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| Buckle your seat belts, put on your helmets...It's time for America's favorite sport.... |
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FORD BASHING!!!! |
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Ashes to ashes,
Dust to dust,
If it weren't for FORDS,
Our tools would rust. |
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How is a golf ball different from a FORD?
You can drive a golf ball 200 yards!! |
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FORD: At least they circled the problem. |
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| One teenage boy says to another "My folks just bought me a brand new Ford Mustang." To which the second boy replies "DAAAAMN...what'd you do that pissed 'em off?" |
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Speed Kills.
Drive a FORD.
Live FOREVER. |
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How much wood can a FORD truck haul?
As much as the Chevy Tow-truck can pull. |
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Those that say they'd rather push a Ford than drive a Chevy, usually DO. |
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Why did the chicken cross the road?
To push his F-150 back into the shop. |
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| A Texan was talking big in a bar one night about how much money he had, and how much land he owned. A younger man, growing tired of all the big talk, finally asked "Just how much land do you actually own?" The Texan tipped back his hat, and said "Well Sonny, let me put it to you like this. I can get in my truck at sunrise, drive all day long, skip lunch, and still not get to the other side of my property by nightfall." The young man shot back quickly- "I know what you mean, I used to own a Ford truck too!" |
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How do you double the value of a Pinto? Fill it with gas. |
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Have you seen the new speed limit signs?
"Maximum speed limit- 65 miles per hour. Fords, do the best you can." |
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What does the GT stand for on a Mustang? Glued together!! |
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| From the past ten years, about 90% of Ford trucks are still on the road. The other 10% made it home. |
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Why are Ford dealers giving away Doberman puppies with the purchase of a new truck?
So the owners will have some protection as they walk home. |
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How come FORD makes tractors, and Chevy doesn't?
Chevy can't get one to run that slow! |
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There is going to be a new feature on all new Ford trucks! A magnetized bumper...to pick up all the pieces that fall off. |
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When country singer Alan Jackson sings "...I'd buy a Ford truck or two..." It's b/c he needs a spare. (Hehe..maybe they should consider using the song "I go out walkin' after midnight...") |
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What would you have if you had 100 Ford trucks, and one Chevy?
A junkyard with a tow-truck. |
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FORD ACRONYMS:
Flip Over, Read Directions
Favorite Of Redneck Drivers
Fast Only Rolling Downhill
Forfeit On Race Day
Factory Ordered Road Disaster
Factory Ordered Rebuilt Dodge
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Road Dead
Four Old Rusted Doors
Fixed On Race Day
Flamed Out Road Death
For Only Repugnant Drivers
Flipped Over Russian Dune-buggy
Found On Russian Dump
Ford Owners Recommend Dodge
Funky Old Road Dog
Found On Railroad Deserted |
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