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| By allowing a few minutes for the pictures to load, the viewer, herein known as "viewer," forgoes any all chance at legal practice for injuries or accidents incurred in the viewing of said pictures, herein known as "pictures." |
| Gary Condit discovers a way to keep the press from bothering him at a recent hearing. |
| Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chretien worries his fellow leaders at the G-8 Summit don't take him seriously. "What are they, hosers? Eh, buddy?" said Chretien. |
| L.A. police officer Desmondo Luis shows off the latest in police fashion. "I love this new look," said Luis. |
| Just another Tuesday morning in Manhattan. |
| Joe Lieberman declares himself "Ultimate Fighting Champion," and vows to crush any opposition. |
| New Englanders are thrilled that their Patriots are picked to win the Super Bowl. Drew Bledsoe, who REALLY deserves that $103 million dollar contract, what with him being the league's all-time leader in rushing and a guy who never fumbles, wears his typical George W. Bush-esque look of confusion in training camp. Won't be the last time you see THAT look on his face. |
| Computer enhanced photos show what Chandra Levy and Gary Condit would look like if they had met in 2045. |
| Not to detract from the severity of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, but in the words of Austin Powers, "Who throws a shoe?" |
| "Reckon we oughtta evacuate?" "Nah, this way we don't have ta leave the porch to shoot up the gooses." |
| As always, Yo Yo Ma knocks 'em dead. |
| AU BON PAIN, MR. PRESIDENT |
| Bush decides he needs to be more "Nazi-esque." "I do like marching and saluting and stuff," said Bush. |
| Apparently, everything in America is just fine. |
| Hi, I'm George Bush, and I'm here to tell you that long-range intercontinental ballistic missile defense systems are fanTASTIC! |
| Bush and a Maine fisherman begin arguing over the rights to a striped bass. Despite the fact that the fisherman reeled in the fish, it was Bush who pulled it into the boat. Unable to resolve the conflict by Maine law, the Supreme Court awards the fish to Bush in what many sportsmen feel is a sign of blatant partisanship. |