Saturday

"See you around Weiß!"

The flashing of the American guy’s glasses temporarily blinds me.

"Auf Wiedersehn!"

I'm blinded again by some overly bright orange hair and slide up my sunglasses just in time to soften the gleam of psycho-man's knives. I can't help but twitch as I watch him lick happily at one of the blades as he scampers off with the other Schwarz members into the shadows. I swear they must've plucked that one out of a freak show...

I stare back and see Aya do his trademark scowl and stalk into the darkness, probably to go brood or something. Who gives a fuck.

"Oi Yooooohji..."

A loud voice pulls me from my thoughts. I blink several times to see Ken staring at me. His dark eyes dart back and forth in confusion. "Did you see where Omi went?"

"Omi?" I ask, my mind taking a moment to remember. Oh yeah! Oh..those two must be having fun...I try to control a smirk as I casually throw my arm over Ken's shoulder. "He'll be fine. Let's go home." he smiles faintly and we head down the street after Aya.

I steal a glance at him. His chocolate strands fall into his worried brown eyes and he chews on his lip nervously, one of his many adorable quirks. I don't know when I started feeling this way, maybe always, but I just know I only feel happy when he's around. He almost seems like he has some kind of light around him....not from innocence, shit, who can be innocent when they kill people on a daily basis for money? But he just seems to be brimming with life, when the rest of us carry this dark shadow over us, as if we‘re already dead on the inside. Sure he carries his own problems, but he doesn't let them ruin his life. He moves on, lives life, and enjoys it. It's that quality that makes me envy him, and what makes me desire him.

And it kills me that he doesn't know.

He's so special, but he thinks he's the most boring one of all. He's never felt important, you can tell by the sad look of acceptance in his eyes. Acceptance that he'll never be anything.

Why did I never tell him...I hate myself.

We slowly walk down the street, chatting about trivial things, he's really the one doing the talking. I just smile and nod every once in a while, too mesmerized by expressive eyes, a cute nose, beautiful...

What the hell was that?!

We both freeze when we hear a small noise down an ally. My arm drops from Ken's shoulder and we both tense up, waiting for an attack. I place a hand on Ken's chest and whisper for him to stay back. I'd die if he got hurt when I could have been instead... I cautiously edge against the wall and slowly peak around the corner. My breath catches in my throat.

Holy Shit.

What the fuck.

Oh God.

Whoa, I feel like I'm watching kiddie porn. I try to look away, but it's like me trying to not look at a car accident or something. Omi has the Schwarz boy shoved up against the wall of a building and I watch the two with a sort of morbid fascination.

My, my..I didn’t know Omi could be such a little hentai...

His hand is down the other kid’s uniform pants as he grinds his hips against him slowly, the smaller boy moaning softly into Omi’s mouth. His fragile looking hands massage Omi’s chest as he arches toward him. I feel my jaw drop when I hear something unzipping loudly.

Damn! Aren’t they a little young for this?!

“Yohji? What’s wrong?”

Oh shit! Ken!

I whip around to see him walking over towards me and also towards the little show in the alley. No!!! He can’t see them! My mind goes into panic mode as the world converts into slow motion. Okokokokokokok...thinkthinkthink! He’s almost here! Oh, God, I’m never keeping any secrets EVER again! EVER! Ken’s standing next to me and his confused chocolate eyes are slowly moving in the direction of my gaze

The next thing I know I have death grip on Ken’s arm and am violently jerking him away. He clumsily lurches forward and collides with me. I try to keep my footing but feel myself falling backwards.

Shit. This is gonna hurt.

I wait to feel hard cement slam against my head but feel...uh...

What the hell is this?!?

My question is answered when a rotten apple slams into my nose. I just landed in a pile of trash.

Should I be grateful or not? My hair’s gonna smell like dogshit for days...but at least I didn’t crack my head open...Why is it so hard to breathe?

Oh shit.

I rake my thick bangs out of my face and my eyes focus on shocked brown orbs inches away. That clumsy baka fell on top of me and I feel a blush quickly creeping up my cheeks.

“Uh!” He says, blinking a few times and turning a bright crimson. His breath smells like the frozen pizza we ate before the mission and I can’t tear my eyes from his slightly parted lips.

“Gomen!!!” he whispers, obviously humiliated. He’s turning a deeper shade of red with every passing second and suddenly I lose all control over my body.

When he begins to lift himself up I watch my arms raise quickly and pull him back down to me. I feel him tense as he’s lowered once again, but since he’s not screaming bloody murder or flailing his limbs in pure terror, I pull him into an embrace.

The world stops for me. I feel like my hearts going to burst to pieces and I inhale deeply as I my eyes flutter shut, trying to burn this moment clearly into my memory. The smell of sweat, blood, and apple shampoo fills my nostrils as I feel the corners of my mouth uncontrollably turning upwards into a smile of true happiness.

He’s so warm....

I don’t want to let go....

Then it hits me like a pile of two by fours.

Love. I was in love with Hidaka Ken. I clutch him tighter, worrying he may disappear if I loosen my grasp. Tears sting my eyes and I realize I can’t live without him...

“Yoh...ji....?” A strained whisper breaks me from my musing and I feel myself trembling from the overwhelming emotions I’m experiencing. He lifts his head slightly so he can look at me. I gaze at him, unable to read what his expression means.

I want to kiss him...

He notices my tears. “Yohji...is something wrong?” he asks, worry filling his voice. He’s so caring...he’s so beautiful.

..and I’m starting to scare myself.

My mask goes up. I can’t help it...it just comes on automatically now. It shields me from pain, at least that’s what I keep telling myself. Yeah, I know it just makes things worse, but when you’ve been doing something for so long, it’s hard to stop even when you know you should...It’s a little like smoking, ne?

“Ie...” I say casually, rubbing the back of my head to soothe pain that isn’t really there. “I just hit the ground really hard and you knocked the breath outta me you fat baka.” I playfully wink at him.

“ ..too bad you weren’t a hot girl or this woulda been a good thing!” I hear myself add and immediately regret it. As I mentally beat the crap out of myself I see something flash across Ken’s eyes, but it’s quickly replaced my mock anger before I can tell what it means.

“Well you had to yank me like there was no friggin' tomorrow!” he says as he rolls off of me and clumsily stands up, tripping a little.

I laugh. It’s an empty laugh, but they usually are anyway. “You’d think being a soccer player and all you’d at least be capable of walking.” I said, raising an eyebrow and smirking at the pout I get from Ken.

“Hey guys! I’ve been looking for you!” a cheerful voice jerks our heads toward the alley. Omi stands there grinning broadly and I wonder how far those two little hentais went.

“I’m sure you have...” I say as I grin back, seeing the boy twitch at the comment. He hops over to us, brushing my comment away.

“Omi! Where have you been?!” Ken cries, “You worried the shit out of me!” He fusses over Omi, checking for injuries while a blush stains Omi’s cheeks.

“Gomen Ken kun, I didn’t mean to worry you...”

Aaah...avoiding the question...he’s a smart one.

“Well of course I worry about you! We’re a team! I worry about all of you!” he mutters and stands up, brushing the grime from the street off his jeans. Brown eyes look at me.

“...Oi, did we eat all the pizza before we left? I’m still hungry...”

“Nani!??!” Omi cries, “That stuff tasted like crap!”

Ken gasps. “Don’t say that!”

Omi blinks. “Say what?”

“Crap!”

Omi huffs. “Ken kun! I’m not five!”

The two bicker as I locate my wallet and count the bills.

“Guys!” I shout. Both stop quickly and look over, sapphire and chocolate eyes staring expectantly at me.

I sigh. “I have some money, why don’t we get some REAL pizza and not that frozen shit?”

“Haaaaaaaai!!!” Omi cries and claps his hands, smiling gleefully. He looks so innocent I have a hard time believing what I saw in the alley a few minutes before...

“Yosh!” Ken smiles and gives Omi a high five. “Arigato Yohji!!!”

I laugh and we head down the street; Omi arguing with Ken about which toppings they want.

“CANADIAN BACON!!” Omi shouts, stomping his foot.

“PEPPERONI!!” Ken cries, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

“But that’s so BORING!”

“NANI!? You can’t go wrong with pepperoni!!!”

“Well let’s ask Yohji kun!”

Dead silence follows.

“You guys pick, it doesn’t matter to me.” I say finally.

Both of them groan.

I snicker. It’s just too easy with those two...

***

“Miki san?”

Who?

“Miki san??”

What the hell!?

“Miki san!!” I feel a hand squeeze my arm. I jerk my head over to see golden eyes riveted on me.

“Nani?” I croak, silently cursing myself for forgetting my new name. Well not officially, but its what my name tag says when I work at the club. At least if they tried to find me, they’d have a harder time doing it.

Not that they’d want to find me. If they really did I bet they would have by now. So...I guess Yohji doesn’t exist anymore...

“Are you alright? You’ve been dead quiet...” the amber orbs stare at me with worry.

Oh yeah, my date...

...Fuck! What was her name again?!

Whatever...I don’t really care. The stupid bitch practically forced me to go out with her. Her dad’s the boss of the damn club and he was standing right there when she asked, so what the fuck was I supposed to do?!

I smile weakly and she begins talking again as we walk down the crowded streets. I’m not listening, the flashback still fresh in my mind.

That night had ended so nicely....

...and Ken had told me about Aya the next day.

If I had just told him then...would things have been different? Do you think he would have picked me?

Probably not...and if he had...he probably would have just dumped me flat on my ass the moment he heard of Aya’s feelings.

The girl stops me. “This is my apartment...” she grins wickedly, “...want to come up?”

No

I stare at her blankly trying to think of some lame excuse when I feel someone bump into me.

“Watch it!” I cry angrily, though I'm slightly relieved for the interruption

“YOHJI KUN?!?!?” a high voice cries and I feel myself being hugged tightly.

What the fuck?! I look down at the person responsible for cutting of my air supply and gasp sharply.

Eep..

[Saturday Night]

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