Thyself
Known
Ch.3- The Beast Within
By Zorknot
DISCLAIMER: I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean
to steal Rumiko Takahashi’s characters! Honest! It just sorta…happened.
I suspect demonic forces are at work...
Note: This is a rewrite. Changes were mostly
in the first two sections and in the last section, for those who’ve read the
first version. Really you might as well read the whole thing over.
What Has Come Before- Ranma had a dream. Ranma’s curse
changed. Now he’s female whenever he feels female. Happosai can control
minds and make ki apples. Oh and Ranma seems to have gone a tiny bit
insane. It’s okay…no biggie.
~~~~~*~~~~~
"You can have my
isolation,
You can have the hate that it brings
You can have my absence of faith,
You can have my everything
Help me!
Tear down my reason.
Help me!
It’s your sex I can smell
Help me!
You make me perfect.
Help me become somebody else..."
-Closer- Nine Inch Nails
~~~~~[START]~~~~~
Early
morning found Shampoo furry, exhausted, and miserable. She had gotten wet the
night before while delivering ramen, and as it turns out, cats can’t ride
bicycles. A five-minute trip on a bike instantly turned into a twelve or
thirteen hour trek through darkened streets and strange neighborhoods. That
wasn’t what made Shampoo miserable though.
Shampoo
hated her curse. She hated it because it was a reminder of how stupid she had
been, of her failure to secure Ranma to herself, and of her sheer ineptness,
but this was secondary, merely the insult added to a much more massive injury.
The real reason she hated her curse, the one she would only reveal to someone
if she were extremely drunk and held at gunpoint…was what it did to her once a
month.
Cats
approach relationships a little differently from most humans. A cat does not,
for instance, get to know another cat over a can of fish, then escort the other
cat back to its home whereupon the decision to make love is made based on
mutual agreement and after consideration is made of all the consequences. No,
the feline concept of foreplay runs something like this: a female cat begins to
menstruate. She unconsciously gives off a pungent odor that makes all male cats
into sex craved lunatics. She also is driven to become a sex craved lunatic
herself by the hormones raging through her bloodstream. A male cat approaches
from behind whereupon the female can either act on what little self control
they have and attack, or can adopt "The Position". Adopting "The
Position" consists of lying on the stomach and raising the hindquarters
with the back legs. This facilitates mating.
Shampoo
REALLY hated her curse.
It
was that time of the month for Shampoo, and though she pleaded with the old
ghoul to let her stay at the café…it was to no avail. She had to deliver a
large order of ramen to some well-to-do regular who lived almost on the other
side of
And
then it rained.
Almost
immediately after she changed form, they started to come. The first one was the
worst…It was a striped gray tabby with a chunk taken out of his left ear. Very
handsome by cat standards. It slunk predatorily toward Shampoo. Instantly, she
felt almost uncontrollable animal urges. But they weren’t urges to run, or even
to approach the other cat. They were telling her to adopt the position...to sit
still and take it. It’ll feel goooood! her
hormones promised... even as an equally instinctual part of her told her that
it, in fact, would not. That first one had gotten so close... and then finally
Shampoo managed to break the hold her hormones had on her and attack, And then
it took a good five minutes to wound the persistent and battle-worn creature
enough to make him relent. Amazon techniques didn’t translate well to her cat
form, but they kept her from a fate worse than death.
There
were more though. Non-stop cats...one after another after another. Sometimes
there were two at a time. Sometimes more. Always she would somehow manage to
fend them off, pick up her money pouch with her mouth and plod onwards. The
wounds she received healed fairly quickly but often there were so many of
them...on nights like this last one Shampoo felt she was in a mindless world of
sexual cravings, fear, anger, and pain. There was barely enough time to think,
and sometimes...sometimes she wouldn’t.
Shampoo
shuddered as she ambled to the back door of the Nekohanten. She tried to put
her mind on other things, tried to focus on the sights the…smells. The stench
of the dumpster beside the door almost completely covered the sweet fragrance
of cooked Ramen. This disgusted Shampoo. It disgusted her because as a cat she
actually found the odor of refuse enticing. And this reminded her that she was
a cat. And that she was in heat…
Yes,
even now she felt her body calling out to be taken…
Shampoo
stopped, closed her eyes, shuddered, opened them again and plodded on with
determination. She would NOT let this defeat her. She was Amazon. She was
human.
The
pet door in front of Shampoo seemed to laugh at her.
She
pushed through it angrily and went to the small furo in the back room. She
jumped on a nearby stool, dropped the money pouch from her mouth, and after
battling against the instinctual revulsion she felt about water in general,
jumped in the steaming water, becoming human once again. She felt the insane,
sexual hunger slip away in the heat. She released the tension she had felt all
night and relaxed. Her thoughts drifted.
How
had she gotten here? How had she gone from being a respected Amazon fresh into
womanhood with her future ensured, to being a beast enslaved by carnal desires?
Ranma.
Yes,
that was of course the answer. If it weren’t for Ranma and his father she would
be in
This
was the real reason why Shampoo wanted Ranma dead badly enough to chase the
redhead almost all the way across
She
was attracted to cats.
Male
ones.
Preferably
all black with ears slightly damaged but not to the point of being grotesque
and eyes that flash blue in the night… Shampoo shook her head free of the
image. At first it was just a dream that she had when she slept as a cat, but
recently she’d been having it as a human too…
Shampoo
realized she was gripping the edge of the furo a little tightly. She willed
herself to relax, to let the blessed heat take her thoughts elsewhere.
Thankfully, the tile was only cracked a little.
Having
lived with the curse for a year now, Shampoo had come up with some rather
desperate solutions to her problem. One idea she had…more often than she
liked…was that maybe if she just let herself be taken, she’d get over it and
feel better. But that was WAY too dangerous. Shampoo recalled the text in
Amazon Guide to Jusenkyo … "If a Jusenkyo victim is impregnated," the
book said "then she will remain in form she was impregnated in for the
rest of her life." If she ever succumbed to her urges…her humanity could
be lost forever. If, on the other hand, she were to get pregnant in her human
form…she’d be cured.
This
was the true reason why the society that lived so close to Jusenkyo was
matriarchal. Women had a not so easy cure to the curses. Men didn’t. In a
region with no running water, this placed women somewhat ahead of men in
dominance. They didn’t even need to carry the baby to term. Many of those women
who were cursed simply got themselves pregnant and aborted right away using
homemade herbal concoctions. There were those that disapproved of these
actions, and from time to time, depending on who was on the council, they were
sufficient grounds for banishment, but far more got away with it than suffered
any consequences.
Unfortunately,
there were several reasons why this desperate ploy would not work. First of
all, if she got pregnant by anyone other than Ranma she’d never be able to
return home. Not that she particularly cared about that anymore, but with the
ghoul watching her, there was no way that she could go against this. Second, it
was one thing to think about enacting such a plan, it was another to actually
DO it. Shampoo, being only sixteen herself, was somewhat inexperienced in that
sort of thing. She couldn’t even get Ranma, someone she felt she truly loved,
to have sex with her, how was she going to get a complete stranger to?
Shampoo
was learning that Ranma was a special case, that, for instance, Mister
Well-To-Do halfway across
She
wished she could see Ranma naked more often. In either form. He made her think
such naughty thoughts...
Shampoo
smiled as she replayed a few of them.
Yes,
If it was going to be anybody it had to be Ranma. Honored Mummy on a Stick was
SUPPOSED to be helping her get him, but ever since she used the cat’s tongue on
the half-boy, Shampoo started to suspect what the old crone really wanted was
for Ranma to join the Amazons as a woman. Every time Shampoo thought of it, the
more sense it made. As a man, Ranma would be stifled. His skills, due to his
backward culture, were womanlier than most would tolerate from a man. All he
would be good for was genes, and while good genes are helpful in improving a
bloodline, they do not ensure talent. On the other hand, if Ranma willingly
joined the Amazons as a woman, then they’d have full access to his skills AND
have the loyalty of his children as well. Not to mention Akane, Ukyo, and even Kodachi would make formidable Amazons in their own right
and if Ranma joined the Joketsuzoku then they might choose to follow.
Shampoo
initially thought the idea wouldn’t work. Despite being very womanly in skill
and temperament (something Shampoo didn’t mind at all, she liked a boy with
spunk) Ranma was quite adamant about being a boy. But when Grandmother used the
Cat’s Tongue and Ranma started working at the café… There were times when
Shampoo could swear that Ranma had been born female. Suddenly Ranma joining the
Amazons as a woman was much more feasible. The problem with this was that if
Ranma became Amazon he would most likely be "cured" of his boy form.
There were two ways this could happen. There was something called the Chisuiton
that the Musk used often for their sordid practices that would lock a curse, or
Ranma could.... Shampoo didn’t want to think about that... she had had enough
nightmares about it already.
She
started glomping him even when he was a girl in the
hope that somehow she could keep him from becoming a girl mentally Perhaps the
idea was silly, but it was the only thing she could think of, and besides, she
enjoyed it too much to stop.
And...there
was a time when a little affection had saved Shampoo from permanent cat-hood.
The Bake Neko. That giant ghost cat... After that
cold, dark New Year’s Eve, he became a permanent denizen of her nightmares. He
was always there, sometimes in the background, sometimes towering above...so
close. Always he had that insane smile in his face, his feline face, and he
seemed to laugh...only it came out a meow, or a yowl, or a hiss, or a purr.
Before the Bake Neko, Shampoo had just begun to dislike her curse. She had
only changed to a cat during menstruation five times. She had only been having
the cat dreams for a month and only when she slept in her cursed form. Any
lesser woman would have broken before that point, but Shampoo grinned and bore
it all the way until after the new year...after the Bake Neko.
It wasn’t until then that she truly started to hate her curse.
Her experience with the Bake Neko marked the first time she had ever been attracted to a
cat...as a human.
When she remembered that night
she told herself that she tried to get away, that there was nothing she could
do, that she had been helpless. But she knew...she could have struggled more,
fought more, attacked more. Sure it might have all been in vain but she was
Amazon. She should at least have tried. But while she wanted to leave there was
another part of her that said stay. Let him marry you it said. Ranma
doesn’t love you. Become a cat. Leave Ranma and Mousse and
It was that time of the month
again.
So she agreed to his terms. If
Ranma kissed her before New Year’s, the Ghost Cat would leave Shampoo alone,
and move on, but if he did not, Shampoo would marry the Bake Neko, and she would be a cat forever. Ranma wouldn’t kiss
her though. As the hour of
She didn’t really think about it
until much later. Ranma had an intense fear of cats and that he would kiss
Shampoo in that state even by accident meant some strong feeling was
counteracting the fear. Shampoo wished she could believe it was love, but if
that were the case why didn’t he kiss her sooner? No it was, just a different
type of fear...of Akane perhaps.
Ranma didn’t love Shampoo. As a
friend maybe, but no more. Shampoo had to keep trying though. She had one or
two experiences... She laughed them off at the time, but at moments like now,
when she was alone she would think of them. Sometimes she’d just be
walking...in human form...by a cat or a group of cats...and she’d feel it. The
intense attraction...the need to mate so overpowering that she had to run
away... It was getting worse. It had to stop, and it had to stop soon.
Shampoo
got out of the furo, dried off, wrapped the towel around herself and walked to
her room to dress. She realized she was acting like a weak little lovesick boy,
heck, her methods weren’t all that different from Mousse’s, but she didn’t
care. She loved Ranma. He was the only thing that brought her out of her funk.
He was the only thing she had outside her work and her training. He was the
only thing that made her feel alive.
She
ran outside dodging Grandmother and Mousse. She had to see him today. She had
to.
He
was the only thing that made her feel human.
~~~~~*~~~~~
Ranma
Saotome was running on the top of the fence.
Slap
slap slap slap, went her feet, one in front of the other in front of
the other. On her left the road with Akane in her school uniform, carrying her
bookbag under her arm like an assault rifle and looking ahead with the determination
of a bulldozer. On her right, the raging currents of the drain pipe. A few
pieces of trash floated on the water, smoothly navigating the eddies and
currents until they came to rest at some unseen grate or bend in the channel.
Ranma
felt like it was herself floating on that channel, pushed by unseen currents.
How could she change course? Did she even want to? Where was she going? What
was she going to do?
Ranma
was NOT going to go to school, not to class anyway. That was certain. She had
far too many things to think about. No, she needed answers. Tofu...that would
be the best place to start. The clinic was on the way to school and if she went
there she could get a pass from him so she wouldn’t have to worry about being
absent for the day. At this point, one more absence was academic after all the
crises that had occurred in the past, but the teachers were more prone to let
her be if she gave them a slip... so why not? If Tofu didn’t have any answers,
she might visit Hinako, but getting information from her wasn’t really worth
the trouble. Besides, she probably wouldn’t know anything anyway. If that
didn’t work...
Ranma
jumped over a gap in the fence as she tried to put her mind around the problem.
If everyone just left her alone she could have maybe trained on what Happosai
showed her and figured something out, but Akane wouldn’t let up. It was
strange- she expected her to take her to school even after what happened. Then
Pops had pressed Ranma to go and Tendo-san joined in shortly after... Ranma was
out of the door before she even had a chance to think.
Her
first thought after her mind had cleared a little and she had a better idea of
what the hell she was doing, was that she should have beat Happosai up a heck
of a lot more than she did. She should have made the little runt tell her
exactly what was going on and then tied him up and dangled him from a tree, one
that was still standing, for good measure. At the time though, she was so
worried she would kill him. More than that she was worried about what killing
someone, even someone as despicable as Happosai, would do to her. And she had
to admit; the perv had his good points. Sometimes
Ranma wished her life wasn’t so violent. Then maybe she could wear something
decent instead of these icky boy’s clothes...
Ranma
felt confused for a moment. Where had that come from? Ranma was reminded of
that negligee she wore and subsequently of the strange business that occurred
while she had worn it...
Masculine
and feminine ki... If that were really the key to her curse now, how come she
couldn’t change? She had been trying to think male, to create masculine ki,
whenever she had a spare moment, but it didn’t work. Something kept distracting
her...
Ranma
looked at Akane again. She was mad about something. What did she have to be mad
about? It wasn’t like she was stuck in the wrong body or anything. And why was
she such a bitch earlier? Ranma and Akane teased each other all the time, but
there were boundaries...unwritten rules. It was like a sparring match. What
Akane had said was painful and unexpected. Ranma tapped out, but Akane kept
going... pressing harder. That was unnecessary roughness. That wasn’t
honorable. Tendo-san had that one pegged.
Ranma
wondered what it would be like to fight Akane to the death. Truth be told, the
tomboy did have some nasty tricks...that hammer of hers might be hard to get
around, but really it was simply a matter of hitting the right nerve hard
enough, and Ranma was sure she could do that... Then of course there would be
the messy business of disposing of the body...
Huh?
Why was I thinkin’ of killing Akane? What’s wrong
with me? I don’t wanna kill her! I l- lo- Ah shit, I gotta at least be able ta THINK
it. I love ‘er. There.
It
was true. She stuck up for him so many times in the past, she helped out with
Nodoka, and she saved him from that eight-headed dragon... Sure she wasn’t that
great in the Art, but she had spirit, and she always fought for the right
things. Except for now. Somethin’ must be
up, Ranma decided, She’s gotta have some
reason for actin’ like that.
Ranma
jumped down from the fence to intercept Akane.
~~~~~*~~~~~
"Oi! What’s wrong with you today Ak-umph!"
Akane
shoved past Ranma by gently slamming Ranma in the cheek with her fist and ran
onwards. Why did she bother trying to help the idiot get to school on time? He
always bothered her. It was better when she just had the hentai
horde to deal with at least then...
Ranma
caught up with her and ran along side of her. "C’mon Akane! You’re more
upset than usual and that’s sayin’ somethin’!"
"…"
Akane answered. She kept running as if Ranma wasn’t there.
So what if he saved her life a
few times. She’d saved his life too. They were even as far as she was
concerned. And there’s no reason why the marriage should continue. Akane
smiled. He was really a she after all. Yeah, a real girly girl. Akane’s
smile went sour, Even girlier than...
"Akane-chan?
You know you can talk to me about anything and I won’t think ill of you."
Akane
stopped suddenly. It seemed almost as if Ranma had read her mind and started
imitating the girliest girl Akane knew...her sister
Kasumi.
Ranma
smiled pleasantly. It was unnerving to see that smile on Ranma’s face. Ranma
could look amused, determined, interested, angry...peaceful just wasn’t in his
usual repertoire. Yet here was a Kasumi smile, fresh from the kitchen. Here was
the smile that had melted Dr. Tofu’s heart, and turned his brain to mush. Here
was the massive weapon that Kasumi always weilded
with the ease of a seasoned samurai. The true family sword...passed down from
mother to daughter...but not to Akane. No Akane was too much of a tomboy.
Kasumi was always Mommy’s favorite...
Akane
started to walk away slowly.
Ranma
spoke again. This time her voice was different. Lower...and dripping with
sarcastic tone. "You know, Akane, if you don’t tell me what’s bothering
you I’ll have to come up with my own scenarios. I’d hate to think what would
happen if I inadvertently started a rumor..." Akane looked at Ranma’s face
and saw the knowing smirk of Nabiki. It was closer to Ranma’s normal range of
expressions, but somehow this made it even more unnerving.
Akane stopped
again.
For a moment, Akane felt the
fear she felt earlier this morning. For a moment Akane wished again that she
could apologize and be nicer to Ranma, but she knew that if she said
anything...she’d have to say everything. And if she did that...she’d somehow
make the pain more real. She fought back the tears that welled in her eyes as
she remembered Ranma’s dead eyes this morning, Nabiki’s dead eyes on that
afternoon more than a year ago. She willed her eyes to dry. I will not let
that bastard see me cry. I need to get away. I should not have let him come
with me.
She thought of the comforting
walls of the school, the marvelous high school, where she had normal friends,
where people still respected her, where she once, for a brief moment, had been
the best.
"Just...leave me alone,
Ranma," Akane said softly, her voice cracking a little. She slowly started
to walk away again. Gradually she picked up speed as the avalanche of her emotions
pushed her forward.
But the avalanche didn’t keep
Ranma away. There the red-head was, matching her top speed with out even
running out of breath. "Come on Akane, just tell me what’s wrong
already!
Akane wondered... Why did
she have Ranma come with her? She could have left him at home and she wouldn’t
have had to deal with this..."Leave. Me. Alone." Akane restated and
pushed herself going even faster, trying to outrun Ranma.
But Akane could not outrun
Ranma. To make things worse Ranma increased her speed, sprinting some ten
meters ahead of Akane and stopping to intercept her again.
"I’m
not joking Akane! Honestly! The way you’re talking you’d think *I* were
the one who’s acting strange!"
And
who was this? The red head had her fists at her sides her lips in an indignant
pout. She looked at this moment like a brat who was used to getting her way all
the time and who couldn’t understand why she wasn’t getting it now. This wasn’t
Ranma. This was another Ranma game. Another persona he was putting on for a
moment and throwing away. It’s me, Akane realized, the bastard is
imitating me! The problem was he was doing such a good job of it. Akane
could see how irrational she was being. She could see it...but she couldn’t
stop it.
Akane knew then why she wanted
Ranma there. She wanted him to insult her. She wanted him to be the same jerk
he usually was so she could at least feel somewhat justified. But there was not
one "tomboy" out of his mouth. No mention of her clumsiness, her
inability to cook or swim. No mention of how slow she was. Just...concern. She
wanted to cry. Needed to. But not here. Not in front of Ranma. She did not need
his concern. She was not weak. She did not need him. No, she didn’t need him at
all..."That’s it," She said as she felt the burning rage gather up
inside her, "I don’t have to take this. I’m NOT YOUR FIANCEE
ANYMORE!" Akane summoned her mallet she swung with all her might…and
missed.
Ranma
dodged it, holding her fists under her chin cutely while her face held a
worried expression. "Please stop it Akane! You’re scaring me! You know I
hate violence!"
"How
did you-?" Ranma had never dodged the mallet before...Except...there was
one time...when he hit his head on a rock in the Koi pond, and he started
acting like a girl. Akane eventually caught him by surprise, but for the
longest time she couldn’t touch him... Akane let her mallet wink out of existance.
"Oh
dear! I’ve been out for a while haven’t I? I have all these new
memories…Mother! She doesn’t realize…Oh what will I do! I might have to leave
my family…Maybe your Father could adopt me, Akane. Then we could be
sisters!"
Akane walked off. Sisters!
That’s just what I don’t need: another sister.
"Don’t be angry Akane! I’m
me again! If you want I’ll leave it’s just…You and your family have been so
kind to me. I feel like I belong somewhere now."
Ranma’s
last words struck a chord with Akane. She whirled back: "I’m just SO happy
for you Ranma! I’m just SO goddamned happy that you found your little fucking
niche! Maybe we’ll throw a party tonight. Huray for
Ranma for belonging!"
"Akane,
please! I...I can’t do this without you!" Ranma pleaded. Akane could tell
though that this wasn’t the girly Ranma...it wasn’t normal Ranma either...
For a moment, Akane considered
letting it go. She considered telling him all about how it was the whole
business with his mother that was getting her upset and that she didn’t mean
what she said about him being a girly girl or anything else. She considered
this because looking a Ranma at that moment she realized that Ranma had always
been putting on an act ever since she’d known him and that this...this was the
real Ranma. But it was only a moment. After that she dismissed it with a wave
of her hand. "Too bad for you then." She said and she walked away.
This
time Ranma did not follow her.
~~~~~*~~~~~
It
was at that moment that Shampoo found Ranma, in girl form, looking curiously
distraught. Well, Shampoo thought with a grin, I’ll fix that.
Shampoo
prepared her glomp, visualizing her trajectory and making allowances for the
diminished mass of Ranma’s cursed form. "Wo de airen!" She cried as she launched from the ground. As
she reached the height of her jump she saw something astonishing happen. Ranma
changed from girl to boy in front of her eyes…without water. Excited, Shampoo
hugged Ranma even tighter than usual "Airen find cure! You give to Shampoo
yes?"
Immediately,
Shampoo realized something was wrong. She couldn’t put her finger on it…but it
had something to do with the sound Ranma was making. It wasn’t a human
sound...more like...purring…
Slowly,
timidly Shampoo released Ranma. No longer supported by her, he landed on all
fours on the concrete. A hungry look was in his eyes. Shampoo drew back
frightened. She knew that look…she’d seen it so often that very night. An
irrational fear filled her… a fear that gradually became something else.
Without quite knowing how it happened, Shampoo dimly realized that her head was
a little lower than Ranma’s… she was adopting The Position. Ranma slunk behind
her.
This is what I want right? Shampoo thought, This is Ranma… This
is my Airen right? NO! Shampoo shouted back at herself NO! This is NOT
Ranma. This is just another CAT. I am NOT a cat. But Ranma’s really human
right? It’s okay then isn’t it? NO! I am an AMAZON!
She
turned around and slashed at Ranma, claws ripping through his shoulder…Claws?
"Reeeoooooow!" Ranma screamed and jumped back. Then, he
crawled a little closer. "Mrowr?" He asked.
Get
away! She wanted to say. Instead she said "Ftttt!"
It sounded shockingly inhuman.
"Ryaow." Ranma commented and slunk away.
When
it was obvious Ranma wasn’t going to try anything, Shampoo sat back on her
haunches and started to clean herself. When she realized what she was doing,
she stopped... with some difficulty I am human. I am not a cat. I just have
to get up…But at the moment she couldn’t quite remember how. What was it
I wanted to do again? She looked around…She had to get away from where
there were humans…people She loped away from Ranma and the human and toward a
grassy area by a bridge. She needed to...what? Find food? No... that wasn’t it.
Maybe a nap? Yes that would be nice…She slowed down as she passed the small
bridge over the canal. The sun felt so nice on the grass here... Shampoo yawned
and curled her body as best she could. Soon she was fast asleep in the middle
of Nerima.
~~~~~*~~~~~
Ranma
fought the urge to pee along the wall. He knew that humans didn’t like that and
that the strange removable fur he had made marking territory a fruitless and
uncomfortable task. Stupid fur...it also prevented him from mating with the
female cat human. She was in heat, he could tell. And she was attracted to him.
Not only that, she was the same species both mind and body. She would have to
be won though. It wouldn’t be easy. Ranma’s keen eyes darted to Akane’s
retreating form. Easier than attempting to mate with his current girl human
though. It was obvious she felt no attraction to him even when he wasn’t a cat.
Some rival must have stolen her affections. If Ranma could’ve marked his
territory properly it would not have happened. "Mrowr."
Ranma said disconsolately. He checked his shoulder…just a scratch, only about
two centimeters deep. It should heal within a few days.
He
padded toward the girl human. She was running so it took a few seconds to catch
up to her. If Ranma had proper ears he would have flattened them. If he had a
tail he would have waved it. He wanted his human to know how displeased he was
with her. She had not given a decent petting since she lost her food preparing
challenge a couple weeks ago. Ranma, being a cat, wasn’t sure about the
particulars of the challenge but he knew enough about challenges in general to
know that Akane didn’t know when to pick her fights. Worse, his human even
tried to hurt him! He would have to get an exceptionally good petting to make
up for THAT!
Ranma
trotted leisurely beside Akane as she ran at her top speed. My girl human
would never make it as a cat, Ranma mused, She’d probably get killed
after trying to chase a car, thinking she was a dog.
Ranma
decided to risk acosting the human. "Meow?"
He asked.
"Oh
I guess you need me... to make you human again huh?"
"Meow," Ranma said as
if to say "No, why would you think that?"
"You don’t need...
me." Akane seemed to be talking as much to herself as to Ranma, speaking
in between her breaths. "You don’t need... anybody. You’re Ranma...
fucking.... Saotome! Heck, you can even... be your own date!"
"Meow?"
Ranma asked.
"Ranma."
Akane stopped and grabbed two hand fulls of Ranma’s
ink-black hair and moved his face toward hers-( Most lion tamers and zoo
keepers will no doubt tell you NOT to do this.) "Get this through your
thick, hollow skull. I do NOT want to talk to you. I don’t even want to LOOK at
you. I don’t care if you are a boy, a girl, a cat, or a reticulated python. I
just want to get to school... so I can pretend you don’t exist."
Ranma wasn’t entirely sure, but
he was beginning to think maybe the girl human didn’t want to play with
him...He decided to try one last maneuver. He rubbed his body along Akane’s
legs and purred.
"Arghhh!"
Akane exclaimed, exasperated. "Go home Ranma. Go home to your little
niche. I’m sick of this. I’m sick of all of it." She kicked him hard in
the ribs for emphasis and ran off.
Ow.
No the girl human didn’t want to
play anymore. Ranma would have to find another human. The cat human would be
nice, but she wasn’t in the mood just this moment. Perhaps the food preparing
human...but she was far away and the pain from the cat human’s claws and the girl
human’s shoe was beginning to irritate Ranma. The healer human? Yes he would do
nicely. Ranma scurried off. He loped for several blocks toward Tofu’s clinic,
then he stopped on a street corner and sat on his haunches. There was another
reason why he had to find the healer human…what was it? Ranma started to clean
himself as he considered the matter.
Then
suddenly his hand became a fist and hit his open palm. "That’s right! I’ve
gotta ask’m about what’s goin’ on with my curse!" Ranma looked around. He was
sitting on a street corner in the middle of Nerima. Some people were looking at
him oddly. Ranma slowly stood up. He winced. His shoulder hurt. Bad. "Arrgh! How’d this happen?" The answer came to him in a
flash of images… "Shampoo?" And then a fresh onslaught of blocked
memories hit him. He remembered all the times when he was a cat. When he had
first attacked Pops...when he had ‘kissed’ Akane (He realized now that his cat
side was making a desperate attempt to "mate" with her) Every embarrassing
moment came back and wouldn’t go away.
It
was weird. When he was a cat…everything he did made sense, even more than it
did when he was human. And yet he was doing the silliest things…like licking
himself at a public street corner. Then he remembered about being a girl.
Saying he was a woman, quitting the Art…picking out bras (Ranma shuddered at
this.) Again everything seemed so clear…he knew exactly what he wanted then.
Not like normal. Not like now.
He
looked at the cars stopping and going. Some of them turned right, some left,
some kept going straight… Where was RANMA going?
Feh! I’m goin’
ta Tofu’s! And then I’m gonna
get myself straightened out and I ain’t gonna have these weird thoughts no more.
Suddenly
Ranma had another weird thought: Which direction was Tofu’s Clinic?
Straight-ahead? Ranma ran off in this direction for a while but some how it
didn’t seem right. He doubled back and turned left and ran on for about five
minutes before thinking maybe he should have turned right... He was beginning
to get a little frustrated. He thought of Akane and made a right before he
should have. He thought of Shampoo and made a left for no reason. He thought of
Happosai and ran through a thin (only about 30 cm or so wide) concrete wall.
"DAMN YOU HAPPOSAI! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"
Ranma
paused.
He
forced himself to calm down.
He
looked around. He was at the Ladle Lady’s house. As if to emphasize Ranma’s
realization the lady splashed him straight on with ice cold water.
Ranma
didn’t change.
A
dim chorus of "Never gonna be a girl
again!" started up, but Ranma knew he wasn’t cured. It wasn’t that simple.
Then again, it never was.
I was just actin’ like Porkbrains there wasn’t I? And before...I was actin’ like Akane’s sisters! What the hell is goin’ on?
He
could feel them now…the cat and the girl…lurking within him… waiting for him to
relinquish control. Where had they come from? How did they get there? Who were
they? "Who am I?" Ranma asked himself. It was the question Happosai
had asked him five lifetimes and half an hour ago. Only now he wasn’t so sure
of the answer…
Tofu’s
clinic was only a couple more blocks away. Maybe he’d know.
~~~~~*~~~~~
Tofu
woke up in his bedroom above the clinic. His head was still pounding out the
bass line of the nightclub he and Kasumi went to that night. It was something
neither of them had ever done and if the hangover he was experiencing had
anything to say about it, they wouldn’t be doing it again anytime soon.
Unless
of course she wanted to.
Tofu
shoveled himself out of bed, smeared on his clothes from last night and
staggered downstairs.
Kasumi.
Kasumi! KASUMI! GODS! What a woman! How did he ever find her without scouring
the heavens and looking in every cloud for an angel? She made him so happy! She
was it! She was the one! Only this damn obligation of hers to her family… but
even that made her more appealing. He couldn’t help himself when he was near
her. The merest mention of her sent trills of insane pleasure down his body. He
wanted to hold her, to caress her, to kiss her, to tell her how he felt…only he
couldn’t because she asked him, BEGGED him, to wait until after her family got
over her mother’s death. He would sooner refuse a heavenly decree than the
gentlest of suggestions from Kasumi. Oh but it was so HARD, and finally,
FINALLY! His waiting was over. Now he could woo her, and pamper her, and treat
her like the princess she deserved to be.
He
shoved his hand in his pocket and looked at the photo sticker they had made of
themselves. She was so beautiful…
He
wanted to marry her right away, but she said last night that she wanted to
wait, and Tofu wasn’t about to push it. In his dream just now…she said the same
thing. But the Kasumi in his dream was just a face to say the words that he
needed to hear. She was no more the real Kasumi than Betty the skeleton was,
even if she seemed so incredibly like the original. Ranma was going through the
Ijuu. He was going to need Tofu’s help today.
But
why did it have to be TODAY?
Tofu
felt an urgent need to drink a few swimming pools full of water. Tofu put the
sticker back in his pocket and shuffled to the sink in his slippers. He downed
a few glasses off the tap, foreign microbes and added chemicals be damned, and
splashed himself in the face with another glass. This made him think of Ranma
again.
What
surprises were in store today? How would Ranma trump the numerous fiancées, the
oddball techniques... the eccentric foreign dignitaries with proclivities toward
kidnapping and finding new and interesting uses for kitchen utensils? It would
be worse than all that certainly. But how? The thought was a little
frightening. Tofu felt more than a little responsible for Ranma though. Even if
he hadn’t sworn to aid those in the Ijuu, he owed
Ranma something.
Kasumi
came by more and more often in the past two or three months. Tofu’s business
had predictably declined, but then so had Tofu’s...problem. The more Kasumi was
there the more sure he was that he COULD love her...and it would be okay. He
wanted so much to just kiss and hug her and... other things...but she was so
perfect that he didn’t dare sully her, didn’t dare smudge her porcelain skin
with his fingers that had touched a thousand others. He almost left town; his
work was suffering so much. Then, slowly she became, with frequent visits, less
an unapproachable being and more a caring goddess, a warm glowing presence in
the room whose touch... was a blessing bestowed on a sinner. He could now work
with her in the room without hurting his patients. In fact, sometimes he grew
even more skilled. And, Tofu learned, the reason why Kasumi could come over so
often was that Ranma’s mother, Nodoka, visited on weekends, and she insisted on
helping in the kitchen.
However,
he also learned that Nodoka caused Ranma a good deal of angst. He was almost
certain that Ranma going through the Ijuu now was, at
least in part due to Nodoka. Tofu paused, staring at the water faucet as he
considered... If Ranma was going through than the Ijuu,
then it meant that the source of Tofu’s happiness was bringing Ranma to the
brink of despair. The Ijuu would shake Ranma to his
very roots. Maybe even break him. Tofu didn’t know if he could deal with the
guilt that would cause.
Tofu
rubbed his eyes and put his glasses on. He had to get started soon. Feeling
marginally better with only an upset stomach and a cerebral elephant parade he
went to his library and pulled out three well-weathered volumes. He opened the
first: Selected Works of Franz Kafka and turned to the page in
Metamorphosis where the main character’s family first sees the cockroach he has
become. There he found a jagged, thin sliver of metal about the size of a
normal bookmarker. He placed this, with care, on the table by the books.
Tofu
remembered the story grimly...The father throws an apple at his transformed
son. The apple is embedded in the exoskeleton and the once-human roach slowly
dies, all the while trying to regain the acceptance of his family. In the end,
the family finds him dead on the floor of his room. A dried husk. This was one
possibility. A monster. An insect. And ultimately, a husk, a shell with no
life. Could it happen to Ranma?
Tofu
remembered the first time Ranma had visited with his mother. He was wearing a very
girlish skirt. He introduced Nodoka as his aunt in a frosty monotone. Tofu
recognized the soul of ice. Once they started talking more Ranma warmed up a
little but he was still so reserved, so lifeless...That could be his life. He
could become this Ranko person, and die inside
leaving only a husk...
Tofu
didn’t want to think of this. He opened the second book: Ovid’s
Metamorphosis. At the page with the passage describing how Tiresias is transformed into a woman when he disturbs two
mating snakes there was another sliver of metal, this one smooth and wavy. Tofu
smiled. He wondered often if there was a Tiresias, or
if Ovid or some other bard made up the story, not knowing that it was in fact
completely possible. The story amounted to a strange joke that served as an
explanation for how Tiresias, who served as seer in
reign of Oedipus, gained his powers of prophesy and his blindness. Supposedly
Zeus said that sex was more enjoyable for women and Hera
claimed it was the man who gained more pleasure from it. Zeus and Hera had made a bet. They asked the one person who had
known both sides, Tiresias. He answered that it was
better for women. Hera, in a rage, struck Tiresias blind. Zeus, to make up for his wife’s act, gave Tiresias the power to see into the future.
Enlightenment,
power, even godhood, these were also possibilities. Tofu could see Ranma
attaining these things too. But if he did...would he keep his innocence? Would
he still be human? And if so...would he be happy? Was Tiresias
happy?
After
placing this sliver next to the first he opened Lewis Carrol’s
Alice in Wonderland. This final sliver had both a wavy and a jagged edge.
It was found at a page near the beginning, where Alice hears the Caterpillar’s
question: "Who are you?"
Alice
isn’t sure. She says she might be someone else, a schoolmate, because the other
girl could never recite poetry and now Alice is having the same difficulty.
After a poetry reading and some questions the caterpillar gives Alice two
halves of a mushroom. One half makes her smaller the other bigger, but which
one?
What
would make Ranma more powerful? What would make him weaker? What Alice teaches
is that one should always start small. All things in moderation. Whichever
slice was which; it had to be consumed in small parts. Otherwise everything
would blow out of proportion, or slip quietly through the cracks in the earth.
Moderation. This was the main goal for anyone in the Ijuu.
Tofu
placed the last sliver in between the other two. It was the last piece to a
simple puzzle. The other two slivers fit the sides of the third perfectly and
when the puzzle was complete there was a yellow glow and the seams disappeared.
The three slivers had combined into a single metal sheet. The metal was black
with a blue iridescence and made the eyes search for mysteries and secrets
within its surface. Tofu knew its secrets, and how to unlock them.
Placing
his right hand on the cool, smooth, metal sheet, he cleared his throat and said
the Code: "Only one power…In all of the universe…That of thyself
known."
Glowing
a dark blue, the sheet rose, expanded, and thickened until it was the size of a
large cigar box. Aside from its eldritch nature and the vast importance of what
it held, that’s essentially what it was.
Inside
was one of the most powerful artifacts ever created.
Tofu
moved to open the lid but then decided against it. There was no telling what
form the artifact would take. It was something different each time it was
called, and if it were fragile…and Kasumi happened to show up at the wrong
moment…Tofu doubted anything would happen, but he still had attacks every now
and then, and he didn’t want to risk destroying the thing that might very well
save Ranma’s life. Instead, he set about making a cure for his hangover.
After
fifteen minutes or so of preparation, Tofu was just about to enjoy his first
sip of hangover cure tea when someone at the door knocked rather loudly.
Wincing at the pain this caused him, Tofu sipped at his tea.The
person on the other side of the door knocked again, louder this time. Tofu took
several large, quick gulps, burning his tounge. He
had put up a sign last night saying that the clinic would be closed today and
not to knock on the door. Couldn’t people read?
Of
course he HAD been a little drunk at the time...
~~~~~*~~~~~
Ranma
read the sign again: "Tofu clinic…scribble… for today. Please…scribble scribble … knock" He scratched his head, and then
knocked again a few times. Starting to get bored he decided on a shave and a
haircut pattern for variation. After trying that out he decided to do the same
thing only slower so he would get the point across. Just when he was about to
reach the ‘haircut’ bit again Tofu opened the door. Ranma stared. Tofu’s hair
was in disarray, his face unshaven and if he went to the airport with the bags
he had under his eyes he’d probably have to have them checked…
"Jeez, doc, ya
look like hell!"
Tofu
leaned in the doorway took his glasses off and rubbed the bridge of his nose.
"Thanks, Ranma. I was going to go for the Purgatory look, but then I
thought," He put his glasses back on, "why not go all out?" Then
he saw the four parallel, jagged tears in Ranma’s shoulder. Blood was seeping
out of the wounds. Ranma must have unconsciously slowed the bleeding with his
ki, but the wound would still need to be treated right away to guard against
infection. "You don’t look so good yourself," Tofu said with a smile
as he motioned Ranma in. "What was it," Tofu said the first thing
that came to his mind, "a cat fight?"
"Um
yeah…actually." Ranma walked inside, shucking his shoes off.
Tofu
raised an eyebrow as he shut the door and followed Ranma. "You were
fighting a cat?"
Ranma
turned at the entrance to Tofu’s office. "Yeah…uh…no…well sorta" He sat down on an examination chair. "It
was Shampoo."
"Hmm?"
Tofu looked closer at the claw mark. It started about ten centimeters down the
back of Ranma’s left shoulder and ended about three centimeters down in the
front. Ranma’s red shirt still blocked the view too much to tell how much
damage there was. "You mind if I tear this?"
"Huh?
Oh sure go ahead. S’already ruined anyway."
Nodding
Tofu tore the shirt from Ranma’s arm.
"OW!
The shirt! Not my skin!"
"Sorry,
some of the blood must have dried." It had to be done sometime and Tofu
was first and foremost a chiropractor, so he was used to doing painful
procedures quickly and when a patient didn’t expect it. He tore off the shirt
and threw the garment in the receptacle marked ‘BIOHAZARD.’ Tofu found this
oddly humorous, but Ranma didn’t share his feelings so he set about checking
his wound. What Tofu saw confirmed his suspicions and what Ranma said. It had
been a cat fight. The claw mark definitely started at the back and moved UP
which would have been impossible if Ranma had been standing upright. "You
were in Nekoken mode when this happened?"
"Yeah…so
was Shampoo."
"Shampoo
knows the Nekoken?"
"I
dunno doc, she just sorta
started actin’ like a cat when I did, but whatever it
was it was a lot like the Nekoken."
"You
remember this?"
"Yeah.
I remember all of it…only it’s like a dream or somethin’.
Wait a minute…cats. CATS! I can actually say it! They don’t scare me no
more!"
"That’s
rather odd, why do you think that is?"
"Feh, prolly ‘cause I know I can
kick all their asses!" Ranma frowned. There was a pause before Ranma
continued. "A lot of strange stuff’s been happenin’
all day, doc. Stranger than usual ya know? And that’s
sayin’ somethin’."
"Hmm…"
Tofu got a small basin from a cabinet under the sink and started to fill it
with warm water, "So, what’s been going on?" Tofu asked.
Ranma
sighed. Tofu thought he might be imagining it, but he could swear his posture
changed slightly. Ranma’s finger went to the bridge of his nose and wavered
there. It was a gesture Tofu himself did upon occasion when he was nervous and
didn’t have his glasses...on. "It all began earlier this morning..."
Ranma boomed with a deep throaty voice.
"Heh
heh. That’s a pretty good impression of your father,
Ranma."
Ranma
jumped. His eyes were wide. "Not him too..." he whispered.
Not him too Ranma said. That meant there were other times he acted like other
people. That meant also that it had NOT been intentional. Tofu swallowed. The Ijuu occured differently for
different people. Tofu’s own Ijuu was harowing, but relatively uncomplicated. Ranma, however, was
going through the worst kind of Ijuu anyone could
expect to survive. He brought the basin and sponge and started to wash the
dried blood off Ranma’s back...carefully and keeping a lookout for the slightest
change in personality "What happened, Ranma?"
And
as Tofu cleaned and dressed Ranma’s wound, Ranma told him. He told him,
reluctantly, about helping Kasumi by cooking breakfast, about changing forms
without water, about Happosai, and finally about Shampoo. Tofu felt though,
that Ranma was leaving something out. Just as he finished with Ranma’s wound he
thought of what it might be. "Why weren’t you with Akane when you came
here?"
Ranma’s
mood darkened immediately. "I…she…she was different today. Mean. Remember
that night you made my legs go out...and she...she picked me up then but...
she’s different now...she doesn’t..." Ranma inhaled sharply and looked
into Tofu’s eyes with an almost angry expression. "She told me she didn’t wanna see me no more." Ranma looked down at his feet
as he raggedly let the air out of his lungs. His hair turned from black to red
before she started crying.
Tofu
was not a psychologist. He read up on it to try to cure himself of his Kasumi
fits when they got bad, and he knew how to read auras and note mood changes and
such fairly well, but beyond the research he had done for this he didn’t know
much. It would be, perhaps more accurate to say that he KNEW a lot about
psychology, but he didn’t UNDERSTAND it. He couldn’t USE it at all. Someone has
a broken arm you take an x-ray, look at it, and see what the problem is. But
you couldn’t SEE psychology. Only it’s effects. Trying to be a psychologist
seemed to Tofu to be depressingly like trying to dissect the wind. He was
supposed to help Ranma with the more superficial problems of the Ijuu. Someone else was supposed to take care of the rest.
But...in the end Ranma was a patient, and more than that a friend. So Tofu said
reluctantly "Ranma…do you want to talk about it?"
Ranma
turned her tear stained eyes toward Tofu again "T-Tofu?"
"Yes?"
"Did
you know that Akane…had a crush on you?"
Tofu
slowly nodded. He had suspected it, but he was almost ten years older than
Akane. He knew her when she was in kindergarten. The idea that he would be
attracted to Akane was ridiculous. Of course, Kasumi was only older by three
years, even if she was extremely…mature for her age. For some reason, though,
he always saw Kasumi as being as old, if not older, than he was. She carried
about her a mystery that smacked of years of experience. It was one of the
reasons he was crazy about her. But Akane…she was just a little kid…who got
assaulted by boys who wanted to date her…and wound up in his office, where he
would treat her wounds. Tofu understood this. But he had always figured the
best way to deal with the situation was to ignore it.
His
father warned him about it. "Ono, my boy," he would say, "be
careful when you treat girls, a doctor’s office can be a aphrodisiac for them
if their day hasn’t been that good. If you’re ever in doubt, get a female nurse
or doctor to treat them." Tofu was careful, but he couldn’t bring himself
to treat girls like they had cooties or something just because they might be
attracted to him. Still...Suddenly Tofu had an odd thought. Ranma was currently
female. Check. She was having a bad day. Check. He was treating her. Check. She
was acting strange. Check check CHECK!
And why would she bring up Akane’s crush? Tofu sat down on the bed next to
Ranma. The Ijuu was truly a scary scary
thing.
"You
know…she was growing her hair out long for you."
"I…didn’t
know, no." He had thought she was just trying to emulate her oldest
sister. That was understandable. Kasumi was after all perfection.... but of
course other people didn’t see Kasumi the Tofu did. And Akane’s personality was
still very much that of a tomboy.
"Well
when it got cut, she could’ve let it grow back right? But she didn’t."
Tofu
frowned. "I don’t understand."
"I
think she didn’t grow it out again because I said it was cute."
Tofu
turned toward Ranma, still confused. He saw her wipe another tear from her face
before she looked down again.
"It’s…
been gettin' longer recently."
"Oh."
At first Tofu didn’t see what Ranma meant, and then all that she had said sunk
in. "Oh GODS! I’m so sorry Ranma!" Tofu realized why Ranma was
crying. Even he had seen signs that Akane wasn’t acting the same toward Ranma.
He tried to imagine how he’d feel if Kasumi…but thankfully he couldn’t imagine
that and he hoped he’d never need to experience it. But though he felt for
Ranma, he didn’t have any words of solace to give or any way of making the
situation better…damn psychology...except perhaps by offering a distraction…
"Ranma…I
have something for you. It might take your mind off things for a bit."
"Um…okay."
"It’s
just in the other room," Tofu said as he stood up from behind Ranma and
walked toward the door. "I’ll be right back." Tofu noticed Ranma’s
bare female chest. "I’ll get a shirt for you too while I’m at it." He
mumbled and left…
~~~~~*~~~~~
Tofu
came back with a shirt and the multidimensional cigar box. He got the distinct
feeling that something was wrong. He called out "Ranma? Are you okay in
there?"
"Sure,
babe, why don’t you come inside so you can see the view?"
The
tone was icy cold. Tofu thought of Kafka. Of the cockroach. Of Death. Yes
something was definitely wrong. He probably shouldn’t go in the room. It was
probably extremely dangerous. Tofu might even die. Yes, it would probably be
best if he just left for awhile…
Tofu
went into the room.
"Like
what you see?" Ranma gestured to her completely naked body. "I might
as well tell you that I find you attractive, since there’s no point in my
raising a fuss about being a man. How could I be a man? The only woman I ever
loved hates me. "
Tofu
was a doctor. The naked body didn’t normally phase him, unless he thought of
someone whose name begins with ‘Ka.’ Tofu looked straight into Ranma’s eyes.
"Ranma, listen to yourself. This is not you."
"Oh?
Who is it then? No Tofu you’re wrong. It IS me. It’s ALWAYS been me. But my
honor, my petty need for human contact has kept me in check. Well fuck that.
Who will give me what I need? Pop? Don’t be ridiculous. Mom? She’d rather kill
me. Akane? She just wants me dead. You? You love Kasumi, and that takes care of
her too. Nabiki sees me as a piece of ass, Shampoo, Kodachi,
and Ukyo all want me as some trophy they can fuck when they get bored. Tell me,
Tofu, what reason do I have not to kill every last one of you?"
This
WAS bad. Tofu murmured something under his breath: "At my darkest hour, I
shall become a pillar of light. At my darkest hour I shall wade through time,
and in the murky depths of despair I will find truth."
"Yes
lets look at the truth shall we. Cold, hard, facts. Here I am sitting naked in
your office and no one else is here...whose to say we aren’t being
naughty?"
"Stop
this Ranma!" Tofu pleaded. This was getting out of hand. This wasn’t what
he was good at. He closed his eyes and forced himself to say something,
anything to get Ranma to stop. "You are being more positively STUPID now
than you have ever been! I DO love you! You’re like a little brother, heck
maybe someday you’ll BE my brother…or sister… it doesn’t matter. If it wasn’t
for you I could have never have been able to stay with Kasumi. She loves you
too I know it! Your father is misdirected, but if he didn’t care about you why
would he bother with you at all? And your mother doesn’t know you’re her son!
She might yet welcome you! I can’t speak for your fiancées but I’m sure they
aren’t as bad as you make them out to be. If you want love Ranma look around!
Don’t close your eyes because of one instance of unrequited affection!"
The tension in the room eased in the silence that followed.
Finally
Ranma closed her eyes, shook her head, and spoke, "You do raise one or two
good points. I’ll think about it. Are you going to give me the shirt or shall
we continue as we are?"
Tofu
tossed the shirt to Ranma. It was a black T-shirt that Tofu usually wore under
his gi when the weather got colder. "So...you say you’ve been having these
mood swings since this morning huh?"
Ranma
paused and gave Tofu a flat, you-must-be-joking look. "Tofu, I think you
and I both know this is more than just a mood swing."
Tofu
nodded gravely. If it weren’t for the different timbre and the fact that Ranma
was sitting right in front of him Tofu would have sworn that Nabiki had just
said that.
"What
was that you were saying earlier?" Ranma asked after she pulled shirt on
over her head, "It sounded like an incantation or a ritual…Do you belong
to some secret society or something?"
Tofu
grimaced. Ranma was always observant, Akane told him once how Ranma had known
he was a martial artist. There had been other times when uncanny intelligence
peeped through. Coming up with the last move of the Hiryuu
Shoten Ha on his own for instance. But Tofu was never
there when it happened, and he could never be sure whether it was just some
chance inspiration. Now there wasn’t any doubt, no one could so successfully be
Nabiki, unless they were at least as intelligent as Nabiki. "Well...I
can’t deny it."
Ranma
started to get extremely red in the face… "Oh! I’ve behaved so rudely! How
could I do such a thing?" She put on the boy’s underwear and pants hurriedly.
"I do hope I can get this problem worked out. I hate having to wear these
icky clothes!"
Tofu
cocked an eyebrow. "Are you... Ranko now?"
Tofu asked.
Ranma
stiffened, "Please don’t call me that, Tofu-sensei. I positively hate that
name! I can’t be anything more than a niece to my mother because of it. Ranma’s
a nice name for a girl too, just call me that okay?"
Tofu
nodded slowly. This personality was different from the others Tofu had seen. It
was somehow more real than the others were. It wasn’t just the change in
attitude; it was the exagerated femininity, mixed
with odd similarities to Ranma’s normal personality. The brightness of the
eyes, the friendliness in the voice, and even the smile, though somehow that
was both the same AND different. It wasn’t quite a cocky smirk. It was more
full, a little sad perhaps, and somehow...peaceful. "Okay. Ranma, do you
remember why you came here?"
"Yes,
I do. It’s all so scary! All these other personalities in control! I’m glad you
didn’t see what happened this morning! Poor Grandfather Happosai almost died! I
wish they’d all just go away. The bad ones anyway. I guess I don’t mind acting
like Ucchan or Kasumi-oneechan
every now and then… I just want a pass so I don’t have to go to school. I
couldn’t stand it if I hurt someone else."
School…after
the surreality of what had just happened it was
difficult to imagine such a banal concept. "I’ll…write you a pass, don’t
worry…Ranma, you said you wouldn’t mind acting like Kasumi or Ukyo… aren’t
there some other personalities you don’t mind?"
"Well,
I guess I do kind of like acting like Nabiki, though she’s kind of sneaky. But
I don’t like the others. Even Akane…she’s my best friend, but I don’t want to
act like her."
"What
about Ranma…I mean your main personality?"
"I’m
sorry, Tofu-sensei, I don’t understand. I’m Ranma. I’m the main
personality!"
"Nani?"
This threw Tofu for a loop.
"You’ll
have to forgive me, I keep forgetting that everyone thinks I’m a boy. That
Ranma isn’t the real me. That’s not even a personality like the others. That
Ranma is just me, only more confused and turned around. That Ranma is just the
chains that I had to put on to survive with Mr. Octopus Face, excuse me" Ranma
giggled, "my father."
"But,
weren’t you born a boy?"
"I
suppose…I really don’t have any memories before ‘Pus-face took me on that awful
training trip, and most of that is like something out of a dream. You know my
life, Tofu-sensei, anything is possible. Even if I was born a boy, that hardly
matters. I’m a woman now. When Akane knocked me into the pond it all became
clear to me. Everything fell into place. I woke up from that terrible nightmare
and I felt free for the first time in all my life. Then when she knocked me
back it clouded over again." Ranma’s expression darkened a little,
"Akane’s my best friend, but she can be… irritating at times."
Ranma
was giving a disturbingly convincing argument. There was something that
bothered Tofu a bit though. "something out of a dream"...Hadn’t
Ranma said the same thing about being in the Nekoken? And didn’t Ranma BELIEVE
that he was a cat when he was in the Nekoken? Also there was an
inconsistency...Akane. "I don’t mean to pressure you, Ranma, but this is
all coming out of left field for me here. Just a little while ago you said you
loved Akane, and now you’re saying she’s your best friend. Now I know that you
weren’t talking about friendly, platonic love before…"
"Tofu-sensei…I’d
really rather not talk about that…"
"I’m
sorry but it’s kind of important."
"Can’t
it wait? I’m really not in the mood to discuss it right now…"
"I
just want to know…"
"Look,
back off okay? If I’m a girl and I love another girl whadya
think that makes me?"
Ranma
was back. Or was SHE gone again?…
"Are
you a girl, Ranma?"
"Hell
no!…DAMMIT! This is freakin’ me out! "
Tofu’s
headache never had completely gone away, and now it was returning with a
vengeance. "To tell you the truth, Ranma, it’s freaking me out too."
Tofu realized he still had the metal cigar box in his other hand. He handed it
carefully to Ranma. "Here you go. Open it, but be careful. I’m not sure
what it will look like or how you will need to use it, but I can’t let you
leave here without it. Not after what I just saw you go through."
Ranma
looked at the box but did not open it. "Huh? This got somethin’
ta do with all the weird shit in my brain?"
"Yes,
it is called the Saiserefu Noon."
Ranma
looked at the box again. "What’s wrong with me, doc? I wanna
trust ya but I get edgy when people hide stuff from
me."
Tofu
sighed. He had been hiding the name of Ranma’s predicament from him since he
got there. If he told it to him, that one piece of information could tip the
sensitive scales of fate against Ranma. But if he didn’t, Ranma might do
something…rash. "Ranma, what you are going through is...the Ijuu."
"The
migration? What the hell does a migration got to do with going psycho at a pin
drop?"
"It’s
an analogy of sorts. Just as birds migrate south when the weather gets too
cold, so the aspects of your soul change location when your emotional
environment becomes too perilous."
"Jeez
what idiot came up with that one?"
Tofu
grimaced"Well there’s more to it than
that...besides, it’s better than ‘Royal Chestnuts on an Open Fire Fist’"
Tofu defended.
Ranma
nodded and opened the box. She started laughing.
"What’s
so funny, Ranma?"
"Aw
come on, this is a joke right? Where’s the real Saise-watchamacallit?"
"I’m
afraid that’s it."
Ranma
stopped laughing. She looked inside the box again. "You sure?"
"Yes."
"What
the hell is this then!" Ranma took the Saiserefu
Noon out of the box.
Tofu
looked closer, adjusting his glasses. It was a pair of butterfly earrings, made
from the same strange metal as the box. They glowed an eerie blue and were very
beautiful. "It looks like a pair of pretty earrings." Tofu commented.
"I
KNOW that! What am I s’posed ta
do with ‘em?"
Tofu
noticed something he overlooked before…They were made for pierced ears.
Tofu
swallowed. He turned around. He found a sturdy section of wall and butted it
with his head repeatedly in frustration. Why was this proving so difficult?
"Hey
Tofu, man, stop doin’ that, you’re gonna damage somethin’"
Tofu
stopped, resting his forehead on the wall. "Sorry, Ranma, this hasn’t been
that great a morning for me either."
"Hey,
no problem, believe me, I understand. But…how’re we gonna
deal with this? I mean even if I wanted ta I couldn’t
wear these things."
"I
don’t know, Ranma." Tofu sighed, turned around and slid his back down the
wall so that he was sitting facing Ranma. He took his glasses off and rubbed
his aching temples with his thumb and middle finger. "All I know is I
can’t let you leave here without them on. It’s too dangerous."
Ranma
looked at the earrings in the palm of her hand. While Tofu was mainly a
chiropractor, he was also licensed as a general practitioner. Chances are there
would be something to pierce ears with and if Ranma couldn’t leave without
having the earrings on…Yes, there was really only one thing she could do…
"So,
Doc, where’m I gonna
sleep?"
~~~~~[END]~~~~~
Thanks to everyone who gave me
C&C Especially NemesisZero and Bjorn.