I really value myself. I feel I am a worthwhile person. Nothing has to happen for me to feel good. I feel good simply because I'm alive; life is a gift and I revel in it. This is the perfect example of positive thinking. But positive thinking is a complex thing, and can be used in a wide variety of situations.
There is another term that is particularly useful: constructive thinking. Say you are in a parking place and a car parks on your foot. Positive thinking suggests you make the best of a bad situation; admire the architecture, watch the people. Constructive thinking suggests you find a way to get the car shifted. Positive thinking asks: what is good about this? Constructive thinking asks: what might be better / different? You should always look for ways to improve things.
Our success is determined by the way we think, which is determined by the questions we ask ourselves.
Choose to focus on the positive interpretation of things (for example, when your spouse is late). Focus on solutions rather than on problems. Focus on what you want rather than on what you don’t want; although negative motivation (moving away from A rather than towards B) can be powerfully motivating, it can have a negative impact as well, causing stress and fear – which will certainly not help you achieve your objective. Always ask “how can I benefit from this”? Focus on empowering words and feelings.
Make sure you don’t set yourself any barrier. Athletes used to think it’s humanly impossible to run a mile in less than four minutes. Once somebody proved this wrong, in less than a year, four others also ran a mile in less than four minutes. When faced with a problem, try to avoid thinking or talking about it in a way that suggests it’s pervasive (affecting many areas), personal (something’s wrong with you personally) or permanent (it’s here to stay for a long time).
High achievers tend to see problems as transitory, affecting a specific area and not as caused by something deeper, like a character flaw.
Don’t let a past circumstance limit today’s happiness. Use your standards for what's realistic, not other’s. If you think it’s possible, it might well be.
