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Despite recent positive job numbers, citing outsourcing of jobs to other countries, a continued trade imbalance, and non-existent benefits from free trade, Republican members of the US Congress will ask President George Bush to repeal the long adhered to economic law of diminishing returns. "It no longer makes sense to abide by laws that do not support the American way of life or any capitalist-based way of life for that matter," commented Allan Rhodes (R-Rhode Island), Committee Chair of the Committee for Repealing Stupid Economic Laws. "Sure, this law has been in vogue since the 1700's, but where has it gotten us, really?"
 A graphic depiction of the law that is ruining America. Can anything be done? Can GATT or the World Court step in to protect US producers? Will Smith? Betty Won't? According to noted scholar Ralphaeus Wiggamington, PhD., at the School of Advanced Thought (SAT) in Stuttgart, Germany, the law of diminishing returns is immutable. "That's right," explained his eminence, Wiggamington, "You cannot mute the law. I've tried, and it is, in fact, immutable. I even hit it repeatedly with a ball peen hammer - nothing. It has a high immutability factor. Stronger even than, say, price gouging or gas prices or Taffy." What is mutable then? Nothing when it comes to economics, says Wiggamington. And therein lies the rub. The Chinese and other Asian countries, who produce every known electronic gadget, have figured out a way to suspend some of the laws using advanced theoretical particle physics and chaos theory. This has put the Western World at a supreme disadvantage vis a vie others who are in this field of producing things like Cracker Jacks(tm) for consumption. North America could file an unfair trade practises complaint under GATT (General Agreement on Trade Thingys), but, according to experts, that would take years to resolve. What is needed is action now and that is why repealing the law is so attractive to at least the Republican side of the US Congress. "We aren't doing this because it's fashionable," said representative Duff Wallgum, R-Northern Kentucky. "We know the law doesn't apply to the drug trade and, now that the Chinese have managed to apply the same logic to other goods using advanced science, we feel it's time for America and other willing countries, to form a coalition of willing nation-states to willingly will the law out of existence." "It will bring all costs down and that's good," commented Frederika Commentarington, IMF spokesperson. "Especially for those who supply products to companies like Wal-Mart, which is driving costs down anyway. This just validates the approach. The IMF has many loan options to support this at very high interest rates. Give us a call." It's a huge gambit to repeal a law so entrenched as the law of diminishing returns. But these Republican mavericks are serious about convincing President Bush to repeal a law that no one believes in any more and even fewer understand, especially those in the Bush White House. These ground breaking neo-capitalists believe that no matter how much you invest you should get the same return or at least huge tax breaks at consumer and taxpayer expense to offset the difference. It's the way things are done. And, according to Republican Allan Rhodes, the only way to save the American way of life.
 An average Republican damns stupid law. © Copyright(c) Paul C. Vincent™, all rights reserved 1998-2004 (does not apply to original material by others published here).
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