Written by I was diagnosed with Bi-polar disorder Approx. 3 years ago.Another name for this illness is also known as Manic Depression.This is a mental illness that causes extreme mood swings.It's a chemical imbalance in the brain.What I suffer from are phases of both manic and depressive states.When I say Manic I mean in the sense of feeling very high and alot of energy and my thinking can get irrational and I also known to go on spending sprees.When I am in a manic state I don't gradually come down, I usually crash(resulting in a state of depression).I have been with a worker (CMHA)and I am learning not only about the illness but the signs,to see the signs ahead so that I don't get out of hand well less chances of it anyway.I find that I am becoming more aware of my symtoms which has even helped avoid being hospitalized.When I am in a Manic state and I know I am right up there ,hey as much as I am enjoying it I have to tell my Dr. so she can adjust my medications.This illness is in my family so I don't suffer alone since there are a few of us.I realize there is no cure for Bi-polar but it's treatable,actually the most treatable of all mental illness. Without treatment Bi-polar disorder can ruin lives,leading to mental suffering,problems with family and co-workers ,reckless behavior and as far as finacial disaster.I am quite fortunate to say that I get alot of support from my husband and also my girls.They have taken part in a program for kids with parents that suffer from mental illness.We have a great system here with the Canadian Mental Health Association(CMHA).I applaud the support I received from them.It's not easy but I take one day at a time and now I find that the more I am learning and understanding the better I can take care of myself.My goal with the CMHA is to acknowledge my symtoms when I am either Manic or falling into a depression.I have already began to take notice of the various symtoms which makes a whole lot of difference.Sometimes I just don't know till after the fact but as I say in time I will be even more educated. I do have a problem with working,since I have been off work sick for over a year which resulted in termination from my job,I use to work fulltime then part time then nothing so there was a gradual yet extreme decline in my ability to work.What's important to me is to be able to function at home which is an effort at times, let alone go out in the workforce.I was told that there is a job suitable for me under my conditions.When someone has not lived your life walked in your steps don't really know. It's a real struggle when there is also a history of other issues in my background,which is why I strongly recommend being educated on Bi-polar.Years ago mental illness and abuse ect, were so hush hush.Today we are open about it,I know society can still be very ignorant towards mental illness.I have witnessed it and it's sad.I recall that even myself if anyone looked mentally ill they scared me,I thought they would hurt me.Alot of these people are more scared of you then you being of them.I have met and have friends with various mental illnesses, and it does not stop me from caring for them.What I learned is that I do need my time from them since It can get to be a bit too much for me and that's ok. My strongest support is my family, thanks Victor(my husband) Natalie and Adele,my two precious girls.The girls were in a program with the Canadian Mental Health Association and it did wonders for them.I am truly blessed to have the support since I can be and have been a real handful.My girls are in their teen years so there is pressure as it is,now they really needed to be educated to have a better understanding and knowledge on how to deal with situations and also to become aware of some of my symtoms.I am proud to say that they have sure used some of those tools they learned in the group therapy they attended.It took alot for them to make the choice since it was up to them whether or not they want to take part in the program.Just knowing that my daughters wanted to learn and know about me gave me strength and I love them all the more.Our communication has improved so much when it comes to talking about my disorder.They feel very confident in discussing any issue concerning my disorder. It takes alot for a person to accept regardless of what their illness may be.For all of yous reading this and having a difficult time the "support" is out there you have to want it bad enough and also be willing to help yourself just as much as people are willing to help you.After years of a battle since I would say it's been in my early twenties now that I look back that I have been ill.I found the Doctors that looked at me just found oh she is confused,send her to a therapist(Mary T).Sure therapy was great for my personal issues but I still went years battling a mental disorder.My therapist at the time did make an attempt to have me see another Dr, but again I was told I was not suffering from any disorder.Years later my same therapist referred me again and finally a Dr,(Reveedran) seen that I did have an illness and that was on my first visit with her. I have her to thank for taking what I was saying seriously, and finally I was able to get treated for my illness.It has not been easy.It feels as if it's been one heck of a roller coaster ride which lasted years.Continued therapy is neccessary for me since I know I am not ready to do it all on my own.I need the help for now ,hey one day I will fly on my own(and I won't be manic,,hehe). Support,Education, Encouragement and Acceptance are just some of what is so important for those that suffer from Bi-polar amongest other mental illnesses.I Think about how one can contribute to a persons life who suffers from a mental illness, just by as little as reading up on it the illness.,offering support ect.can make a difference.I know I have contributed a bit here by sharing "My Story" if you made it this far in reading. For those that suffer from this disorder my heart goes out to yous, I can relate to some degree since I may not know you on a personal level and we all have different issuses, but I care enough to feel the need to share You know one of my biggest things was "What will people think of me".It took some time and alot of hard work to be able to no longer be ashamed to say " I suffer from Bi-Polar disorder".For those of you that have been so kind to take the time to read "My Story", I want to thank you so very much .I hope this has inspired you as the many personal stories I have heard/read has actually encouraged me to write one of my own.Thanks to the group that contributed their stories and comments and not to mention support in the Flowgo.com forum.You all know who you are."Angel Hugs" to all of you. Extended thanks going out to Dr.M.Reveendran,Dr.Auger,Mary T,Maggie W,Melanie,nurses at the TDH,Cynthia,Debbie,Andree,DianeD.,ect.) whom all played a major role in my life not to mention in a very professional manner when it came to dealing with my illness.Mary T,Thank You for guiding me in the right direction.I truly admire you for the years of your hard work and dedication to your job as you helped me through my various issues. Also would like to Thank so much Darlene C,CathyP,LaurieP,Chiara N,Brenda B,Jeanette H,Charlene H.,Jo-Jo,Claudette H,Charmaine C&family,Cheryl.M,.Margret L,Angie F ,Christine G.,Denise ,Rita N,Ardrien D, Marcel&Marie-Louise and Kenny for their strong support and encouragement.I couldn't ask for better friends. Many thanks to Kalvin Brown & his great staff at Shoppers Drug Mart (South Porcupine,Ont)Judy C,LynneG, Connie K,TammyM,Laurie B,Rachelle(GerryL) ,Lisa S.,krista D,Carolyn,Sandra ect."Angel Hugs" to each of and every one of you.Thank you so much Sue my big sis for your continued support and to those of you in my family who just never gave up on me.Dad thanks ,without you even realizing it ,you were teaching me alot about my illness.Mom you listened to me while I shared with you, I thank you so much.
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