justme

Vital Statistics
My screen name on AOL is WarsToy... my nickname is Toy. I'm 34 years
old, and a second generation Italian-American (Sicilian to be exact). I
was born and raised in New York City ~ the Bronx, and I now live very
happily in Southern California with my wonderful husband, Warlock388
(his AOL screen name).

Being Submissive
Before I go into my own submissiveness, I would like to explain what a Submissive
Woman is... or rather, is not. I know that most people understand this, however, there
are those who do not understand and do not take this lifestyle seriously. For those
people, I'd like to explain that "Submissive Woman" does NOT mean: easy,
up-for-grabs, slut, gay, bi, straight, free sex, cyber sex, phone sex, sex object, fool,
pushover, doormat, or weakling. A Submissive Woman is a woman who freely submits
to a Master or Mistress of her choice out of mutual love and respect. Dominance/
submission, or D/s, is an exchange of power and respect and trust between two
consenting adults, and is practiced in a "safe, sane, and consensual" manner. It is not
something that happens overnight or through a brief encounter; it takes time to
develop, like any relationship, with mutual trust and respect being paramount.

I am very proud to say that I am a submissive woman. I'm often asked why I'm
submissive, or when I became submissive... I don't know why I'm submissive, I just am.
I don't think I "became" submissive, I believe I was born this way. When I was young, I
knew I was different... I just couldn't describe it. In my early twenties, I finally discovered
what made me different. I learned about a world I didn't know existed: the world of D/s. I
came to realize that, looking back on my life, I had always been submissive. Since
then, I have learned more, not just about this lifestyle, but about myself. I've learned that
being submissive does not mean being weak, or any less of a person. I am a strong
woman... I know what I want out of life and I'm striving to obtain my goals.

Life with Warlock
I met Warlock on AOL in the fall of 1996; we became friends very quickly. Even though
we were 3,000 miles apart, we seemed to be so very close... always knowing what the
other was thinking, completing each other's sentences... it's eerie, but true. We were
connected... by our souls. Eventually, we both fell for each other and met in real life in
February of 1997. Sparks? Definitely! Warlock became my Master and I his
submissive. I moved to California the following June and have been so very happy. On
Sunday, February 14, 1999, Warlock and I made it legal... we got married! It was a
unique affair. Warlock is a veterinarian in an emergency clinic and I work there as well.
Since he was working on this day, he was dressed in his scrubs and I wore my scrub
top. The ceremony was officiated by a close friend of ours who is a minister of
metaphysics.

Master Warlock is such a bright light in my life... he has healed my broken heart... he
has made me whole again. Since 1990, I have been alone (by choice). In the summer
of that year, my mother became ill with cancer and I put my personal life on hold to care
for her. On November 2, 1991, she passed away. Not wanting to give my heart to
another and risk losing it, I lived the following years in solitude. When I met Warlock, I
was lonely, I lacked self-esteem... I was lost. He helped me change that. He helped me
regain my self-esteem. He continues to help me realize that I am a person who is
worthy of love... that I am a good person. For that, I thank him. He has made me the
person I am. I love him, trust him, respect him ~ implicitly. I have given him my gift ~~
my submission ~~ my loyalty ~~ my love. He possesses my heart, mind, body and soul.
I am honored to be his submissive and I proudly wear the collar which he has bestowed
upon me.

My Personality
I like to have fun. I am somewhat of a devil (I once had a screen name, "LilDevilGr," that
I used only for Warlock) and a bit sassy. I have been called a SAM (Smart Assed
Masochist). And let me tell you, this gets me into plenty of trouble. ::wink::

I can also be stubborn and strong willed. I have strong opinions on certain issues but I
do respect the opinions and beliefs of others. I do not impose my beliefs on other
people and I do not like that done to me. After all, we are all entitled to our own beliefs.

I'm a good person. Friendly. Always willing to help those in need. I can be a shoulder to
cry on, an ear to listen, a voice to give advice. I do my best to be a good friend. I am
honest, sincere and loyal. I stick by my friends when they are in trouble and offer help
when needed. I treat all people with respect (regardless of race, religion, sexual
orientation), at least until they prove they don't deserve it... I will not put up with
disrespectful people. I detest racism, rudeness, dishonesty, deceitfulness and
backstabbing.

I believe firmly in honesty. I am honest with everyone and I expect others to be honest
as well. Unfortunately, when I find out that someone has been dishonest, I have a hard
time ever trusting that person again.

"The truth may hurt but it will only hurt once. A lie can hurt forever."
me*

Happiness is...
Serving, pleasing, and loving my Master. He is the best; therefore, he deserves the
best... so I give him the best that I've got. The following is an exerpt from the song, "I
Get Weak" by Belinda Carlisle; it expresses how I feel towards my love, my husband,
my Master:

"Oh I'm in love... Oh I'm in deep... cuz baby...
with a kiss you can strip me defenseless...
with a touch I completely lose control...
all that's left of my strength is a memory...
I get weak..."

Happiness also is...
Enjoying life and living it to it's fullest. Taking advantage of what life has to offer me.
Taking chances and doing different things. Twenty years from now, I don't want to look
back and say "Gee, I should have done that." Twenty years from now, I want to say, "I'm
so happy I took a chance and did that." No regrets. I believe that everything you do in
your life is a learning experience. Whether or not it is successful, you should be glad
you took the chance and did it. If you don't, you'll never know what could have been.

My Favorite Things
I love roses, the color pink (all shades), reading, writing, Star Trek, Babylon5, ER, most
types of music, movies, Victorian art, wicker baskets, potpourri, ribbons, satin, lace,
hearts, angels, stuffed animals as well as real live animals, scented candles,
antiques... just to name a few.

My Favorite Animals
I love all animals, especially cats. We have ten ~ yes ten ~ cats. They are: Max the
Domme Cat, Pebbles and BamBam the Twins (Bammy is my baby), Picard the Picky
Guy, Xena the warrior princess, Katya the little imp, Fozzie the fuzzy guy, Lestat the
vampire kitty (he likes to give love bites), Bob E., the tailless wonder (he's a Manx) and
the newest addition to our home, Newt, a 12 week old baby named for the little girl
"Newt" from the movie Aliens because she looks like an alien kitten.. We have a dog,
Tucker, a six year old MinPin (miniature Pinscher) who happens to be a sweetheart.
We also have a couple of aquariums with a large variety of fish including a gourami
named Psycho, two strawberry tetras (or little pink fish) known as Toy1 and Toy2,
neons, platys, crabs, etc in the large tank and, in the smaller tank we have a beautiful
beta named Will Scarlet because he is bright red in color with some blue and green
coloring in his tail.

Gone but always in our hearts...
In October of 1997, we adopted two kittens, Picard and Worf. On December 15, 1997,
Worf died due to complications after surgery. He was about 11 weeks old. I am
mentioning this because I need to somehow immortalize him. He was one of the cutest
kittens I had ever seen. Soft black fur (he was long haired)... soulful pale yellow eyes ~
he often had a faraway look in his eyes as though he was contemplating the meaning of
life or such... he was very mellow, lazy to a point, but he was a feisty little fellow too. He
and his brother, Picard, would chase each other around for hours, tumble and rumble
and then curl up together and sleep and dream their little kitty dreams ~ dreams of
chasing mice or each other, playing with their catnip toys, etc. Picard is now well over a
year old (we estimated he was born around September 25, 1997) and is doing fine.
He still runs around creating havok wherever he goes and terrorizes everyone in the
house... even the bigger cats! And he just loves to play with "the babies" (Xena, Katya,
Fozzie and Lestat).

Just before we adopted Picard and Worf, we lost another kitten. His name was
Midnight, he was about 8 weeks old, black with faint brown stripes, big golden eyes
and a cute and curious face. He was a feisty cat too... he loved to run and jump and
scamper... and then nuzzle your neck and quietly fall asleep.

Troi, our first Beta fish, and Orion, our second beta fish, unfortunately passed away.
They were both such beautiful fish... they are also missed.

Needless to say we are heartbroken after losing Worf, Midnight, Troi and Orion. We
loved them so very much... we will always love them... and we miss them terribly... but
we will never forget them.

My Favorite People
My husband and Master, Warlock, my friends in New York, New Jersey and Texas,
and all of my friends on AOL... you know who you are and you know I love you (I'd
list their names, but then I'd have to start a new page!!!).

My family back in New York: my sister and her husband, their kids ~ my beautiful 18
year old niece, my handsome 13 year old nephew, and various aunts, uncles and
cousins.

And last, but definitely not least... My Mom, whom I love and dearly miss. ::looking up...
Love ya Mom!:: She was a warm hearted woman who meant a lot to me. She was
more than just a mother, she was my very best friend. She taught me a lot about life,
especially how to be a good person and treat others with respect. I would not be the
person I am today if it weren't for her guidance and love. I treasure all my memories of
her. I will never forget the love she gave me. She will always be a part of me. I have
written a poem about her, click here Mom if you'd like to read it.

Epilogue
Well, there you are... my abbreviated life story. If there is anything more you would like
to know about me (within reason), please send me an email and I will tell you more.
Send email to WarsToy@aol.com and please put this comment in the subject area:
Regarding Toy's Place.