MISSING APPEAL AD
Counselling service for c-listers who refuse to stay out of the public eye.
VIZ ISSUE 187, AUG 2009

NOW GOOGLE PHOTOS ALL OUR BOTTOMS AND PUTS THEM ONLINE
Outrage as new Google 'Arse-View' could enable terrorists to plant bombs up the PM's rectum.
VIZ ISSUE 185, MAY 2009

BE A PLUMBER AD
And meet up to 40,000 women p.a.
VIZ ISSUE 18-phwooaar, APRIL 2009

GRAVY FOUNTAINS
The latest fad for sophisticated weddings, and for Wayne & Coleen.
VIZ ISSUE 182, FEB 2009

BEST OF BRITISH SHITE TOUR
Another paint-by-numbers ad begging to be done. So I knocked it out in a jiffy and posted it up to The Viz.
VIZ ISSUE 178, SEP 2008

PAUL BURRELL'S PUBIC DIANA COLLECTION. An old idea made better by the Viz team who took pity on me and my 'elements used thereof' explanation & rather decently paid me for it.
VIZ ISSUE 177, AUG 2008

SMACKMART
All your drug peripherals under one roof! Includes the BIG 50 metre foil roll. Just off the M89 near Cruxflap.
VIZ ISSUE 174, APRIL 2008

GOOSESTEP MASTER
The one and only Nazi perambulation device. Get it before its banned.
VIZ ISSUE 174, APRIL 2008

TERROR PHONE CHAT
Well dodgy original 'hardcore' fatwat inducing version inspired by Al Qaeda's 'media wing'
VIZ ISSUE 174, APRIL 2008

BEAR GRYLLS SURVIVAL DREAMS
The survivalist's survival expert tells you how to survive real life tragedy.
VIZ ISSUE 169, OCT 2007

FLU CRUISE
Ahoy there! Virus aboard!
Plus, Ahar there! Scurvy tours!
VIZ ISSUE 168, SEP 2007

BUSMAN'S HOLIDAY
Learn how to drive across Europe one-handed for 17 hours non-stop whilst rolling a joint & balancing a full can of lager in your lap.
VIZ ISSUE 166, JUNE/JULY 2007

IF DIANA HAD LIVED... My original (& more succint version) of how the world would have been a much better place once the Princess of Peace had charmed Bin Laden, fixed Palestine, Tsunamis, and stopped Noel Edmonds return to our TV screens. VIZ ISSUE 166, JUNE/JULY 2007

NO SEXISM PLEASE, WHERE EUROPEAN
Bonkers EU bureaucrats attempt to curtail British traditions of sexism in the workplace.
VIZ ISSUE 165, MAY 2007

BIN LADEN'S ECO-FRIENDLY VOW
Original version of Osama's re-packaging as the world's first enviromentally-conscious terrorist.
VIZ ISSUE 165, MAY 2007

PREMIUM RATE PHONESEX DEBT LINES
Loan fantasies, group loans, spunk it all away... (original full sex version)
VIZ ISSUE 164, APRIL 2007

PILOT SHIRTS
Shirts for drunken pilots.
VIZ ISSUE 158, SEP 2006

PAST LIFE CREDIT? CLAIM NOW!
Fairly obvious variation on a theme paint-by-numbers spoof ad.
VIZ ISSUE 156, JUNE/JULY 2006

NEW PETER KAY VIDEO!
Woeful Cash-in Entertainment presents Britain's top comic at someone else's wedding in 1985.
VIZ ISSUE 152, FEBRUARY 2006

DEATH OF A MILKMAN.
Britain's traditional randy pinta-man is set to become a thing of the past - as doorstep requests from scantily clad housewives for slap 'n' tickle slump to an all-time low.
VIZ ISSUE 150, NOVEMBER 2005

PARAPET MADNESS.
A rather obvious spoof of the manic carpet ads.
VIZ ISSUE 150, NOVEMBER 2005

SOAP STARS TERROR THREAT.
Is Osama bin Laden's sinister hand behind the tragic soap deaths?
VIZ ISSUE 150, NOVEMBER 2005

STAIRBATHAMATIC.
Is this the UK's premier walk-in bath stairlift?
VIZ ISSUE 149, OCTOBER 2005

A CENTURY OF DISASTER THROWS. More from the Dianabury Mint.
VIZ ISSUE 146, JUNE/JULY 2005

Start an exciting new hobby - GAMBLING !

VIZ ISSUE 143, MARCH 2005

DIANA'S TEARS. The Dianabury Mint are proud to present a timeless amulet containing tears so pure they could only have come from The Queen of Hearts herself. VIZ ISSUE 138, SEP 2004

SOAP DISH special - comedy legend to make a hilarious cameo in Coronation St.
VIZ ISSUE 136, JUNE/JULY 2004

Male drivers - don't have a ladies' accidents!
Have a REAL MEN'S one
VIZ ISSUE 135, APRIL 2004

LES DENNIS rocks his fans with this latest heartfelt admission...
VIZ ISSUE 134, MARCH 2004

Advert: Die Mensch... die frauen... die maschine... DAS HARVEST, 1939 Kollectenplatten
VIZ ISSUE 133, FEB 2004

Advert: "Keeping prices low by stacking 'em high. Get down to PALLET LAND this winter.
VIZ ISSUE 131, DEC 2003 / JAN 2004

Top stars in terror alert: Celebs as wide-ranging as Les Dennis & Bobby Davro voice their fears.
VIZ ISSUE 130, NOV 2003

Two years on & six years on: Hands across the ocean - in tragedy. Bandwagon Mint invites you to buy this beautifully packaged Princess Di-9/11 coffee coaster set.
VIZ ISSUE 129, OCT 2003

Fancy holding an impromptu meat bingo night, but you're fridge is low on meat? Then simply ring All Night Meat Bingo thru this advert.
VIZ ISSUE 128, SEP 2003

An exclusive offer from the makers of Man Creche. Get your man out of his office and into the shops - with the Man Pram!
VIZ ISSUE 127, AUG 2003

Special travel news for priests caught with their hands in the choir. Get out of the parish fast with the Pederast Shipping Co.
VIZ ISSUE 122, FEB 2003

*This well dodgy advert also appears in Viz's new Roger Mellie Ad Break Book - OUT ages ago.