The Sarcophagus Is Shut

When we last left, the Dynamic Duo had been captured by the malevolent monarch of the Nile, King Tut. They had been staked out and left to die in a simulated Egyptian Desert.

It was ten o’clock in the morning as Batman and Robin soaked in their own sweat. The merciless parabolic halogen heaters arrayed strategically around the heroes were thoroughly baking them.

“Robin, are you making any progress?” his partner inquired.

“No. My hands and feet are starting to ache and I can’t reach the blades in my gloves!”

“Neither can I,” Batman replied. “The bindings must be shrinking.

“At the moment, our greatest danger is dehydration. The more we exert ourselves, the more water we will lose. We need to enter a trance and slow down our breathing, while we wait for an opportunity to present itself.”

“Okay,” Robin answered.

Several hours later, shadows flickering across Robin’s face stirred him from his trance. Egyptian vultures were gathering overhead, positioning themselves for a feast. Batman emerged from his reverie as well.

Both knew that the vultures would not try to approach while they were still living. So, they returned to their trances.

Sometime later, the sound of voices brought them out of their slumber. Beyond the circle of hellish heaters, they could see that the sun was starting to go down.

“Okay, Brent,” said a young woman. “Activate the radio-transmitter we need to find our Egyptian grasshopper mouse.”

“You got it,” Brent replied.

The voices were coming from behind a nearby, high, sand dune, but as close as they were, they might as well have been on the moon, for dehydration restricted the Dynamic Duo’s calls for help to barely audible rasping whispers. The heaters operated soundlessly and it was not yet dark enough for their glow to be noticeable at a distance. The voices started moving away from the spread-eagled pair . . . .

Robin suddenly started tapping his fingers on the sand, in a most unusual pattern.

Half a minute later, the voices and the bleeping of a radio-transmitter grew louder. As Robin continued his tapping, the bleeps came closer and closer. Batman observed a small mouse scurry up to his protégé’s fingers and sniff the surrounding area. The mouse had just started to leave when two figures crested the dune.

“What the heck?!” said the girl.

“What is this set-up?” asked Brent.

“Look!” said the co-ed., pointing beyond the circle of heaters. “It’s Batman and Robin!”

“They’re in trouble!” observed Brent.

The astonished students ran down the dune and pushed aside a couple of the heaters. Soon they cut Batman and Robin free and gave the Dynamic Duo some much-needed water.

After thanking the students – and signing autographs for the young woman – the heroes accepted a ride back to the campus of Gotham State University and the Batmobile.

Once they were alone in their vehicle, Batman asked Robin, “What did you do back there?”

“When I heard what those students were tracking, I thought that if I could imitate the vibrations of a desert grasshopper, I might attract the Egyptian grasshopper mouse for which they were looking and lead them to us. Luckily, I remembered the pattern from my studies in connection to the Egyptian Flora and Fauna Project in college."

“Remember, Robin, we make our own luck. Your diligent study has been rewarded. A good education is an important tool in any crimefighter’s arsenal.” Usually, Robin was the one who learned from his mentor, Batman, but he was pleased that on this occasion, the mentor had learned from the student.

Barbara Gordon was naturally distressed to witness Lieutenant Mooney’s kidnapping. As Batgirl, she enjoyed a special bond with the policewoman. Not only were they colleagues, but they had become good friends. In addition, Catwoman had an outstanding threat on Lieutenant Mooney’s life.

Once back at her apartment, it hadn’t taken long for Barbara to determine where Catwoman had obtained the bottle of Wild Tigress perfume. Now she was running a program that cross-checked the store with known and likely Catwoman hideouts. A beep from her computer signalled that it had found a match.

The program came up with Femme Fatale Cosmetics, Inc., a recently liquidated company situated at Thirteen Nine Lives Lane. Barbara e-mailed the information to her father, Commissioner Gordon, with a request that he inform Batman.

The lovely librarian then underwent her tantalizing transformation into Batgirl. She got onto her Batgirlcycle and drove off to investigate Catwoman’s suspected hideout.

She hid the Batgirlcycle in an alleyway behind Thirteen Nine Lives Lane and approached the building. Her arrival did not go undetected. A hidden camera revealed her every move as Catwoman and her minion watched.

“Eenie, implement alternative plan C,” the villainess ordered.

Batgirl scaled the building and found an open skylight. Looking down inside the building, she saw Eenie. On the wall beside the henchwoman, she could see a woman’s body inside one of Catwoman’s notorious bondage bags.

“When Catwoman returns, the fun can begin. I know you are looking forward to that,” Eenie said mockingly to the woman in the bag.

Although it was impossible to make out the face of the person inside, Batgirl drew the obvious conclusion. ‘Diana.’

Batgirl eased her body through the skylight and dropped to the ground behind her adversary. “I’m cancelling your fun, Eenie!” she boldly proclaimed. “You are under arrest. You might as well come quietly.”

“I think not,” Eenie retorted. “Once I’ve subdued you, we can have twice the fun!”

The two enemies circled each other, looking for an opening. Eenie was the first to act. She lunged at the Delectable Detective.

Unfortunately for Catwoman’s first lieutenant, she broke a heel and stumbled out of control towards Batgirl. Capitalizing on Eenie’s misfortune, Batgirl thrust a flattened palm into the brunette’s jaw. She moaned and collapsed unconscious to the ground.

Batgirl’s thoughts immediately turned to Diana. She slit the side of the bondage bag open with a knife. “Diana, this is Batgirl! I’ll have you out of there in a second!”

Behind Batgirl, Eenie moaned, signalling she was returning to consciousness. Batgirl turned around and slapped a pair of Bat-cuffs on her. As the heroine did so, Catwoman emerged from the bondage bag and crept up behind the crimefighter!

“I told you that you wouldn’t be having any fun today, Eenie,” Batgirl gloated, unaware she was in danger. Suddenly, the Dominoed Daredoll felt a clawed hand seize her throat from behind!

“It looks like you let the cat out of the bag,” teased the arch-villainess, “not a wise thing to do, my pretty little flying mouse.” Realising Catwoman could easily slit her throat, Batgirl remained perfectly motionless.

“What have you done with Lieutenant Mooney, Catwoman?” Batgirl asked, with as much bravado as she could muster with razor-sharp claws at her neck. “If any harm comes to her, I’ll make sure you pay!”

“If I were you, I’d be more worried about my own skin.”

“Ventilate her, boss!” yelled Eenie.

“Patience, my leopard-skinned lawbreaker. I have a much more delicious demise planned for our ravishing rodent. Until then, the Catatonic on my claws will keep Batgirl quiet.”

Catwoman scratched a single claw across the crimefighter’s cheek. Instantly Batgirl began to feel very drowsy as a familiar blackness enveloped her.

When Batgirl regained consciousness, she felt weird. She was neither wide awake nor sound asleep, but somewhere in between. After several minutes, she noticed she was completely enclosed in a blue-black membrane. A minute later, she realised what had been done to her.

‘Catwoman has made good on one of her earlier threats! She’s put me inside one of her notorious bondage bags!!!’

She recalled Catwoman’s explanation of how the bondage bag worked from when Batgirl had been coerced into judging La Esclavage Reine’s bondage competition. The bondage bag was designed to let in just enough oxygen to keep the occupant on the verge of losing consciousness.

‘That must be why I feel so sluggish.’

From inside the bondage bag, it was hard to make out her surroundings. Suddenly, Batgirl realized she was inside the Kitty Car, right next to Catwoman! She jerked more out of shock than fear.

“Awake at last, my pretty little mouse? I advise you to keep still. It will help make breathing much easier.”

‘Well, it could be worse,’ Batgirl thought wryly. 'At least Catwoman is not in Tara’s body.’

“Cheer up, Batgirl. At least I’m not in Tara’s body,” the villainess stated, mirroring Batgirl’s thoughts.

A couple of minutes later, the Kitty Car came to a halt. Catwoman’s loyal henchkitten was waiting for them. Eenie carried Batgirl inside a large industrial building. She placed the Svelte Sentinel on a door-shaped plank. A cold metallic panel, the size of a dinner plate, was under the crimefighter’s shoulder blades.

“Remove the bondage bag and prepare the prisoner,” Catwoman ordered. Using her own claws, Eenie slit the bondage bag and peeled every last scrap of it off their purple prisoner. Made weak from the lack of oxygen, Batgirl could only watch helplessly as Catwoman’s grinning henchkitten carried out her mistress’s orders.

First, Eenie tied Batgirl’s legs to the door at the ankles and knees. Then she bound the heroine’s waist. Once that was finished, she knelt down and secured Batgirl’s shoulders.

Next the brunette pulled Batgirl’s arms down onto the wooden surface, parallel to her body. A rope was passed underneath her torso several times, pinning her arms at her sides before it was expertly tied off.

As the henchkitten left the room, Batgirl could feel her strength returning. Across the room she spied Lieutenant Mooney. The policewoman’s arms and feet were bound to a chair. A black gag prevented her friend from talking.

Eenie re-appeared from behind the struggling Batgirl. “Struggle all you like, it won’t do you any good. I learnt quite a bit about ropes from Vixen.”

Catwoman entered the room, grinning like a Cheshire cat. She posed, hands on hips, in front of Batgirl. “My plan to stop you worked purr-fectly.”

“This isn’t over yet,” proclaimed Batgirl calmly. “In the end, I will prevail.”

“This time will be different, for I have devised a devilishly delicious device that will take you out of the picture purr-manently. A bat is nothing more than a flying mouse, and if you want to kill a mouse, you need the right equipment. Eenie, complete the trap.”

The henchkitten pressed a button. Batgirl watched as a large metallic structure descended from above her. The object consisted of a rectangular metal bar which ran through a metal spring.

Eenie guided it into eight-inch high mounts. A two-inch metal bar ran through the coiled spring, resting in line with Batgirl’s thighs. The metal bar formed a rectangle with the opposite end, which rested over Batgirl’s boots. As Eenie clipped the bar into place, Batgirl suddenly realised what the device was and gasped in horror. “You’re trying to finish me off in . . .

". . . a giant mouse trap!” she exclaimed.

“Purr-fectly correct.” Catwoman meowed before she burst into laughter.

“Of course, I’ve made some modifications. The metallic panel underneath your shoulder blades is actually a pressure sensor. If it detects a pressure decrease of one pound or more, it will spring the trap.”

“Isn’t one pound a bit much?” Eenie inquired.

“One pound might sound like a lot, but trust me, it isn’t. I estimate Batgirl weighs about 110 pounds. She only has to shift less than one-hundredth of her body weight and she will meet the same fate as countless mice before her. So you see, the slightest movement could prove to be Batgirl’s last.”

Returning to her prisoner, she continued her explanation. “If you touch the metallic spring, the trap will be triggered.”

“Alright,” Batgirl said defiantly. “What if I just lie here?”

Catwoman smiled. “If the trap has not already been sprung, a timer mechanism will trigger it exactly one hour after activation, leaving you beside yourself . . . literally. Your death will be recorded, so others can appreciate my criminal genius.”

“Aren’t you going to remove her utility belt?” asked Eenie.

“Not this time,” Catwoman replied. “If she struggles to reach a gadget from her belt, she risks setting off the trap. Trust me, this will make for better viewing later.”

Catwoman placed a small monitor at the base of the mousetrap, facing her prey. “This,” she continued, “will display any change in pressure. It also will count down the final hour of your crimefighting career.”

“Now that you have me, you don’t need Lieutenant Mooney anymore, so why don’t you release her?” Batgirl asked, attempting to save her friend.

“It’s true she has served her main purr-pose . . .” Catwoman mused as she appeared to consider her adversary’s appeal.
“. . . but Catarina has her own debt to work off before the two of us are even.”

“What do you mean, ‘work off?’” the Delectable Detective inquired.

“I’ve come to realise that Catarina is a very resourceful woman. I want her back on my team … after a little attitude adjustment.”

Muffled protests from the chair-bound Lieutenant Mooney indicated her opposition to Catwoman’s plans. “Eenie, fetch my special gloves,” Catwoman ordered.

Shortly thereafter, a pair of clawed gloves enclosed in a sealed plastic bag was placed before the Princess of Plunder. Catwoman carefully removed the gloves she was wearing and replaced them with the two from the plastic bag.

Several years ago, Batgirl herself had been scratched with one of those very same gloves, which she knew was coated with Cat-a-phrenic. Catwoman had also switched bodies with Batgirl, using Egghead’s psyche eggs-change machine, and had hypnotized her with the powerful Cat’s-eye Jade. For a short time, Batgirl believed she was Catwoman and had even begun her own crime spree. She was still very angry with Catwoman for doing that to her.

Batgirl watched helplessly as her friend, Diana Mooney, was scratched with the sinister substance. Within minutes, she was snarling viciously. Catwoman then retrieved the Cat’s-eye Jade and held it in front of Lieutenant Mooney’s face.

“Pretty, isn’t it? See how the light makes it sparkle. You can’t take your eyes off of it, can you?”

“Fight it Diana!” Batgirl shouted. “Fight it with every fibre of your being!”

Diana momentarily managed to avert her gaze.

“Eenie, Crimefighters are to be seen, not heard,” Catwoman said.

The henchkitten produced a purple scarf and gagged Batgirl. “There. That’s much better,” Eenie said, admiring her handiwork.

Batgirl tried to reply, but found all she could manage were muffled protestations.

Catwoman returned her attention to Lieutenant Mooney. “That’s right,” she said. “Don’t resist. Let the Jade into your mind. Your will is gone now, isn’t it? Lieutenant Diana Mooney no longer exists. Your name is Catarina, my loyal henchkitten. You follow my orders without question. You fondest desire is to please me. Like me, all you want to do is to enjoy the finer things in life, things that women of our calibre deserve.”

Catwoman looked back over her shoulder at the supine Batgirl. “Batgirl wants to spoil out party and throw us all in jail.”

“How dare she!” Catarina raged.

With a nod of her head, Catwoman signalled for Eenie to free their new criminal colleague. “That’s right,” Catwoman agreed. “How dare she, but if Batgirl was to perish, we would be able to enjoy all the catnip we want. All you have to do is push that button and Batgirl’s fate will be sealed.”

The Cat-a-phrenic had completely removed any compassion from Lieutenant Mooney’s psyche. She smiled wickedly as she activated her new boss’s trap.

“Goodbye, Batgirl. Come kittens, we have work to do,” Catwoman said as she left. Eenie and Catarina simultaneously blew goodbye kisses towards the helpless heroine before following their leader out of the building.

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