[Pay attention. I could be talking about you, America.]
[Second attention. To those of the Discordian Society, I wrote this because Discordianism is getting watered down and becoming the same damned thing as any other "alternative" thing. We need to take back our confidence and our aggressiveness and stop hiding our wishy washiness behind the idea of "inconsistency". Inconsistency was meant to be used in a context.]
After nearly five years of the Bush regime, we are still here. Discordianism has survived and weathered crypto-fascist regimes before. Some of you are too young to remember the 12 years of Reagan and Bush Sr. If there was a time when society in America became nasty and filled with idiotic flag waving and "anything goes so long as it's red white and blue" lunacy, it was then. If any time could be pointed to as the time when Americans gave up being Americans and sided with patriotic fascism, it was then. The generation of swine was celebrating their usurpation of political power and Jesus Christ became popular once again (this time without his motorbike or his hippy haircut). Iraq was invaded and bombed (though that time it was punishment for a little thing called Kuwait). Muslim fanatics were blowing up shit around the world and hebephrenic leadership of the USA was the rule of thumb. Many feared that the Christians were getting out of control with their big Satanic Scare crises. (Any of you remember the talk shows back then?) And the word "liberal" became a filthy swear word which equated to
"selfish-baby-killing-feminist-bleeding-hearted-america-and-god-hating-slime-bag." Any talk of social services was branded as extremist. Any talk of living wages was considered hopelessly utopian. (Hopelessly utopian? Workers 'expecting' to be able to be paid fairly?) A person could get shot for even associating with prairie squid. And possession of pictures of Bob Dobbs would get you placed in the lunatic ward with your monthly poptart allowance cut off permanently. (We won't even talk about what happened to those Discordians who got caught reverencing Eris.) Anyone who had money was inculcated to hate those who had no money. Those with little or no money were despised and hated as criminal breeding welfare scammers who were a menace to western civilization and God while preachers rode around in six-digit cars high on pure cocaine shipped directly from the upper class ghettoes of Colombia.
Those were some of the symptoms and signs of the times back then. Nowadays, what do we have? Much of the same going on but with different labels. Nowadays some things are the same: Being poor and dark skinned is still not healthy. (Look at Hurricane Katrina and the debacle that followed.) Being poor and light skinned will get such people nothing but more invisibility since they are not supposed to exist, and when they are acknowledged they are made fun of as trash. Being poor in general is still unhealthy in a land of so-called equality under the law. Anyone who questions the government's policies are derided as extremists or as haters of America. Unlike the past, Christianity has cleaned up its image (no more rich preachers high on blow - back to torturing children away from public view) and now is fighting legal battles to acquire the right to force you to believe in their heavenly spiel. They are actually more of a threat now then they have ever been in this country. Americans have been properly inculcated to hate swarthy-looking middle easterners and soldiers are in Iraq again (this time not even for any justifiable reason) getting blown up and shot, fighting for something that only exists in the mind of Bush Jr. The once strong opposition to this crap which was the embodied in the Democratic party, has now been whittled away, as that party's spine dissolves in the face of the
"it's-okay-so-long-as-they're-waving-the-red-white-and-blue." Taxes are skyrocketing as the level of infrastructure and social services (you know, the justification for having government in the first place) plummets. (Hell, you can't even get your prairie squid checked-up at the local clinics anymore, unless you're willing to sacrifice your children to the god known as the War on Some Terrorists.) Free thought is derided as a threat to faith and faith is seen as the glue that holds the ailing seriously damaged Republic together. And THAT is not a good sign at all, people. "Don't worry that you work for six dollars an hour and can't pay your rent let alone buy anything to eat, just have faith" they say. Any of you history-minded people remember what openly fascist governments used to say to their citizens?
The American Republic, one of the first large scale experiments in democratic societies ever attempted, is being devoured by fascists and flushed down the toilets even as you sit here and read this. (Don't worry if you aren't living in the USA at this time, since you fucking well know that Bush and his brigade have pledged to deliver America right to your doorstep...especially you Europeans who are now all learning to speak English.)
I thought that by FIRING you, it would be a wake up call. (Remember I or actually WE fired you (I was just the one who delivered the notice) back in November after some of you actually went and CHOSE Bush to be president again.) A long time ago, I actually thought you had a spine and would actually care about the job of freedom. A job which YOU volunteered to take. Remember that time? I was reluctant to give you the task. I cited all of the pitfalls and dangers and fuck-ups and distractions. I warned you about the perils of getting addicted to meth and the whore it came with. I told you not to listen to the hidden fascists as they bought your complacency in exchange for cheaper bananas and gasoline and beer. I warned you that you could be derided, insulted, spit upon, beaten, locked up, tortured, and even killed for fighting for freedom. You just looked at me and said "bring it on." After the performance review, I fired you, thinking you would shape up and actually grow the spine you needed to GET ANGRY or at least do something. Now I see I was mistaken. Please take your standard issue revolver and shoot yourself in the head so we can save our agents' time and money. We will find others to take up the task, unless Wal-Mart has already gotten to them first.
Goodbye American Republic. It was a nice try. The Company (you know, those of us from all over who were fighting for freedom) is now bankrupted by your antics. We are not reorganizing. I myself am going back to my own people, the Celts, who can be trusted to fight for freedom, since they have been doing it for the past several hundred years, no matter how many battles or wars they have lost and no matter the toll exacted. As the Gaels used to say even back when they had a prosperous and well maintained free society, "Better to be dead than to be a fat slave." (Is fearr a bhi marbh na bhi nad' thráill ramhar.) As long as I have to live in Fat City, I will SNAFU everything that comes across my path. It is just deserts upon those who have had freedom and yet chose to be slaves. 3000 years (much of it a struggle) of my freedom-loving ancestors demand it. Almost 3172 years of Discordianism compels it. And I wouldn't have it any other way.
Don't think that because the Company has dissolved that the struggle is over. It has merely metastasized. You think it's impossible to fight this way? Look into history, specifically at a small island known as Crete. The Cretans didn't have the benefit of any organized resistance or of any Company of people that fought for freedom. (Though there may have been some Discordians among them.) When the Nazis sent their elite paratroopers into Crete, what did the Cretans do? They didn't cower and hide and whine about how undefended they were, or about how hopeless it was to fight the largest fascist war machine ever devised. You know what they did? They went after every Nazi paratrooper they could find and attacked them. Out of 8000 elite crack-force paratroopers, over three thousand were killed by peasant farmers who weren't going to sit and take shit from anyone. More were captured and beaten. The head of the supposed occupation force was kidnapped and given over to the allies.
The Nazis eventually had to abandon their plans to hold onto Crete. Let's raise our glasses to those Cretans. They stood and delivered. (Unlike much of Europe, besides the British, the Russians, the Jewish ghetto holdouts in Poland, and the Bretons who fought until the end.) That spirit is what made American society great whenever it was great. That is the spirit that animates the Discordian Society. Take no shit from anyone. Disobey, no matter the threatened hardship or the cost. It is something to think about even as we witness the ripping apart and silencing of the ailing body of what was once American Democracy in a pool of dazzling gadgets and entertainment. Satisfaction guaranteed has replaced free thought. Family values have replaced conscious living. And praying to Jesus is replacing science and medicine. This is the State of the Republic in which we live.
Enemies of freedom, whether you always hated freedom and/or those who are different from you or whether you simply sold your own human birthright of freedom for some pathetic comforts, wherever you are, we will give you no peace of mind until there is justice for this colossal fuck up. Operation Mindfuck is now going to hit the ground running. Human SNAFUs, get your wits about you and get out there. It is time to show some of these wasted potentials what backbones are all about.
Now, back to your regularly scheduled antics.
-Irreverend Hugh, KSC
[Under the influence of the rant machine, which I let out of the cage periodically for some perspective.]
September 25th, 2005