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A Hawaiian Love Story With certain things, such as friendship or love, it is best to see with your heart...and not with your eyes. Anonymously shared with me, this sweet story is one I adapted, altering identifying details to ensure a modicum of privacy, as well as to help fulfill a "Magnificent Obsession." I think you will find its heartwarming effects unaffected... P ila stood up from the bench, straightened his Aloha shirt, and studied the crowd of people making their way through the Ala Moana Shopping Center. He looked for the girl whose heart he knew, but whose face he did not, the girl with white ginger blossoms in her hair.H is interest in her began almost a year before on the Big Island of Hawai`i, when he was home for a short vacation to visit family in Hilo. Being lulled to sleep by the gentle patter of Hilo's nightly rain, breathing in the cleansed air imbued with the fragrance of flowers, and surrounded by the warmth of his family and friends, Pila's days there were extraordinarily restful and rejuvenating.The stresses of the past year had yielded to the soft, yet dynamic energy of the `aina (land, sea, air). There was something magically healing about being back home … On his last full day there, he was inexplicably drawn to the public library, where the Friends of the Library were having their annual book sale. A large book, `Ôlelo No`eau: Hawaiian Proverbs & Poetical Sayings by Mary Kawena Pukui had called to him from an upper-most shelf. Holding on to the bookshelf with one hand and extending his opposite arm as high as it would stretch -- and on tiptoes --, Pila gingerly nudged the hefty book off the shelf with the tips of his fingers.
Most of us are not around to witness the moments that decide our fate, much less observe the sequence of events that leads up to that riveting, life-transforming moment in each life. For Pila, a singular event was about to begin that sequence: The book fell, unceremoniously striking his head, before crashing to the floor. Fate was poised and ready to proceed, and boinking Pila on the head was its quick way to command his attention. Stooping to pick up the book which lay open on the floor, Pila found his attention drawn to `ôlelo no`eau (wise saying) # 282: E hiolo ana nâ kapu kahiko; The ancient kapu will be abolished;the heiau and altars will fall; the islands will be united. A prophecy uttered by Kapihe, a kahunain Kamehameha's time. He looked out through the broad expanse of windows before him. There was Ka Pôhaku Naha -- the famous Naha Stone -- just outside the library.He bought the book, thinking, "Not exactly a pocketbook, but this'll be a good read on the plane. It'll get back me back in touch…" For the past eight years, Pila had been preoccupied with the rigorous academic pursuit of his professional degree. He had distanced himself not only physically from Hawai`i, but also from its traditions and ways; its open and expressive warm heart, the Hawaiian culture; and its life-affirming soul, the Hawaiian language and its thinking.On his way out of the library, he stopped to visit with Ka Pôhaku Naha. He reverently placed his hands on the sun-warmed stone, closed his eyes and felt its mana, just as he did as a boy. He leaned toward the stone, listening intently to what Ka Pôhaku Naha had to say to him.<silence> "Ka Pôhaku Naha, your silence -- your stony silence -- is deafening today. Won't you speak with me?" telepathed Pila to the stone. He smiled at the stone, laughing inside, thinking, "What would my hard-core science-oriented professors make of my little conversation with you?" Pila knew the answer: "If a phenomenon is neither observable, nor measurable, its occurrence is not amenable to the application of the scientific method. Incapable of yielding to stringent scientific analysis, such a phenomenon is neither credible, nor valid." They'd playfully tease him that all that poi he had consumed at home had gummed up his brain's neural circuitry, or that dreaded disease, "Polynesian Paralysis" had left him daft and regressing back to his native mumbo-jumbo beliefs. Pila's spirit knew better, as when Pila was a boy, his Tûtû Kâne (Grandpa) had taught him early and well to inwardly listen to what the stones had to say. One day, Tûtû Kâne had brought him to Ka Pôhaku Naha to introduce him to the massive rectangular boulder, which weighs nearly 5,000 pounds."It was prophesied in ka wâ kahiko (the ancient days)," said Tûtû Kâne, "that someone would one day overturn the stone." Tûtû Kâne passed on to Pila the story about this feat of superhuman strength and divine assistance, which would identify the powerful person who would quell all foes, unite, and bring the eight major Hawaiian islands under one rule.In 1772, Tûtû Kâne told Pila, a courageous fourteen-year old boy-warrior from Kohala not only turned the stone over, but lifted it end over end, fulfilling that ancient prophecy, as well as his divine destiny to become King Kamehameha the Great. As did every kid who visited the huge stone, knowing of its story, little Pila placed his hands on Ka Pôhaku Naha and pushed on it with all of his might. When it did not budge, he asked Tûtû Kâne to help him. Even with the help of his powerful grandfather, who pushed alongside him with histrionic huffing and puffing and groaning and grunting, the reclined stone firmly held its ground. Flushed and winded, young Pila put his ear to the stolid stone, then, looking up to his grandfather, told him, "Ka Pôhaku Naha spoke to me, inside, loud and clear. Tûtû Kâne, Ka Pôhaku Naha says he's comfortable, exactly where he is." Pila smiled to himself, patting his heart. Fond memories of his happy childhood made him do that. He wistfully remembered the wonderment of the experiential learning that accompanied each of his grandfather's mo`olelo (stories). In keeping with the Hawaiian values instilled in him as a boy by example and by mo`olelo, Pila was silently thanking his Tûtû Kâne, who was now his `aumakua (guardian spirit) on The Other Side, when suddenly, he felt light-headed. "Likely an after-effect -- a mild concussion, perhaps? --of that blow I took on the head," thought his clinically trained mind. Laying the book on the stone, he leaned on it with his hands on both sides of the book, and bending over, spread his legs apart. Blood rushed back to his head, keeping him from passing out. Breathing in and out, slowly and deliberately, he began to regain himself. When his head stopped spinning, he noticed the riffling of the book's stiff pages by the lively mauka (mountain) breeze blowing down Wai`anuenue Avenue to the sea at Hilo Bay. Spread-eagled against the stone with his head just above the book, his eyes caught the delicate notes penciled into the margins of the dancing pages. Plopping down on the grass fronting the stone, Pila lifted the book onto his folded knees and began studiously leafing through it. He found himself intrigued, not only with its words and dramatic Dietrich Varez illustrations, but particularly, the penciled notes. The soft, flowing handwriting reflected a thoughtful soul; its notes, an insightful mind. Inscribed on a front flyleaf was this handwritten message: This book, `Ôlelo No`eau, is one of two identical gifts independently given to me by dear friends upon my graduation from UH Hilo -- puke mâhoe (twin books), if you will. To have one `Ôlelo No`eau is to be blessed and gifted well; to be twice gifted by it is to be doubly blessed, as it affords an opportunity to share this treasure trove with someone else. Hawaiians look down on wasting, and for one person to keep both is a wasteful extravagance. Hawaiians believe in sharing with others, even perfect strangers, and not hoarding just for oneself. Wishing this book to remain a gift of the heart and in keeping with the spirit of the Magnificent Obsession, I am donating it to the Friends of the Library as a makana hele (parting gift) for their fundraising book sale. It is a small token of pâna`i (reciprocity) for the countless blissful hours I have spent in the Hilo Public Library. To you who hânai'd (adopted) this book and is now reading these words: May you, its new steward, fully embrace the beauty of its Hawaiian words, savoring their poetical imagery and absorbing its profound wisdom as happily as I have. Until a few moments ago, I vacillated between them; choosing which mâhoe (twin) to pass on to you has not been easy. Finally, I chose this one. As you can see by its dog-eared pages, highlighting, penned asterisks, and scribbles in the margins, I have spent much time with it. It is infused with my Aloha, as I have caressed and loved it well. I commend this book, along with my fingerprints, my dogs' pawprints, a few coffee stains (Oops!), pressed flowers and leaves, bookmarks, and most of all, my mana. Caress it often and mâlama (take care of) it well. I shall be doing the same with its mâhoe (twin), to be freed from its plastic shrink-wrap soon after this twin has left us to begin its lifetime journey with you. May you lose your heart to its inner beauty and bountiful treasure. `O au iho nô, me ke Aloha pumehana a me hau`oli nui, It was dated just a week before. Just then Pila distinctly heard the command, "E kelepona. (Call)." Ka Pôhaku Naha had spoken. Pila looked up to see that there was a phone booth a few feet away, across the driveway. He found three La'imana listings in the island's phone directory. The first phone number connected him straight-away to her father in Puna, Andy, who answered Pila's query with, "Leilani? She's my daughter. Lei left for Honolulu last week." Proudly, he added, "She's starting graduate school." "Talking story" (Chatting), Pila learned that Leilani's father knew Pila's grandfather, and in fact, he, Pila, was Leilani's calabash cousin (relative by marriage)! Leilani's cousin had married Pila's second cousin. It's true: in Hawa`i, if you keep talking story long enough, degrees of separation evaporate quickly. Andy did not hesitate in sharing his daughter's new address with Pila. Pila was, after all, `ohana (family). Calabash, yes, but definitely `ohana. Pila wrote the Mânoa address into the book beneath Leilani's inscription. The next morning, `Ôlelo No`eau in hand, Pila boarded the plane to journey back for his final year of formal training. On that long flight, he wrote Leilani a letter, introducing himself, thanking her for sharing her book with him. He assured her that he would be a good steward; he would mâlama (care for) it well. "I am embarrassed to admit to you, Leilani, how out-of-touch I am with all things Hawaiian," he wrote. "Your book will help me find my way back to my cultural heritage -- back to my roots. To quote from your book: E kolo ana no ke êwe i ke êwe. Of the same origin, kinfolk will seek and love one another." He invited her to e-mail him, that is, if she were on-line. She wasn't. But touched by the sincerity of his words, she overcame her technophobia and signed on with an Internet service. Besides, she was curious to learn more about this new steward of her makana hele (parting gift). Leilani is a popular Hawaiian name, as is Lei, her nickname. Both names were already claimed by other subscribers. She recalled how her dad would croon the song, "Sweet Leilani," to her, and she settled on "sweetlei" as her computer name.Fumbling with the tangle of phone and computer cords, then stumbling through the sign-up maze, Leilani, with a trusty "Computer for Dummies" book in hand, successfully managed to send an e-mail to "puleoo" -- Pila's computer name, meaning "mature prayer". Pule `o`o is the nickname of Moloka`i, Leilani's favorite island, which was known in ancient times for its powerful prayers.Pila was researching data on the Internet, when his computer signaled that he had mail. To Leilani's surprise, he immediately replied! Flurries of e-mail exchanges ensued. Leilani signed her messages with * :^ ) [happy girl with a flower in her hair]; Pila, with 8-) [happy guy with glasses].They enlivened their messages with Hawaiian interjections, like "Hô!" and "`Auê!" , and liberally peppered their messages with sayings from their twin `Ôlelo No`eau.They scoured their books for Hawaiian witticisms and euphemisms, gesticulating with their own Hawaiian cyber-lingo: <AOL> = "`aka`aka (laughing) out loud," <ROFLMOO> = "rolling on the floor, laughing my `okole (butt) off"), <`olê`olê> = <grin>, and <mino`aka> = <smile>.They discovered that they shared common passions: Hawaiian and classical music, hiking, camping, gardening, dogs, dancing, and food -- glorious, beautiful food! They rhapsodized over guava chiffon and dobash cakes, Hawaiian kûlolo and haupia, Japanese saimin and sushi, Chinese crispy gau gee mein and dim sum, Portuguese bean soup and malasadas, and Italian pastas and cioppino.They reminisced about their wahi pana (cherished places): Moloka`i, Mauna Kea Pond, Kalapana, Kapoho, Honoli`i, and Waipi`o, each making the other hopelessly homesick.People-loving, they moved easily in several large circles of friends; they discovered that they shared a surprising number of mutual friends. Yet, introspective by nature, both enjoyed solitary pursuits in private spaces -- Leilani, a reader, who sought out the simplicity and peace of country life, and Pila, a slack key guitarist, who could sit under a tree for hours on end, strumming and picking. `Ohana (Family) was especially dear to each, as were close-knit friends in their inner circles, which they consciously kept small and intimate to avoid being spread too thinly. Both had developed a prudent cautiousness with strangers, commiserating over the times they had been burned by those who cavalierly -- and at times, intentionally -- took advantage of their Hawaiian nature of being trusting, accepting, and generous. Self-confessed born optimists, they agreed that such experiences were learning opportunities to acquire compassion, appreciate their Hawaiian identity, and grow spiritually. In spite of optimism's liabilities, they chose to see life's glass as half full, if not, brimming over. Disciplined and dedicated to excellence in their endeavors, others saw them as "workaholics." Unknown to those who saw them only on weekdays, both were "crashers and burners" on Saturday, becoming ultimate sloths. But by Sunday, revived, they were celebrating life and nature, by reveling in the great out-of-doors with gusto. Pila helped Leilani overcome her homesickness for her family, dogs, and home island; Leilani brought welcomed island warmth and cheer to Pila's cold midwestern winter days and nights with her care packages filled with Hawaiian music CDs, his favorite macadamia nuts, Kona coffee, Merrie Monarch Hula Festival videotapes, and homemade `ono sweets and treats.Pila gave Leilani encouragement and moral support, when she slaved over her books, preparing for her final exams; Leilani did the same for Pila, for his board exams.They discovered webpages with links to Hawaiian-themed postcards and greetings and sentiments in Hawaiian. In time, the sharing of their woes -- and joys -- brought their hearts and minds closer and closer together, with the sayings from their twin books serving as catalysts in the expression of their innermost thoughts and feelings with akaka (clarity).Each message was a seed falling on a fertile heart. A romance was budding in cyberspace.
In January, Pila sent Leilani this cybercard: http://hawaiianlanguage.com/alohacard.html .In February, on Valentine's Day, Leilani sent Pila this Hawaiian Valentine's Mini-Lesson: http://hawaiianlanguage.com/lv-mini-lesson.html .In March, in spite of his demanding schedule, Pila was setting aside time everyday to learn Hawaiian on the Internet and listen to Hawaiian music.Like other awakening êwe hânau o ka `âina (natives of the land -- those born and raised in Hawai`i), Pila too heard the inner call to return to his Hawaiianess, when he re-opened his heart to his culture, his mind to Hawaiian thinking, and his spirit to Aloha. These words, in particular, pierced his heart, striking home:`A`ole no i `ike `oe i na nani You do not see how beautiful your birthplace is until you go away from home. In April, Pila made his decision to willingly return to Hawai`i after completing his studies in early June. For years, he was ambivalent, struggling to make this decision, as his career opportunities on the Mainland were gigantic and "Oh, so tempting!" But, since "meeting" Leilani, he had looked deep into his heart and clarified his values. Once feeling trapped in that limbo that exists between two worlds with opposite values and worldviews, he was now experiencing the giddy joy of liberation. The "trophy" spouse, the big house on the hill, the luxury car, and recreational "toys" no longer held their once mesmerizing appeal to him, nor did the "conquer nature", "bigger is better," and "swim with the sharks" mind-sets make sense for him. Pila had lifted his spirit's pôhaku, and turned it end over end. And now, united in heart, soul, and mind, he was ready to fulfill his destiny. Thanks to Leilani, his reconnection to Hawai`i had cleared his life's path home. He was bucking the trend, the circumstance called The Brain Drain which sucked "the best and the brightest" out of Hawai`i, but now, he had a mission … a strong purpose … a calling:He resolved to give back -- pâna`i (reciprocate) -- to Hawai`i, and not only survive, but thrive. On the back flyleaf of his twin `Ôlelo No`eau, Pila wrote down these promises:"I will do my utmost to:
Leilani had already made similar commitments, years ago; he was now joining her and others, in Hawai`i and around the world, in a common quest. Reconnected with their kupuna and `aumâkua, in harmony with the `âina and Hawai`i, as kanaka makua-in-training, awakened Hawaiians and Hawaiians-at-heart would become a formidable world force, serving the greater good, sharing their life-sustaining ways of Aloha and setting the better, more loving example. On May Day, with the refrain, "May Day is Lei Day in Hawai`i…Garlands of flowers ev'rywhere…" looping in his head, it occurred to him that June was around the corner, and he would be meeting Leilani in person, yet how was he to recognize her? Pila asked Leilani if she would scan a photograph of herself and send it to him as an attachment to her e-mail, Leilani e-mailed right back, "I'm still such a newbie at this... I don't know how to do either. Maybe you'll teach me how to scan and attach when you get back in June...? " She continued, "Besides,((((Pila)))), does it *really* matter what I look like? 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Hear Only ALOHA. Hear Only ALOHA. Hear Only ALOHA. Hear Only ALOHA. Hear Only ALOHA. Hear Only ALOHA. Hear Only ALOHA. Read Only ALOHA. Read Only ALOHA. Read Only ALOHA. Read Only ALOHA. Read Only ALOHA. Read Only ALOHA. Read Only ALOHA. Believe Only ALOHA. Believe Only ALOHA. Believe Only ALOHA. Believe Only ALOHA. Believe Only ALOHA. Believe Only ALOHA. Believe Only ALOHA. Believe Only ALOHA. Believe Only ALOHA. Believe Only ALOHA. Live Only ALOHA! Live Only ALOHA! Live Only ALOHA! Live Only ALOHA! Live Only ALOHA! Live Only ALOHA! Live Only ALOHA! Live Only ALOHA! Sent to you with heart-felt Aloha. aloha aloha a loha aloha aloh aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha a aloha aloha aloha aloh a aloha aloha aloha alo aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha a aloha aloha aloha aloha al oha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha a aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha a aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha a aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloh aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha alohaaloha aloha alo aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha al aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloh aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha a aloha aloha aloha aloha al aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha aloha al aloha aloha aloh aloha aloha aloha al aloha alo ha ONLY ALOHA PREVAILS
J une came; it was time to go home. Pila and Leilani arranged their first meeting for 6:00 p.m. at Honolulu's Ala Moana Shopping Center at the top of the escalators."You'll recognize me," she wrote in her e-mail, "by the white ginger blossoms I'll be wearing in my hair."He instant messaged back: "I'll be wearing contacts. So you won't recognize me by my glasses, but by the maile lei I'll have in my hand for you."The anticipation was almost more than either could bear. At 6:00 sharp, he stood at the top of the escalators, above the Centerstage, looking for a girl whose heart he loved, but whose face he had never seen.I'll let Pila himself tell you what happened: " An attractive young woman in a flowing purple mu`umu`u was coming toward me. Her long black hair lay back in graceful waves from her delicate ears; her wide eyes, keenly aware and intelligent, yet dark and mysterious. Her lips and chin had a gentle firmness. She was my dream come true, and my heart was doing somersaults.I started toward her with her sweetlei -- her maile lei in my hand. A small, provocative smile curved her lips. "Aloha e.." she murmured. My heart was racing.Almost uncontrollably, I took one step closer to her. Suddenly, the air was perfumed with the sweet fragrance of ginger blossoms. So taken was I, that I completely forgot to look for the white ginger blossoms.I looked at the girl. There were no blossoms in her hair. It was then that I saw Leilani La`imana. S he was standing almost directly behind the girl. With delicate white ginger blossoms pinned to her peppered hair. A woman, well past 45, in a billowy floral mu`umu`u. Her dimpled hands clutching a wide-brimmed lauhala hat.At the time I couldn't place her, but she did look vaguely familiar. Take a look at the picture from the backside of Keali`i Reichel's Lei Hali`a CD, a hauntingly beautiful CD of love songs that Leilani had sent me that had so effectively soothed my heart and calmed my soul during the last grueling months of my training:
In hindsight, I realize that she looked a whole lot like the lei seller in the picture. T he girl in the flowing purple mu`umu`u was walking quickly away. I felt as though I was split in two, so strong was my desire to follow her. Yet so deep and powerful were my feelings for the woman standing right before me, whose loving Hawaiian spirit had, throughout the past year, truly companioned me and upheld and enriched my own.S o this was Leilani La`imana. Her soft, plump face was gentle and sensible, her eyes had a warm and kindly twinkle. My fingers gripped the maile lei, which was to identify me to her.
I did not hesitate. I squared my shoulders, smiled, and held the fragrant maile lei out with both hands, then draped it over her shoulders. I gently kissed her sun-warmed cheek.I was delighted to be in her presence, but deep inside, I will now admit that our meeting was, for me, bittersweet. T his was not what I had envisioned. I was least prepared for the age difference. To put it euphemistically, she was September to my May.Then the words, "ONLY ALOHA PREVAILS" flashed across my mind. I reached into the depths of my being and determined then and there that our relationship would remain precious and dear. It would only deepen, become even sweeter, and I would nurture and cherish it forever. The sweet scent of ginger and the rich fragrance of maile intermingled. I took a deep breath, and the words of a `ôlelo no`eau that we had oft-quoted to one another came to mind: He aikâne, he pûnana na ke onaona. Sweet indeed is a good friend. "Aloha, I'm Pila," I said. "I'm so happy to finally meet you. Mahalo for coming! May I take you to dinner, Leilani?" Ha! It only now occurs to me: THAT was My Moment -- my defining moment. The incredible sequence of events of these past months had lead up to it, for her face broadened into a tolerant smile. "I don't know what this is all about, but I think I'm beginning to get a good idea…" she answered. "I'm Aunty `Âlana," she continued, chuckling. "But that young lady in the purple mu`umu`u who just went by is my niece, Leilani. She begged me to come shopping with her today and wear these white ginger blossoms in my hair. She said if you were to ask me out to dinner, I should tell you that she is waiting to meet you at the bottom of the escalators. She said she had to 'make sure first'. That this was some kind of test."With a satisfied smile, a big warm hug, and a wink, Aunty `Âlana told me, "You passed, Pila … now hurry to her!" It is not difficult to understand and appreciate Leilani's wise caution, especially in a conflicting world that is often intoxicated by materialism and tantalized by superficial appearances. In matters of love and friendship, the true nature of a heart is seen in its response to what is seen with the heart... and not with the eyes. A s a sage once said: "Tell me whom you love, and I will tell you who you are."~ sweetlei@hawaiianlanguage.comDedicated to Pila, ke Kepakemapa i ko`u Kepakemapa. |
