THE FOREST If they'd called it The Bush, it'd be a porno movie
If you need to rely on two dead kids to save your sorry ass from a cannibal hillbilly, then fuck you, you deserve to die, you dumb-ass monkey-fuck. That's my opinion and I'm sticking to it.
People go into the woods, get lost in the woods, get pounced on by a weird old man who kills them and eats them - sparingly, one would assume, since how often could you do this without attracting attention?
Basically your standard "slasher in the woods" piece of shit here, very slightly redeemed by an odd element involving the ghosts of two dead kids (as opposed to two live kids) and their dead mom, who help, hinder, and generally confuse the cast.
Lots of inspiring dialogue like "There's something following us." "There's nothing out there. It's just your imagination." Note that direction too, like how shots of killing are interspersed with shots of flowers. It's like "Ooh, behold the beauty amongst which this death is strewn!"
Also known as Terror In The Forest. There's not a whole lot you can say about a movie this limp and lame. It's just bad enough to be unnoticeable, and not awful enough to really rant about.
BACK TO MAIN PAGE BACK TO THE F's |
|