Keaton's Custard-Pies

The art of making and throwing them
as told by Buster Keaton.


Never in any of his own films did Keaton throw a pie, but…. He however knew all about them! In his first film with Roscoe Arbuckle, 'The Butcher Boy' he came into contact with them and in 'The Garage' Keaton lobbed one at Arbuckle missing him and hitting the car he was cleaning. Later in Buster's career he threw them on TV in the Ed Wynn show and had a technicolor pie fight with a young Alice Faye in 'Hollywood Cavalcade'. As Keaton said in his ghost written autobiography in 1960,

"I had not thrown a custard-pie for years and lost no time in getting in some practice when not busy on the set.

I started by drawing a circle on the wall in white chalk, this was the approximate size of Alice Faye's lovely blonde head. I used a wooden plate as my practice "pie". When this proved too light I kept on driving nails into it until it weighed about as the custard-pies Roscoe, Al StJohn and I had so much fun throwing at one another in the old days. I practiced throwing the plate from various distances. I have always considered myself the world's champion custard-pie thrower, and slowly my old marksmanship returned."

Buster had the studio's bakers make up pies the same way as in his throwing days. Two crusts cooked until they were brittle and then pasted one inside the other with a paste of flour and water. The double crust prevented the pie from crumbling or the thrower's fingers going through as they slid across the bottom of the pie just prior to delivery. A tin pie-plate was never used for fear of injuring the recipient.

The piecrust was then filled with an inch deep mixture of good sticky flour and water paste, the topping depending on the recipient! For blondes or someone wearing light clothing, blackberries, strawberries or chocolate liberally garnished the top, for brunettes a lemon meringue topping was substituted in both cases the confection was finished off with a liberal layer of whipped cream.

The first pie from Buster Alice Faye was to receive was a shot putt, that is to say the shortest throw from between three to six feet. Buster was concerned about this, as he went on to say,

"I worried about her flinching. Besides spoiling the shot, this would mean hours of delay while Alice took a shower, got a whole new make-up job, a hairdo, and was fitted for duplicate clothes outfit.

I decided not to warn her when the great moment approached. After talking it over with Dwan, we placed George Givot, who was playing the villain, between Alice and me. Givot faced me, but Alice standing right behind him was faced in the opposite direction. Givot was told he should turn the girl around slowly as I started to say my line, which was "We will see who gets the girl!" He would hold her in front of him using her as a shield. After timing this using another girl for Alice, I suggested that if the word 'now' where added, it would give me time to deliver the pie at the right split second.

When we made the shot Givot turned Alice round too quickly, which forced me to speed up my throw. Consequently the pie hit her in the face harder than was necessary.

You never saw a more stunned looking girl in your life than Alice Faye that day. We required no retake, but Alice did not thank me for that. As the camera was being moved to the next location I saw her go over to a table on which the pies for the other scenes were waiting to be used. Alice picked one up and weighed it in her hand, then tried several others. When she found one she liked, she headed towards me on the run. I leaped up and ran, but Alice chased me off the sound stage and clear out of the studio holding all the while that menacing custard-pie in her hand."

Buster taught pie-throwing technique to Ed Wynn on his show. The different throws, as used in the old days, Buster explained, were -

1) The Walking Thrust - Walk up to the person, push the pie in their face and before you walk away give it a slight twist. This makes the sticky part of the pie cling to the recipient.

2) The Shot Putt - Thrown straight from a distance of three to five feet.

3) With shots over eight feet, you need to make sure the pie is of the right weight to fly perpendicular as it leaves your fingers.

4) The Ancient Roman Discus Throw - The most beautiful delivery of them all. Spin half way round turning the pie as you whirl and then let go, hitting the victim square in the face.

5) Catchers Throw to Second Base - The hardest of all. Pull back your arm just as far as it will go, and then bring the pie in all the way from East St.Louis - and let 'er go!

A suggestion from Buster for beginners though - "Don't try it in the house"

 

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