!!” Yuki cheered. The other stared at him and hide gave an amused chuckle.

Kaoru smirked, “Yes, Yuki, it’s a war. And there are three main objectives of this war: One. We win this food competition. Two. We take Toshiya back. Three…” He turned to hide, “Is there a three?”

hide nodded and said, “Three. You prove your love for Toshiya and escape with your life. I can’t believe you forgot about that.”

“I was hoping that we’d take things one at a time.”

“Peachy-pookins, you’ve only got—“ hide took a look at his watch, “An hour and half, you can’t afford to take things one at time!!”

Kaoru growled, “What is with that name?!! Why do you insist on calling me that?! What does that even mean?”

hide reached out and pinched his cheek, grinning, “It means you’re my little Kaoru-chan…my peachy pookins!” He patted Kaoru’s cheek, “Now, stop trying to change the subject. You, boy, are going to gather your balls, go out there and proclaim that you love Hara Toshimasa!!”

Yuki frowned, “I thought he loved Toshiya.”

Kaoru smiled, “No, Yuki, that’s Toshiya’s real name.”

“Oh.”

The producer came back and ushered them to their places, explaining where they were to stand and when they could come out. Fifteen minutes later—they were ready.


*************


1:45 pm


The audience filed into their seats, occasionally speaking with hushed tones. Some of them squealed when they noticed, in the special seats above the kitchen stadium, they saw their favorite Jrocker. Shinya sat next to Die and crossed his legs, then peered over the edge. “Toshiya would be upset if he saw that we were on Kaoru’s side.” Die remarked, conversationally, pretending to find his nails interesting.

“Ah, yes, but he’s being silly. Of course, we would be on Kaoru’s side, he’s our leader and he needs to get Toshiya back. Besides, he’s always got an angel on his side.”

“Is she even here?”

“She’s everywhere, Die. You can’t ignore her, she’s like the common cold.”

Die laughed, “She’ll kill you for that comment.”

Shinya made a face, “I’ve been almost put to death for worse.” He eyed the audience and at the fans staring at them in rapt attention. “Looks like we have to behave ourselves.” Die looked over and smiled.

“Who says?”

“Our manager and publicist.”

“What about fanservice?”

“This isn’t our show, Die—“ Shinya instantly shut up when Hiro’s head appeared with Yukito, his wife, and Kazuki in tow. He gave them a slight bow. All four bowed back and Yukito and Kazuki stared across at the audience, waving a bit and drawing excited shouts. Kazuki beamed then sat next to Die, on his right, and peered over the edge, much like Shinya had been doing it. Hiro sat on Kazuki’s right with Yukito and his wife sitting next to him, completing the row.

“So…has anything happened yet?” Kazuki asked, staring down at the judges table which happened to be under them.

“Not yet…” Die replied.

“Do you know who the judges are?”

“No.”

Conversation was halted again when Takuro made his way up with Emiru, Mayu, Machi and Levin in tow. Emiru sat behind Shinya and poked his head over his shoulder. “Anything happen yet?”

“No.”

“Damn.”

There was a clatter up the stairs and everyone turned. An embarrassed looking Kikasa poked his head into their view. “I’m not late, am I? Nothing started yet right?”

Kazuki shook his head, “No, you’re on time.”

“Hey, look who’s over on Kirito’s side.” Die said. “Looks like…Teru, Kazuki from Sakito’s band, the rest of Pierrot, Dinah, Kyo?! That traitor!!”

“Someone had to stick up for Toshiya.”

“Yeah, I know but still—There’s all of Penicillin and Kiyoshi.”

The lights dimmed and everyone quieted.

A voice was heard saying, “We go live in 5, 4, 3….” The rest was said in silence.

The cameras began to roll, and a figure took his place in the center of the kitchen stadium. A spotlight singled him out.

Pink fuschia hair. Fair skin. A natural confident stance that could come off as arrogant or proud. A smile that could kill millions around the world. Then he bowed and began to speak in a loud clear voice. “Konnichiwa! Today, we’ve gathered the finest musicians in the Jrock music scene to come together to compete for an honorary Iron chef award. Each team has a total of six members with a team leader. Our judges have been carefully picked from among their peers and have come here to see if anything cooked by them is actually edible.” Sugizo made his way to the judges table and Yukito, Hiro, Shinya, Emiru, and Kazuki peered over the edge to get a better view. All they saw was darkness.

“Today’s judges are Atsushi of Buck-Tick.”

A light fell on Atsushi, illuminating him but not enough to make him wince. He inclined his head in response and a few fans screamed in delight when the camera got a nice shot of his dark eyes.

Sugizo went on after that, “Mana-san of Malice Mizer.”

Mana gave a short bow, his blue curls bobbing as he did so. The light that fell on him, seem to make a halo around his head. A few fans screamed for that as well.

“Ryutaro of Plastic Tree.”

Ryutaro smiled shyly and bowed politely, his own flawless hair shifting neatly back into place. And as expected, a few fans screamed out (of course--), “Kawaii!!”

“And Chirolyn, bassist of Spread Beaver, as well as leader of his new band, Chirolyn and the Angels!!” Sugizo made his way past the table, right after he gave Chirolyn a familiar handshake. He looked back up at the camera in front of him, “And now, I shall introduce the teams. They are known to be rivals and today we pit them against each other in the kitchen stadium. On the blue team—“

At that, a curtain rose from one side of the stage revealing six silhouettes, standing in front of a blue background. “From the band Guniw Tools, Full.” Full stepped forward and into the light to the cheers of friends and fans. “From the band, Glay, Hisashi.” Hisashi stepped forward to stand on Full’s right. “From the Indies band, Due’le Quartz, Sakito. From the band, Penicillin, Hakuei. And from the band, Dir en Grey, Toshiya. And the leader of the Blue Team, vocalist of the band Pierrot, please welcome Kirito.” Kirito stepped forward moving past all of them to stand slightly in front of them. They made their way into the kitchen stadium and stood behind their designated counter.

“And on the red team—“ There was another flourish with curtain and the lights. Six silhouettes stood against a deep red background. “Bassist for the band, Glay, Jiro.” He stepped forward and smiled, nodding at his fans enthusiasm. “Guitarist of the band, Due le’ Quartz, Miyabi.” Miyabi stood next to him and smiled, then waved to Kazuki and Kikasa.

Shinya leaned over to poke Die, “Wonder what Totchi thinks about Miyabi…”

“Die, bitch, die?”

Shinya shook his head and sighed as Die laughed softly. Sugizo went on, “From the band, Raphael, Yuki.” Yuki stepped forward and waved cheerfully to everyone then gave a smile to his bandmates. “Kamijo—Lareine. Professional cosplayer of hide, Hikaru.” There was a gasp from the crowd as to how well the cosplayer looked like the real thing. Kazuki was standing up in his seat staring at him and looked like he would almost fall off the railing if Hiro wasn’t holding onto his belt. “And finally, leader of the red team and guitarist of Dir en Grey, please welcome Kaoru.” Kaoru stepped forward and led them down the stairs to stand behind their counter.

Sugizo made his way to the platform where the secret ingredient was covered by red velvet. “Today, you are gathered here to test your skills in the culinary arts.” Miyabi rolled his eyes. Yuki elbowed him with a slight smile. Kaoru glared like a parent. “To make things easier for you, we decided that not everything will be centered on the ingredient, but rather around it. You will be allowed to use meat. And now the secret ingredient!!”

Sugizo took hold of the velvet cover and whipped it off, dramatically. “Tomatoes!!”

Neither side blinked although Yuki paled tremendously.

“Begin!!” Sugizo shouted.

Miyabi didn’t need any more encouragement than that. He took off running to the table and began snatching up as many tomato products as he could. Suddenly, he and Sakito reached for the same tomato—Sakito’s hand falling on Miyabi’s. Sakito’s eyes met Miyabi’s. They froze and stared each other.

Kaoru and the others stared at them. “What the heck are they doing?” Kaoru wondered out loud.

hide glared and snapped out, “OI!! We only have one hour to complete this, Miyapichu!! And fifteen minutes before I snap your neck!! Now quit wasting time falling in love with Sakito again so that To—“ Kaoru slapped a hand over hide’s mouth.The rest was said into his hand and Kaoru winced when hide bit him.

Meanwhile, Miyabi and Sakito were still staring at each other.

Sakito spoke first, “Miyabi—“

Miyabi snarled and snatched the tomato away from him, stealing one from Sakito’s container to add insult to injury and ran back to his team. He placed the tomatoes down on the counter before them and beamed proudly. Sakito stood rooted in his spot, staring after the guitarist as if he had gone insane then remembered where he was and ran back to his team.

Kaoru glanced at all the tomatoes then looked to Yuki. “So, Yuki, what do we do now?” Yuki was still pale as he scratched his fluffy pink hair again nervously. Kaoru frowned, noticing that he was slightly trembling. “Yuki? Daijyoubu?”

Yuki nodded, “Un.”

“So what do we do?”

Yuki bit his lip and shook his head, “I don’t know…” “You don’t know?” Kaoru stared at Yuki incredulously. “Yuki, you have to know! You’re our main chef!!” He glared at the cameraman that got a little too close and snapped, “Do you mind not taping us right now please?!”

“Kaoru, be civil!” Kamijo scolded then began shaking Yuki, in a not so “civil” manner. “What do you mean you don’t know?!!! How will we win this war if you don’t know?!”

Yuki looked as if he were fighting off the urge to wail but obviously failed when his mouth opened, “I don’t!!!! Hiro doesn’t like tomatoes!!!!” The entire team stared at him with shock then cast a glare up at the seats above their side of the kitchen stadium. Hiro blushed and ducked.

Jiro growled, picked up a wooden spoon to throw at the young drummer but was stopped by hide. “I don’t believe this!!” He yelled, flailing the spoon about. Miyabi ducked, just barely getting hit by the spoon. Jiro pointed the spoon in Kirito’s team’s direction. “And they’ve already started!!"

Kaoru turned in time to see Toshiya cutting tomatoes and a whole bunch of other ingredients stacked up next to him. They had given him Miyabi’s job in Kirito’s team. Kirito was already over a pot stirring something. “Shit.” A tap on his shoulder from Sugizo made him spin around again. “Hai?”

“Unfortunately, Kaoru-san, we’ll have to deduct points from your team because one of your members isn’t wearing the correct attire.”

Kaoru gaped at him then took a look at his team.

Yuki. Light pink hair. Apron. Chef hat.

Miyabi. Black hair. Piercings. Apron. Chef hat.

Jiro. Semi-bleached hair. Wooden spoon as a weapon. Apron. Chef hat.

Kamijo. Blonde hair. Strange contacts. Apron. Chef hat.

hide. Bright eyeburning pink hair. Neon green jacket and pants. Apron.

Himself. Apron. Chef hat.

Wait a minute. His eyes swiveled back to hide and looked back to Sugizo. “No!! No, please!! What if we put his chef hat on now?!”

Sugizo shook his head, “I’m sorry, Kaoru-san. Points have to be deducted.”

There was a collective sigh of disappointment from the audience just as Kaoru stalked over to hide, snatched the spoon out of Jiro’s hand and whacked him. “I told you to wear the damn hat!!! What were you—too concerned about messing up your damn hair to put on the hat?!”

“It was an ugly hat!!” hide protested, managing to grab the spoon out of Kaoru’s hand and gave it to Yuki.

“It’s not as if you’ve never worn stupid hats before!!”

“But that has got to be the stupidest!!”

“You could’ve attached bobbly bits to it!! Or even a bit of fringe!!” Kaoru tried not to whine but dammit, this was his team and his war and it was all quickly falling apart. He covered his face with his hands. He was not going to have a break down. Oh no. He was not going to cry. He was Kaoru, the god of Death. He faced the terror of waking Kyo before he was ready to come back to the living world. He faced the terror of Shinya’s sudden destruction of his drumset at practice once. He faced the terror of Die almost dying on him. He fell out of buildings, got shot at and had been kidnapped. He would not cry simply because he was losing his mind over a simple cooking competition. He felt himself cracking just as somebody tugged on his sleeve.

Kaoru looked up, a bit fearfully to see Yuki smiling at him reassuringly. “Um…Kaoru, everything’s not lost yet. I may not know too much recipes that call for tomatoes but I’m sure I can improvise. I’m a good improviser. Just let me sing while we cook and that’ll help me some.”

Kaoru stared at his hands and took a deep breath, hoping that no one would notice the tiny sniffle they heard in front of it. “I suppose it couldn’t hurt. But how is hide—I mean, Hikaru going to make dessert out of tomatoes.”

“Tomato cake.” Miyabi said idly.

Kaoru blinked, “Is that possible?”

Miyabi nodded.

“But what else are we going to make? This has to be a four course meal!!” Kaoru thought for a bit then yelled to Kamijo, “Oi. What do want for dinner?”

“Soup to begin with.” Kamijo replied, instantly. He looked at everyone, snapped his fingers at Miyabi and handed him some tomatoes.

“Oi…you just can’t snap your fingers at me and…” Miyabi’s grumbling died when the camera fell on him. He flashed the camera a smile and placed the tomatoes on the board. “How do you want it?”

“Diced.”

Kaoru turned away from them and looked at Yuki and Jiro. “What do you want for dinner?”

“Sandwiches.”

“Grilled squid.”

“With tomatoes?!” Kaoru asked, a bit confused.

“Hey…you asked me what I wanted for dinner, not what went with it or what should be in it—or whatever!” Jiro replied. Kaoru shook his head and walked over to their fridge and peeked inside. Jiro and Yuki peered in at after him.

“We have beef and we have squid.”

“A hamburger with tomatoes.” Yuki calmly replied and looked at the squid, “And we can make a grilled squid salad if that’s okay with everyone.”

Kaoru reached in and took out the ingredients handing it to Yuki. “We’re not eating it so it doesn’t matter.”

Yuki placed the squid near Miyabi, whose nose wrinkled at the smell. “Here.” Yuki tried not to laugh. “Clean this.”

“Eeewwww….”

“Don’t just stand there and ew….clean it.” Yuki said smirking. Miyabi made a face, putting his tomatoes in the bowl for Kamijo, who was stirring something in a pot. A cameraman peered over his shoulder while the other centered on the cutting board. Miyabi groaned then began to clean the squid, very reluctantly. Kaoru looked over to where hide was. The angel winked at Kaoru, making him curious enough to come over. He peered around hide.

“One cup of butter and two cups of sugar.” hide explained, as if he were a teacher talking to a student. He pointed to the mixer. “I’m creaming them and I have to add the eggs one at a time.”

“Where did you get this information?” Kaoru demanded.

hide cracked an egg on counter then broke it over the metal mixing bowl, watching it as it got blended in with the creamed sugar and butter. “I filched it from Miyapichu’s head. Don’t worry about it though. He doesn’t know what I did and I figured that we wouldn’t have enough time if I simply asked him.” He added another egg into the bowl. “How this’ll actually taste after I’m done, is beyond me. But then again, we’re not eating it so it’s not going to be on our stomachs.”

Kaoru laughed and headed over to Miyabi was now slicing two different types of tomatoes. “How are you doing, Miyabi-kun?”

“Perfect if it hadn’t been for the squid.” Miyabi shuddered, “I thought this was going to be a cool job to do and then he came along with that icky smelling squid.” He finished slicing the tomatoes and separated them into different bowls. Yuki snatched away his tomatoes and rubbed olive oil on them before placing them on a baking sheet. He popped them into the oven after a brief skirmish with hide and his tomato cake. Kaoru sighed at the other two then patted Miyabi on the shoulder. Miyabi went on as he took an onion and began slicing it. “It’s not fair I tell you. But at least, Toshiya and I have the same jobs. I think that’s pretty cool.”

Kaoru smirked, “Oh, are you checking out my Toshiya again?”

Miyabi froze, “No! No! Of course not, Kaoru-san!! Never!! You know me!!”

“Yes, I know you and I know that you just snarled at Sakito up there.”

“He was going to take my tomato!!” Miyabi snapped. Kaoru tried not to laugh.


-elsewhere-


Shinya leaned over the railing, eyeing Miyabi and Kaoru intensely. To others it would look like he was glaring but he wasn’t. Die knew his glare and it wasn’t that. “Shin-chan, what are you doing?”

“I want to know what he’s saying to Miyabi.”

“I never knew you were one to be nosy, Shin-chan. Always thought that was rumored to be my trait.”

“I’m not being nosey, Die. Merely inquisitive. Now, let go of my belt so I can hear them.”

“Shin-chan, if I let go of your belt, you’re going to tumble down over the railing and land onto Mana-san’s lap. Much as that’ll make all of the yaoi fans happy, it will make your boyfriend very upset, now will you please come away from there?”

Shinya grunted in response then said, “Hey…Toshiya’s glaring at Miyabi. Wonder what he’s thinking…”

Die smiled then began to do an impression of Toshiya. “Kaoru—“


“—you jerk!!” Toshiya sniffled out. He hated cutting onions and he hated watching that lookalike get so much attention from his Kaoru. “Bitch, better stay the hell away from my Kaoru.” He muttered out. He took another peek at Kaoru’s side to see Kaoru ruffling Miyabi’s hair then turning back to Yuki and Jiro. Then he wondered why Shinya was leaning so far over the railing. He wiped his eyes with the back of his left hand just as Hakuei came over and began whispering in his ear.

“Now why are you crying, lovely one?”

“Onions, Hakuei. Onions. Now, if you would please excuse me, I have a job to do.”

“You won’t go far with that job if you keep staring over at Kaoru. Why do you insist on being with someone who doesn’t love you?”

“He loves me.” Toshiya hissed, whirling and placing the knife between him and Hakuei dangerously. “He loves me—he just can’t say it in front of other people yet.” He whirled back around before the cameras or Kirito could catch them and went back to chopping onions for the main dish.


-back over to Kaoru’s side-


Jiro and Yuki stood next to each other. Yuki was cooking the five hamburger patties he made and Jiro was currently grilling the squid. But they weren’t really paying attention to that. Their attention lay across to the other side at Toshiya and Hakuei and occasionally at Hisashi. “Ne, Toshiya’s dangerous. Why would anyone want to stay with him?”

Jiro jerked his head to Kaoru, who was blending a chile vinaigrette. “Well, just think that one over there is known to be the god of Death…so they make a perfect match, don’t you think?”

“They’re crazy.”

“Oh, sure and you and Hiro are a match made in Heaven.”

“Don’t disrespect my Hiro.” Yuki flipped the patties over just as Jiro took the squid off of the grill and handed them over to Miyabi to cut in slices. Then he began to grill the onions. “Mind if I sing?”

“It wouldn’t be you cooking if you didn’t sing.”

Yuki grinned happily and let loose with a song. “One day, I was walking down the streets, looking for anything, any surprise—“

Jiro began laughing then began singing along. “Feel like a treasure game on a rainy day.”

“Then it happened suddenly I saw, I saw it and there it was falling—“ hide took over and then they all began singing LemonED I scream. Everyone in the studio either laughed, gave them a strange look or joined in with them. Kaoru shook his head, making sure that everything was being carried out perfectly when he heard:

“YOU HAVE FIFTEEN MINUTES TO GO.”

He almost shrieked at that and looked over everyone’s shoulders. The song went ended and another one began (this time, Misery), heedless of his complaints. The grilled squid was tossed in with the greens, onions and the vinaigrette. Kaoru and Yuki arranged it hurriedly on a platter and took the tomatoes out from earlier, topping the salad with it. hide paced around the kitchen, waiting for his cake to finish. Kamijo began to ladle the orange-red soup into five white bowls. Miyabi handed him a few sprigs of parsley and Kamijo placed one in the middle of each soup bowl, placed them bowls on a small plate and laid them neatly on the counter to the side.

“Miyabi! Can you find and cut us some mint please?” Yuki asked, from across the kitchen.

“Miyabi!! Can you cut me some more onions please?” Jiro asked, taking over the task of making the hamburgers.

“Miyabi, can you—“ Kamijo didn’t even get to finish his sentence.

Again another announcement came, “YOU HAVE TEN MINUTES TO GO.”

Miyabi whirled, the knife in his hand and murderous glint in his eye. Apparently, the pressure became too much for him. He looked at Yuki and Kaoru, to Jiro, to Kamijo and gave a frustrated groan. “AAAGH!!! Hey!! There’s only one of me and five of you!!! Now, let me finish cutting Hikaru’s cake!! Dessert is everything, do you understand?!” He eyed all of them again, adjusting his grip on the knife. Yuki’s eyes widened and he took a step back, bumping into Kaoru despite the fact that if Miyabi would go mad, he and Kaoru were probably the safest. Jiro held up his hands that held hamburger buns in them and gave him an innocent look. Kamijo moved around to the other side of the counter. hide patted Miyabi on the shoulder to calm him. Miyabi growled and went back to cutting the cake, slowly.

Miyabi placed each cake slice onto separate plates for hide, then began looking for the mint to cut for Yuki and the onions for Jiro. Kaoru wondered about Miyabi’s stress then began to wonder how Toshiya was doing.


~*~


Toshiya was pissed.

This is not a good sign for the person in charge of cutting ingredients.

For one thing, Toshiya wasn’t chopping things. He was beginning to hack at them. Every time Kirito demanded something, it got hacked. Every time Hakuei came around, something got hacked. Every time Hisashi demanded something, it got hacked. Every time Sakito, his lookalike’s boyfriend, asked for something, the ingredient died a second death. At least, Full had the decency to ask nicely. For that, Toshiya chopped. Or minced. Or whatever Full wanted.

Full was nice. But then again, Toshiya figured that people who were dessert chefs had to be nice because they were working with sweets and the sweetness tended to rub off on them.

“I hate onions.” He muttered then looked up, over the cameraman’s head to see who was yelling. Miyabi threatened everyone with a knife. Toshiya sniffled again, wiping his eyes with his apron and went back to cutting. He wished he could do that. But how dare Miyabi threaten Kaoru? He had half a mind to go over there and—

“Toshiya!!” Kirito yelled, “Hurry up with the onions!! We only have ten more minutes!!”

“Like I’m a fucking idiot, Kirito!!” He snapped back sarcastically. He could practically hear Kyo cheering him on. He glared at the vocalist. “I heard that too so you just hold onto your undies while I do my job.” You cheapass relationship destroying bastard. He grumbled inwardly, slicing the onions a bit more hurriedly than usual. Even when he was hacking at things, he at least made sure they looked relatively even but the onions were being cut into all different sizes. All I wanted was to do something cool. All I wanted was Kaoru to admit something so we could go on with life. I did not want to be treated like a stupid servant while some lookalike of mine goes off gallivanting all over the place near my Kaoru. And that bastard isn’t even looking at me! Probably not even thinking about me!! Doesn’t care if I—

“K’SO!!!!!!!!!!” Toshiya’s shriek of pain rang throughout the kitchen stadium but that didn’t halt most of the activity. The knife was sharp—he knew that but he didn’t know it could’ve possibly been that sharp. The knife clattered onto the cutting board as Toshiya hurriedly reached for a dish towel, trying not to bleed over the onions that he had been cutting. He bit his lip as the pain began to increase as well keep time with his pulse. He grabbed the slices of onions and shoved them hurriedly into a bowl and slid it to Kirito, then began to concentrate on his left hand. Stupid Toshiya. Stupid stupid…

“YOU HAVE FIVE MINUTES TO GO.”


~*~


Kaoru’s eyes widened at the scream and before he knew it, he was moving over to the other side of the kitchen stadium, right after he reached into Miyabi’s apron pocket for the gauze and bandages that he had put there for himself before the show began. Miyabi was known to be reckless with a knife. Kaoru hadn’t known that Toshiya had that problem too until now.

Kaoru gently turned Toshiya around, taking the wounded finger into his hands and began cleaning it. It was as if there were no cameras on them, no competition going on around them…no threat of death hanging over him. Kaoru began to speak softly as he continued cleaning the blood off. “Toshiya. Beautiful Toshiya, look at what you’ve gotten yourself into again.”

“I’ve done nothing.” Toshiya murmured back, letting Kaoru baby him.

Kaoru smiled, fondly, “Mmhmm.” He took out the bandage, unwrapped it and placed it gently on Toshiya’s wound. He secured it then brought Toshiya’s bandaged finger to his lips, giving it a gentle kiss. “I told you not to do something like this when you were angry, Totchi.”

“I know,” the bassist said, meekly.

“Mou daijyoubu desu…” He patted Toshiya's hand then looked up into Toshiya’s eyes. The other man was slightly blushing. “Totchi, gomen ne? For the whole week?” Toshiya nodded. Kaoru smiled again, taking the dishcloth away from Toshiya and placed it on the counter, but still held onto Totchi’s hand.

“YOU HAVE THIRTY SECONDS LEFT.” Came a voice out of nowhere but Kaoru barely heard it but Totchi looked up at it with a fearful expression.

“Arigato, Kaoru.”

“It’s nothing, Totchi.”

“Daisuki, Kaoru.” Totchi whispered, still aware that the cameras and microphones were on them as well as being surrounded by many other people. Kaoru smiled again, cupping Toshiya’s face in his hands. Toshiya looked up at him, expectantly, eyes widening as Kaoru moved closer to him. “K-Kaoru…what about—“

Kaoru’s lips were a breath away from Toshiya’s just as he murmured, “Aishiteiru, Totchi. Zutto aishiteiru.” Kaoru’s lips met Toshiya’s gently yet briefly as if realizing that he only had a few seconds left. Or that he had none left.

Cameras zoomed in.

People screamed in happiness or shock.

Over on Kaoru’s side, Yuki, Jiro and Miyabi had been washing dishes. They were tossing knives, spoons and dishes that couldn’t break into the sink. Jiro accidentally misjudged and a knife richoted off the sink. Kamijo jumped and hid behind a silver platter. The knife richoted off of that, then hit the refrigerator.

Kaoru pulled away from Toshiya with a smile. Toshiya looked dazed for a second then his eyes widened, when he saw the incoming threat. “Kaoru!! Look out!!” Kaoru stared at Toshiya incomprehensively, frozen to the spot. Toshiya swore at him then turned him as quickly as he could. They were thrown off balance and hit the floor, Toshiya falling on top of him. Toshiya gave another painful cry, collapsing against Kaoru.

“T-Totchi?”

There was no answer.

“Toshiya—answer me please?!!” Kaoru moved underneath the taller man, trying to see if Toshiya was hurt or if—he stopped that thought before it could even begin. “Totchi….no, Totchi!! Please say you didn’t!!” Kaoru held the still body of his lover delicately, as if he was afraid he would break.

Lovely Toshiya. Blue and black hair.

Expressive brown eyes. A tendency to pause in mid-walk in the middle of a bass solo with the cutest look of concentration on his face.

A laugh that could cheer anyone and a smile that could melt the iciest soul.

“Totchi…” Kaoru whispered, holding him close, afraid to let him go to anyone even though he knew that soon he would have to. “You’re the best lover I ever had.”

“Had?” Came a muffled voice, “HAD?!!”

Kaoru gave a shaky smile. “Uh oh…”

Toshiya pushed Kaoru away from him, clutching his right bicep. A few drops of blood were seen on his fingers, soaking a bit onto his bandage and he glared at Kaoru. “HAD?!! What happened?! I was gone for a few days and you manage to find a new lover?! Already planning to dump me, eh?”

Kaoru gave him another nervous smile, “Ne, ne, Totchi!! Don’t get upset!!”

“Don’t get upset?!! Boy, when we get home—“

“Can’t we talk about this later, Totchi? We’re in front of all these people and your voice is really getting loud—“

“—I am chaining you to the bed and I won’t let you out until Monday and you’ll barely be able to walk, you rat bastard!” Toshiya let go of his arm and reached out for Kaoru with both hands and began choking him. “You’re mine, understand?!! MINE!!!”

Kaoru gagged, “O-okay!! T-Toshiya….”

hide walked over, “CUT! And you had two seconds!!” He eyed the couple with a complete expression of surprise. Kaoru made a face at him, trying to get him to stop the other man.

“TIME HAS EXPIRED.” Came the voice and hide scowled.

“My watch is better than their watch!!” Kaoru made another sound that sounded like he was saying Gackt’s name if you said it how it was spelled. He tried to get hide’s attention but it was no use.

“--you—I’m going to kick your ass when we get home! What the hell is the matter with you!” Toshiya gave Kaoru one last shake and let him go. Kaoru dramatically fell against the floor, one hand flung over his forehead. Toshiya snorted, crossed his arms and looked away but winced when his hand encountered the knick he received from the flying knife.

hide gave Toshiya dish towel and the bassist pressed it up against his wound. Kaoru’s teammates hovered around him and picked him up. “You two have got to be one of the most strangest couples I have ever had the misfortune to come across.” He remarked.

Full helped Toshiya up and took them back to their group. He shook his head and casually remarked, “I really hope that doesn’t go on over at your house all the time…I’d hate to come over for dinner with the knowledge that I might possibly die…” Toshiya gave a laugh then smirked at Kaoru, giving him a tiny little wave that hinted at evil.

Yuki and the others escorted Kaoru over to the judges table and lined up in their respective places. “Now, we’ll see if our food has won over Toshiya.”

Kaoru rubbed his neck thoughtfully and winced, “Trust me, Yuki…after all this, I think it would be better if Toshiya didn’t taste our food.”


**********


Two teams stood stoically on either side of the judging table. Assistants poured in and began to assemble Kirito’s team’s dishes in front of the judges.

“It had been a most lively competition with the hide cosplayer Hikaru leading Kaoru’s team in not one but two songs, a touching moment between Kaoru and Toshiya of Dir en Grey—“ Both men blushed considerably, “—and a near death experience with the same two men. But now it all comes down to what really matters. The food. The judges will first comment on Kirito’s team then rate them on presentation, taste, and creativity. The total amount of points that a team will receive will be twenty points. And now—the judging."

The rest of Sugizo’s commentary faded into the background. Kaoru had been standing patiently and behaving until he caught someone’s eyes from across the table. Toshiya smirked at him, rather proudly. Kaoru glanced around him then mouthed to him, “Oh, God, not now, Totchi.”

“Why not now?”

“Because…Totchi! There are cameras around us!”

Toshiya pouted at him the mouthed, “It didn’t matter to you a few minutes ago.”

“But…”

“What was that you said? ‘Aishiteiru, Totchi. Zutto aishiteiru.’ Don’t you think I’ve forgotten that.” Toshiya beamed proudly.

Kaoru made a noise between clenched teeth as Toshiya glanced around, made sure no one was watching then blew him a kiss. Kaoru could just imagine himself as an anime character with a huge sweatdrop. “Totchi! You’re evil now behave!!”

“Behave? What’s that? And besides, it’s no fun to behave around you!! I still have to teach you a lesson about thinking of leaving me!”

Kaoru glared at him but Totchi only smiled wider. Kaoru tried not to give in, “I told you there was no one! Only you! And besides, you left me first!!”

“Bah! I never left you, I just—“ Toshiya seemed to be searching for a word.

“HA! You left me! No bones about it—you left me—poor sweet doomed Kaoru to—“

“Stop being melodramatic, I never left you at all! Besides you were only worried because there was no one to make sure you looked good before you left to go anywhere in the morning and because there was no one to cook you breakfast!”

“Lies! All lies!!” Kaoru returned.

“You probably thinking of leaving me for Miyabi! Well, I understand! He’s younger and he’s—“

“Yakamashi, Totchi!!” Toshiya’s eyes widened at that and Kaoru went on, “He’s not you!! He doesn’t have what you have!”

“What do I have, Kaoru?” Toshiya asked, with an impish glint in his eye.

“Legs.” He blurted out as it was the first thing that came to mind.

“Is that all you care about?!!!”

“No! Totchi! Besides, he has a crush on you!”

Toshiya’s mouth fell open at that then finally he replied, “But I thought he was going out with Sakito?”

“That’s what he says and I’m sure he does love him but there’s something he still has for you.”

The bassist’s eyes widened again and he smiled. “Ooh, well then it looks like I have someone to talk to.”

“Totchi!!”

“Ooh, what? Scared that I’ll steal your boyfriend?”

“Totchi, he’s not my boyfriend! You are!!” Kaoru was about to say more until a painful nudge in the ribs from hide, jolting him back into awareness of what was really going on. Kaoru looked away from Toshiya to Sugizo then to the four judges. Please, he begged, Let it not be a tie…I don’t think I could take that.

“With the final score of seventeen barely beating out the challenger’s score by a a close score of sixteen points!!” Sugizo paused dramatically. Kaoru spotted Yuki, unconsciously twisting his apron up in his hands. He reached over behind hide to pat his shoulder and Yuki only grinned nervously.

“The red team led by Kaoru of Dir en Grey wins it!!”

Kaoru’s mouth fell open in shock and an excited shout from Yuki brought him out of it. Yuki had jumped into hide’s arms, yelling happily. Kaoru began laughing as Yuki’s band mates began made their way out of their seats to celebrate with him. Yuki patted hide’s hair apologetically for his sudden outburst and slid down out of his arms to launch himself at his band mates. Miyabi beamed proudly as Kikasa, Sakito and Kazuki made his way over to him, congratulating him but not before Sakito felt the sting of Miyabi’s taunts. Kamijo made his way rather sedately over to Mayu but everyone could tell that he would rather run then walk over while Jiro made faces at Hisashi, who looked like he throw something at the bassist soon enough.

“Surprising…I thought we’d actually lose.” Kaoru admitted to hide. “Um…do you know what would’ve happened if I hadn’t said what I said to Totchi?”

“Hmm…sure you want to hear this?” hide asked, eyeing Sugizo and Chirolyn, the same way they were eyeing him. He narrowed his eyes at them then made a face and turned back to Kaoru. Kaoru nodded. “Well, let’s just say that if you ignored Toshiya’s cry of pain and thought that your cooking was too important to let go, you would’ve been standing in front of the refrigerator. The knife would’ve hit you through the back and pierced your heart. Your life would’ve been stolen from you as well as Toshiya.”

Kaoru shuddered, “I didn’t want you to be that explicit!!”

“You asked.”

“So—but hide—how do you know if I—“ Before Kaoru could finish that sentence, Toshiya glomped him and squeezed tightly. “T-totchi!!”

“Kaoru!!”

Die ran up, doing the exact same thing as Toshiya but with a little flounce at the end of it, “Kaoru!!!”

“Ack! Die!!”

“No, Die!! My Kaoru!!”

“No, Totchi!! My Kaoru!!”

Kaoru twisted around trying to get one of them if not both of them to let him go so that he’d be able to breathe easier. “hide!! hide, help!!” Kaoru looked around for the angel but couldn’t find him. “hide!! How could you leave me when I need you?!!”

From the railing of the seats above Kaoru’s side of the kitchen stadium, two angels sat. One with dark red hair and another with bright pink hair. The pink haired one opened a bottle of champagne and poured some into a champagne glass and handed it over to the red haired one. She took it graciously, giving him a slight nod of her head and he looked at the bottle. “Tequila!!” He ordered.

Her eyebrow rose.

hide smirked and poured the tequila that was once champagne into his own glass. They toasted and both took a sip of their respective drinks. They looked over at their humans and smiled. “Ungrateful humans…you give them a finger and they want your whole arm.”

“Maybe next time we should let them die.”

“Ah, yes and watch us get our butts kicked.”

“It was a nice thought though.”

“Yes. Nice.” Manami took a sip of her champagne and her eyes narrowed at hide. “And what did we tell you about drinking?”

“Never do it while I’m on duty.” hide drained everything in the glass and poured himself some more. “And my duty finished a couple minutes ago. I have three days to kick back and have some fun.”

An envelope appeared between them, slightly glowing and kind of warm. hide stared down at it, frozen, with the glass still pressed up near his lips. He stared at Manami.

She gave him a wink and took a sip of champagne. “You were saying?”

“GAH!”


End of part 4b

To be continued



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