Eris Speaks To Me In A Dream


One night, after a day of fever and stomach flu (hey, just the facts - no romanticized accounts here), I had a curious dream. All I can remember is that I was in a huge, dimly-lit auditorium, and the B-52s were performing.


The next day, I was thumbing through the latest issue of Details, when I saw a little blurb that had Fred Schnieder (frontman of the B-52s) responding to a series of inkblots. Hmm......


That afternoon, I saw a promo for that evening's episode of Politically Incorrect, which was featuring such distinguished guests as......Fred Schnieder! Now I was sure. This was no ordinary coincidence - this had to be a direct communication from the Goddess Herself. (Sure, she could have just spoken to me in an etherial voice and Fred could have gone about his business, but She works in mysterious ways.)


I eagerly awaited the episode. I weighed each of Fred's words carefully, wondering what The Message was going to be. He didn't get a chance to say much - the other guests were Jay Leno, some guy from Nightline, and an actress from The Cable Guy, all very outspoken. Fred mostly just sat there, looking groovy in his colored specs, tin-tin hair flip, and soul patch. I was beginning to lose faith! But, at the end of the show, Fred spake and said:


and I was enlightened....