Q: How did the dead baby cross the road?
A: It was stapled to the chicken.

Q: What's the difference between unloading a truckload of dead babies and
	a truckload of bowling balls?
A: You can use a pitchfork on the dead babies.

Q: Why do they boil water when a baby's being born?
A: So that if it's born dead, they can make soup.

Q: What's red and bubbly and scratches on glass?
A: A baby in the microwave.

Q: What's white, red, and runs in a circle?
A: A baby with one foot nailed to the floor.

Q: Did you know that it takes five babies to make just one bottle of baby
oil?

Q: What sits in the kitchen and keeps getting smaller and smaller?
A: A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler!

Q: What's red and squirms in the corner?
A: A baby playing with a razor blade.

Q: What is worse than running a baby over with a car?
A: Getting it out of the tires.

Q: Why should you put a baby into a blender feet first?
A: So you can see the expression on his face.