Seify's Incomplete "You Know You're a Narutard If..." List
Written by Seify, a.k.a. momo
||©2006 by Seify (momo), initially as a response to me worrying that I classified as a Narutard. (I don't.) I have her permission to archive this list here; to contact Seify, visit her Livejournal userinfo page, but please beware: she isn't interested in your flames, or very much in your opinions, for that matter. I apologize - you can flame me and tell me your opinions!||


You Know You're a Narutard If...

1. You worship Hot Topic. And you have every piece of Naruto merchandise except for anything that has Sakura's hideous face on it.

2. You're unavaliable every Saturday night. You tell your friends you've got a hot date with Toonami later and you can't afford to miss it. You want to be there for when Sakura finally dies. Because, you know, she totally will.

3. You have a ninja band from a village that you've never even heard of. Hell, it might not even exist! You're a ninja from moon village? Awesome! Wear that head band with pride, fellow ninja.

4. You wear that ninja band. EVERYWHERE.

5. You can't even pronounce "Naruto." The guy on Toonami says "Narudo" and he's always right.

6. You've participated in a Naruto roleplay and was booted out because you didn't even know what the hell was going on and they wouldn't let you kill Sakura.

7. You roleplayed a character you created who's directly related to one of the main characters. Naruto's long lost twin sister who also has a nine-tailed demon inside her? The only other surviving Uchiha other than Sasuke and Itachi? It's possible!

8. You went to your first anime convention and called every Naruto cosplayer by the wrong name. "Hey Sakura! Can I take your picture?" "Uh, I'm not Sakura - I'm Tayuya."

9. You've written your very own Naruto fanfic. The main character is just like you but prettier, sexier, smarter and ten million times cooler than you are. She falls in love with Sasuke who is secretly madly in love with her and they fuck when he confesses his undying love for her. They don't even have to know anything about each other. "You're hot, I'm hot, we love each other, let's fuck." And they live happily ever after.

10. The sex scene in your fanfiction is longer than all the other scenes put together.

11. Sasuke is yours and only yours. Any other girl who claims to be his wife will be flamed with horrible grammar followed with every angry/evil emoticon times ten.

12. You actually believe that Sasuke is your little honey biscuit. You refuse to date real guys because then you would be cheating on Sasuke. And you wouldn't want to do that.

13. You purchased the first DVD. So what if it only has four episodes on it? As long as Sasuke is in one of those episodes, you could watch it over and over and over again.

14. You've drawn yourself and Sasuke wearing matching outfits. It doesn't bother him that you totally copied his style, he's flattered. If only everyone else in the series would realize that white shorts and a blue shirt with that silly fan on the back is the way to go...

15. The attractive characters are the only ones you really care about. Shino? Kabuto? ZAKU? Who the hell are these people? They must be minor characters- like the ones you see walking around in the background.

Yeah. It's nowhere near completion.