There's violence on the television,
And letter bombs in the mail,
But things can't be all that bad
'Cos Derryn Hinch (2) went to jail.

Famine eats up children,
The peace talks always fail
But things can't be all that bad
'Cos Derryn Hinch went to jail.

You might have double malaria
Doctors see you and go pale
But things can't be all that bad
'Cos Derryn Hinch went to jail.

Christ Himself on the cross
Told the guy who banged in the nail,
"Mate, things can't be all that bad
'Cos Derryn Hinch went to jail."

I can take Ronald Reagan (3)
I can take Menachem Begin (4)
I can take tetraplegia (5)
I can take total amnesia

I can take black spiky hair
I can take germ warfare
I can take Chasers and Inflation (6)

I can take hyperventilation
I can take total bowel disfunction
I can take nuclear destruction
I can take Mike Willesee (7) - well, at a pinch;

But one thing I cannot take is Derryn fucking Hinch.

1. This is a play on the proverb "the pen is mightier than the sword".
2. Current affairs show host Derryn Hinch spent 12 days in jail in 1986 on a contempt of court charge. Hinch revealed the name of a former priest and youth worker who had been charged with a number of sexual assaults against children. At the time of Hinch's arrest Father Michael Glennon was awaiting trial on five counts of sexual assault on children under 14. As a result of Hinch's actions, the priest was freed on the grounds he had been denied a fair trial because of Hinch's broadcasts.
Derryn Hinch is a favourite target of TISM, also being mentioned in The Mystery Of The Artist Explained, Lose Your Delusion I and Lose Your Delusion II.
3. Ronald Reagan (1911 - ) was President of the US from 1981 - 1989. His presidency was characterised by military spending and a reduction in social services.
4. Menachem Begin (1913 - 1992) was the leader of Irgun, the Zionist terrorist group instrumental in the founding of Israel. He was later Prime Minister of Israel from 1977 - 1983.
5. Also known as quadraplegia.
6. From TISM's Guide to Little Aesthetics: "Chasers [is] a large, occassionally trendy, but mostly middle of the road, night club in Melbourne. Inflation is another large Melbourne nightclub, altogether not dissimilar to Chasers. Both are immortalised in the diatribe "When I go to Chasers I pay at the door".
7. Mike Willesee is another current affairs show host whose credibility was shattered after appearing on TV, apparently drunk. Willesee later claimed to be "on medication".