Say what ? El Tihuraca____
" It's El Tihuacanejo, Dad. "
Yes, Trunks. Whatever. He's just taken one sorry little semester of Spanish and he already thinks he knows it all...Well, me too can hablar español no problemo. Let's see...Bienvenidos ! Aquí es el paraíso...
Right.
I don't know if it's just me, but frankly, there's nothing heavenly about a garish four star hotel that suffers from tourist indigestion...This isn't quite what I had in mind when Bulma told me that she wanted to * get away * for a few days. I would have been fine alone with her and even with Trunks and Bra on some deserted island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.
But nooo, the woman had to trick me into leaving an overcrowded, noisy city - where at least I had some space - for an equally overcrowded, noisy village - where there's not even a broom closet for me to sneak in.
Of course, that alone was simply not perverse enough, she also had to invite Kakarotto's entire family along !
Bulma and Chichi are leaning on the counter, still debating over the room arrangement. The receptionist looks pretty lost. Somehow, my sympathy goes out to him.
What am I hearing... ? No, I refuse to sleep on the same floor than Kakarotto......... Adjacent rooms ?!? NOOOOO !!!!! Bulma ! Stop it !!! Pleeaase...
My telepathic distress signals go unnoticed ( what's new ).
I'll soon find out that they were plotting against me from the beginning. I think it's all a conspiracy. That, or an incredibly bad dream. I'm hopefully going to wake up.
Someone bumps into me.
My first reaction is to grab the guy's throat, but I suddenly remember that this is the best way to send Bulma screaming after my barbaric and antisocial behavior. On the other hand, I'd have a very good reason to leave...
" Humpflpl....."
Huh ? Oops. Poor guy is turning blue. Maybe I should let go of him.
" Eer, sorry about that..."
What am I making excuses for now ???
However, the guy - figure yourself a scrawny, sallowish little creature sporting three inch thick glasses and an even tackier shirt than Kakarotto's ( if such a thing were possible ) - is still half sprawled at my feet, coughing - and possibly slobbering all over my shoes.
" Mraak...chlump...chewing...glum...gum..."
Oops again. I made him swallow his gum, and he's choking to death. Maybe I should do something. I carefully glance over at the counter. Bulma and Chichi are still busy tormenting the unfortunate receptionist who looks more confused by the minute.
Good. She hasn't seen anything yet.
I give a slight tap on the guy's back, causing him to crash down on the tiled floor. An instant later, he's back on his feet and staring at me with such an intensity that his eyes are threatening to pop out of his head.
" Thank you " he blurts out with a tone of utter gratitude.
" What the hell are you thanking me for ? "
" You saved my life ! " he says, as a smile - unless I'm mistaking his lopsided face-distorting grimace for a smile - spreads on his lips.
" I nearly strangled you..."
" Oh, I get that a lot ! " he continues, while what I assume to be his smile spreads even wider accross his face.
I'm sure you do !....Maybe I should have killed him when I still had the chance. Bulma has expressly forbidden me to harm people. But has she said anything about killing morons ? Wouldn't I be doing the world an awfully big favor if I thrashed an idiot or two ? Moreover, I have a very bad feeling about this one...
" Hey, by the way, my name is Dilbert, but you can call me Dilby ! "
This is strange. My lips are moving, sounds are coming out of it...yet I have no control over them.
" Vejita. I'm Vejita. "
Upon my saying this, he grabs my hand and shakes it. I'm half expecting to see my arm fall off. He's pretty strong for a weakling.
" Wow, what an interesting name ! I'm so glad to meet you ! "
Danger alert ! Danger alert !
" And I'm really really sorry about bumping into you ! I can be such a yoyo sometimes ! "
Well, sorry if I can't rush to disagree...
Dilbert looks at his watch. " Oh, I gotta run ! I have my first scuba diving class at two ! Boy, this is so exciting ! "
And you know what ? I couldn't care less ! But I'm really really happy to see you leave !
For a moment I actually feared he'd go further into this buddy/bonding thing...
But as he walks away, he turns around and hollers ( and I thought Kakarotto was loud...) : " You're such a cool guy ! See you later, okay ? "
Hell has never seemed so inviting.
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