"Magical thinking: The feeling that one's thoughts or actions have the ability to cause actions or effects that would defy the normal laws of cause and effect."
-Taber's Cyclopedic Medical Dictionary; Edition 20
"Israel; the de-facto 51st State of the USA."
-Moustafa Hous Bin Farteen
"Disbelief in the self disarms all of the other delusions."
-Buddhist saying
"I saw all the games that you played. Still, into your mousetrap I did stray."
-Tuscadero (from "Game Song")
<I tried to evict the rant machine, since I need more room to absorb medical and psychiatric terminology. But Eris "persuaded" me otherwise. (I have no willpower when bribed with tequila.) So I am allowing the little neurosis factory to continue, at least until I can find a way of throwing a wrench into it. Joy for you, right?>
Where is your sense of humor? Have you lost it through the holes in your pocket? Or did you lose it that day you misplaced Jesus? Perhaps you lost it during the chaos of the night you drank three gallons of rum. Perhaps you lost it that week you spent in Vegas as the Good Reverend Elvis? It could be that you have simply misplaced it somewhere underneath your bed, along with all the other things that your hypertrophied defense mechanisms have shoved there unwittingly. Don't worry much about it. Your sense of humor comes back as easily as your shadow, if you let it.
We are living in a world in which everyone is more or less psychotic. It's just that some people have enough power to force their versions of psychoses upon the rest of us to the point that they become the template through which we feel and think. When some people realize this, sometimes they figure that they need to rebel, but their minds, trained on psychoses can only become a mirror image of their object of hatred. Don't kid yourselves. Most of us are in that straight in some form or another. You can blame or mistrust the psychotherapists (or whatever version of clergy you prefer) who claim to be able to help you through your psychoses, but many of them are just trained to help you function in a psychotic society. You may be lucky enough to find one of them who knows the game and can help you achieve the autonomy you are seeking. But on the day that happens (if or when; take your pick), you may wish to keep that little nugget of information to yourselves, since "society is everywhere in conspiracy against intelligence."
Some of you will no doubt claim that the following meander about de-conditioning is an attempt to tell you what Discordianism is or isn't and then say something that betrays your narcissism. (But the following contains no definitions of Discordianism. So if you hallucinate them, it's your choice.) Keep believing in and focusing all your whore-ship on yourself. (The "self" is the post-modern version of God anyway, so it is only normal to do so.) De-conditioning from all of the psychoses and from all of your responses and defenses (neuroses) is a torturous process that takes years. It takes metaphysical and psychological confrontation with all aspects of your deepest felt assembly points in your identity. It overthrows the pantheon you have inside and allows you to cut your way out of the cocoon and transform into the being you may be, for some reason, afraid to be. Your beliefs cannot help you, and they will struggle to maintain their hold over the way you view things.
If you do not brainwash yourself, someone else, or some part of society, is brainwashing you. The trick is to use the techniques of brainwashing to allow yourself to explore all reality tunnels, or as many as you can find or as many as you can find useful. Others may think you are strange or stupid, because you no longer want to be as limited and narrow-minded as they are. (And you already know this to some extant.) But you will meet others who will understand you. The ability to choose differing paradigms and belief at will is simply the exercise of free thinking. (It also helps to build up a practice of empathy.) It keeps you from thinking too highly of yourself, because you yourself know which reality tunnels are your own favorites and so cannot begrudge anyone else who is stuck in them for most of their life. Perhaps they know a thing or three about themselves that you don't. Think about it; it's not that much of a stretch.
You can go on ahead and choose to believe that this world is hopeless, but try to make sure that that is what you really believe, and not some sort of twisted sense of holding the universe hostage for not giving you exactly what you wanted. (And remember that the universe is not your fricken wet-nurse.) Likewise, vice versa.
Be as weird or as different as you wish to be, but you may see the usefulness in keeping any abnormalities to yourself. Or you may see otherwise. (You may want to think about the fact that the more people who know who or how you really are may limit your possibilities if you are not careful.) And try not to cry too loudly when the eggshell of your ego cracks apart. (It's entropy, remember?) You could look on the bright side of it all. Once the eggshell is cracked into pieces, you can both grow up finally and not have to worry about tiptoeing around softly. (Though someone will have to clean up the mess.)
It is better to worship false idols than to believe in their reality. It's better to be a capitalist than to spend time squabbling against the other capitalists. It's better to seek therapy than to pretend you are an anarchist. It's better to enjoy life than to sacrifice it all for a cause. It's better to experiment with the various techniques of self-brainwashing than it is to let someone do it to you unknowingly. It is better to call yourself a Discordian and not be able to explain it, than to seek understanding of it. It is better to drink to create problems than it is to drink to escape problems. (Though you may be sorry.) Better to live and have been sorry than to not have lived at all. (Otherwise how else do you learn how to grab happiness?) It is better to wander around the earth alone than it is to be accompanied by those who choose stupidity. During traffic jams, it is better to twiddle your thumbs than to try to get ahead of the other drivers. (Unless you can switch cars. And herein is an occult truth so powerful and subtle that if you realized it, you could throw away all of your Crowley and Starhawk books.)
It may just be dangerous to be weird, odd, or unusual. So suck it up and get on with it. Nothing in life that is worth experiencing is without danger. If you think you'll lose your mind after breaking out of your cocoon, then at least console yourself with the fact that you can always find your sense of humor- no matter how long it takes for you to exhume it.
-Irreverend Hugh, KSC
August 17th, 2005
Rant 119
Rants Vol. 2 Index